The days go by
the nights are empty

6 apples and two oranges?
equally?
give me records and maybe
I'll be happy

Materialism makes me smile
And I just want more and more
give me money give me records
give me drugs give me drums
give me girls give me knives

give me fish,  everything! I want all!
yes, all!

In the end I'll just probably **** myself before I reach thirty
disatisfactions guaranteed

the clouds
they hover
over me
i wonder
if my doings will stay
forever

deep blue
crystal clear
i can't keep on
living in fear

all I have are cigarette burns
scars on my arms
and broken bones

I am sorry
but I have nothing left
to give to you
go on and be
who you are supposed to

because I'll stay

Maybe I think that I...
maybe people do too
maybe I think that
I think like an adult
not really

It's an act
I act
like a kid
no tact
no thought
it's a fact
I can't believe
you bought
it
is an act.

Everyday i come back home
with a stupid smile on my face
and tears choking my throat

In the deep sea of helplessness and thought, innocence and meaning is where I float.

Aggression
Depression
SO much of it
cant stand it
thoughts shooting from every corner in my brain
ricochet
decay

I want to let it out
I want to hit someone so bad
but I can't hurt others
so Ill hurt myself
self harm
dis arm
negativity
creativity
****** my skin

my scars shine bright red
and my soul pitch black.

No
no way
this can't be happening
how could it be
why
why did you die
how could you
leave us alone
a feast to the lions
a feast to the devil
you disgusting creature
and you call yourself a man?
you're not even a human being
just a piece of rotting shame with two legs

a feast to the lions
a feast to the devil

urge
urge to slit to destroy to ****
all these empty voids i need to fill
missing these emotions i used to feel
weird sensation in the dead cells
necro
nero
a fallen god of death
fall from grace
tear down your face
smear it all over the place
i bathe in it
your blood
be mine

it's your time to shine, baby

I have nothing to offer anybody
except my own confusion
stuck in nowhere
a plague stricken country
a small town
locked down
and a massive explosion
of emotion
running wild in the streets

You'll forget this when it's over
But the words and the images
engraved in my mind
sanity is tough to find
in these hard times
the bell tolls for me
it's time to end my misery

introduce
the noose
twas a good time
bye bye

Survival of the fittest
Only
only the best
will remain

Chains of society
A new race of people
that obey orders
normal, ideal,
closed in a cage, sealed in borders

this is not the life
I have dreamt of
3 years
it just goes by
it will end
they say
they say it will go quick
fade away
I can't believe that they are unable to notice
that what is fading away slowly
is me.
Look me in the eye
swallow my tears
swallow my fears
see them tearing down my spine
i'm not fine
i'm not fine

looks like freedom
feels like death
it‘s something in
between i guess

Self emotional abuse
It's I against I and it is I who will lose
in this game there are no rules
Just loss and confusion, a game of fools

As my shields break
I break down on my knees
nervous breakdown that is
no mercy no pleas

Dazed, hazed, and confused
rip my heart out and throw it to the sky
launch a rocket and make the country cry
make us free give us life
cut my life with a knife for victory I thrive

My end is my victory
my end is my loss
look down in shame
look up in pride

I don't want to die
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