honestly, i want to travel the world with a lover
or a friend, maybe fall in love along the way?
i want to take pictures and explore
i want to spend nights and days
with the person i love the most
maybe look at the sunset together
and look at the moon as it shines
into the beautiful night
i want a cute relationship
someone to call mine forever
someone who makes me smile
someone who makes me feel beautiful
a person who keeps me positive
someone who treats me like a princess
a person i can be best friends with
as well as more than that
i wish for that all the time
just want to feel like love is real
that's all i have ever wanted
a soulmate, a best friend
a husband maybe?
fairytales do exist
if we find the right one
that's what people say
hoping my wish comes true
and i find someone
who doesn't take me for granted
who loves me with all their heart
someone who makes me feel secure
as well as safe and happy
someone who puts my doubts at rest
someone who melts my insecurities away
a person who keeps my anxiety at bay
a person who stays with me no matter what
and doesn't give up when things get tough
someone who will do anything to make ''us'' work

just someone i can share my life with
a person i can share my happiness with

i mean, that's not too much to ask for...is it?

I once viewed the world in black and white
Good and evil with nothing between

As I grew older a space did grown
between the white and black

As I examined, it expanded
Until a gradient was formed

Now I see all shades and hues
Without the guiding line

What once was certain is now a question
I can only guess on this chart

Never sure, always cautious
It was easier with just two choices

By seeing everything I can determine nothing
The punishment of insight is ignorance

Lost
between sky , earth , heaven
Searching home, that sweet place never had
Demons took away my thoughts
Becoming alone , reaching nothing
Crossing the river with no bridge
Living aimlessly , with devil mind
Mind blow , mind killer
Spinning in his grip , wretched
Forlorn , helpless , powerless
That voice of Deuce in my ears
Still hearing it in my dreams, when i'm awake
It's killing me softly , lightly , slightly
Maybe i'm insane , it's just my imagination due to lack of sleep
but i know demons trying to control me
till i became killer , cold pro killer
Killing unheartly, no reason but revenge
Smooth Body , Cold mind
Foresight to the untold & hidden future
Keeps saying " La revencha" " La venganza"
"Rematch" "Revenge" Spanish Expressing
Real dark, deep dark , night comes up
he gets up at midnight and sleep when the sun rise
Showing himself immortal , eternal

I have to keep telling my self to stop trying to finish what was never started.
A piece of my insides has been tearing since we departed.
I still miss what we never had.
Ive been holding on to something non existent, nothing that
Existed.
You never shed a tear for me.
But every time that u ignored me for the sake of being solitary,
and then came back to what was left of a whole hearted manifestation of a being,
there was nothing but a shell, kneeling.
Praying to feel what she used to.
But u turned your cheek to all that is filling, nothing was good enough for you.
To even try, why would you?
Its hard to love an empty soul.
Especially when that emptiness is what you crave, and numb is your only goal.

i fell in love once
and my love was the ocean
deep and dark and unexplored
a mystery wrapped in seaweed
and colored with the shades
that nebula and dying stars
reserve for their coldest parts
it was an easy fall
like laying down after a long day
of holding up the universe
with only your pinky finger and
a stack of phone books
or like sinking into the water
not drowning
but hovering
just beneath the surface
air is just an inch away
and you are surrounded by warmth
by cold
by water
my love was so beautiful
their voice was a dying star
an explosion as life is melted into light
the noise of it absorbed by void
and absence
and nothing
their body was the oldest tree in the oldest forest
tall and wide and strong
and dying
but still beautiful
still green and lush where the branches were resisting
still brushing leaves across the sky like caressing the clouds
still humming the noises of a settling life
and since this act of falling in love
i have found that the easiest love to fall into
isn't romantic at all