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Maybe i am going insane,
and nobody notices,
because they're all kinda crazy too.
But not my crazy.
It's said that everyone is on a road to somewhere,
so don't be upset if someone is not walking with you.
But i am tired, and i am lost,
and these feet are weighing me down,
my mouth, it voices abuse, that my ears, can't handle,
my brain is my noose,
my hands seek refuge from listlessness of not being held.
My eyes are tired, they weep tears of nothingness
because my road is being paved
and i must walk it anyhow, without you
And how i miss those moments,
when i had you with me,
those few fragile moments when our paths collided.
And i am sorry i fell apart
because i couldn't bare another person walking with me
because i was so used to being alone.
And how i miss you, and your words
and your conversation, and i could watch your mouth move,
forever.
I can't look back because its too hard to remember
but i know i miss you,
and my brain is heavy from it all
and my heart is wrapped in sticky tape
and i blu-tacked your name to the back of my hand
so i would never forget you, and i am scared to forget, you.
But you were not my crazy, some other kind, but not mine
and maybe i am going insane
but not your kinda, insane...
so i had to walk away,
for my sanity, what is left of it, tagged me on the back, and said 'it's time'.
Still my hand hangs listless, waiting for your touch,
but my arms know there will be no holding you tonight.
Oh god, i cry, but i don't believe in such things..
Funny old thing, in this world, love,
because it comes and goes, at a cost,
and its why my head hangs low from all the insanity that my heart has brought to the table,
in loving you.
 Apr 2013 Pearly Whites
JM
Bloodstained parchments.
Broken oaths.
Chiseled granite
with
promises
weightless as shadows.

But still we lie.

Wading in  the great nothing,
waist deep in murky inks,
wandering
sightless, senseless,
I feel my way.

Memories of grey skin,
black blood.
******* wrapped in ropes,
cherry blossoms
and alcohol.

Still we love our bruises.
  
Blind and cold
in the nothing,
we feel our way.
 Apr 2013 Pearly Whites
JM
Morning blooms grey,
even the birds are quiet.
I broke two more hearts this week
and all I want to do
is hear your laugh.

You put strings in my joints

Your wooden face still hangs on my door
and Buddha squats on my granite nightstand.
Tastes of you are everywhere I look.

You shoved it in my face

******* and fighting
my way back to me,
I'm shedding skin
and growing teeth
and breaking bones
and doing **** my way
and loving it,
really loving it.
Still I hate every second
I am not with you.

*The coldness of your nothing
 Apr 2013 Pearly Whites
JM
Just go
 Apr 2013 Pearly Whites
JM
To the hopeful ones:
I am unavailable.
Emotionally.
He allowed a heartless girl
to teach him this lesson,
she turned his heart to a stone
before she was gone.
At the cross roads you stood waiting,
some design we never would discern-
brought us there at that moment,
prompted by some inner calling,
we smiled at each other at the same time.

A young shoot of life, full of  green foliage
you were enchanting,
my mind was full with a  feeling,
the name of which is yet to discern,
but sweetheart, don't forget this,
the palmy days won't last forever,
we are fortunate to have met,
here at least, we shared our songs,
let's make it sweet to our hearts
so that eternity would resound
with those pangs of love, when  we aren't here.

I imagine me standing
at the crossroads
waiting for you to catch up,
we are but still strangers
belonging to two time zones-
though we are eternal soul mates!

I have my eyes turned to the past,
yours reflect the polar lights of future.
Can we tango together till the  first daylight appears?
No, I am afraid, you too know this
we met at the crossroads
and soon our roads would diverge,
I won't feel bad, no reason for you to be sad,
make it last as long as it goes,
we play the way the part demands,
time is a tricky trap
we struggle like flies in a spider web,
I won't take anything with me ,
as I zip past
except the love that keeps cosmos buzz
remember one is all alone till one reaches the nest.
You have your road, a fine one,
I have mine.
the feeling that we are together is an illusion.
We meet at points
we never expected to meet,
and it thrills us, that's all we could expect
on the cosmic scheme of things.
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