And here I find myself again
In early hours of morning dew,
Drizzle, showers, spats of rain,
An unsteady beat to match my strides
And could the mist replace the hours lost?
Hours spent with no purpose
But for avoiding dreams

Yes here my heart finds comfort, peace
Amidst the overgrown and dying
Besides the flowing of a manmade stream
I see beauty in the leaves
Not perfect no but intricate
Refined
Each put in place for some purpose
To stimulate the mind

And like some pointless explorer I make my way between undergrowth
Twisting and stretching away from nettles
But caring little if I'm stung
Each tree I recognise as a friend
And logs as fallen graves
Each bird sings of a new day
And a new song
And the hope
Such hope
Remains.

No my dear,
Don't blame yourself
Or torture yourself with those
Thoughts of what could have been.

No my dear,
It was no failing of yours
No amount of love or care could
Have protected that child any better.

No my dear,
Don't give up so soon,
You were young and unready
And scared and trapped and shaking.

No my dear,
I can't know your pain,
But I can share it with you,
You shouldn't have to face it alone.

Yes my dear,
You can
I promise you can
And next time will be better.

Losing sight, sound, coherence,
The world shifts beneath me and I'm somewhere else,
Somewhere quiet, but deafening,
Filled with monsters longing to hug me
And I feel nothing but my legs,
Kicking, flailing against the desk,
I'm falling, in colours and pain,
And my voice is calling out without me,
Too loud, no fear, only pure panic,
As my brain loses touch with my spine,
And all I know is nothing.

Death is not the end
As long as memories live
Your story remains

I've got to get out
Of a cage
That I built with me inside
I've got to take off
The cloak
That I made too big so I could hide
I've got to untie
These chains
That held me out of sight
I've got to be free
Of myself
Tonight

I've got to forget
The fear
And walk on my own feet
I've got to release
The pain
And turn from my defeat
I've got to believe
That I
Can be more than just a rewrite
I've got to be free
Of myself
Tonight

Waiting in the empty hours
The fading hours
When loneliness holds my hand
Hoping for different company
Or company at all

Waiting in the solitude
A multitude
Of memories haunt me
Draping themselves around my neck
And my thoughts

Waiting in the pointlessness
The uselessness
Of staying up later than planned
Praying for some purpose
To my dreams.

Waiting as I always do
Always knew
That I was in love with 1 AM
More than I ever was
Or ever could love you.

In the texture of summer air
A hope lingers
A promise
Of future warmth
Brighter days
Simpler ways of living
And almost tangible
Touchable
Tasteable love sits
In every breath
Building up
Bubbling over
And straining to be released
Into the world that cries out for it
A people who long for it
A community that thrives on it
As light pours out
And joins the divided.

Fragile wings
Frantic wings
Beating faster than eyes can
Track across the sky
On summer air
Summer currents a prelude
To summer storms
That batter the flight
And bruise the journey
And fill the sky with darkness
And drive them into hiding
But those wings find a way home
And a way out
To the light
And in the wake
Help flowers grow.

Let the blade slip from your hand
Let it fall away like the blood you tried to shed
Let the past fall too, a thousand regrets gone
Let go
Let every time you doubted fade away
Let every wound heal
Let yourself be free of the fear
Let your heart beat warm blood
Let yourself believe that you were worth it
You were worth fighting for.

A dark streak runs along
The sleeping earth
Whispers in its path
Disperse into silence
Creatures lie dormant
And flowers take a breath
Before crumbling to dust
Which sticks to the feet
And clings to the skin
Yet falls through the hand
Like rain.

Hinted tears shining
Shimmering past all deceit
To cry out for help

Such a sad world
The sky weeps
The earth screams
Where such a marriage
Of shackles and the blind
Seep into the air
Only whispers remain
Of days before hearts froze
Of time before the bind
In destined ruin
Forgone fates cry out
Empty voices in the dark
Insistence pours into
Virtue cracked and crumbled
Upon Agony's altar

I cannot comprehend how anyone
could be willing to destroy life
for no more than fear
for nothing greater than revenge
and less, unfounded hatred.
That anyone could even try
to shatter the future of children,
teenagers and parents alike
twists the mind.

I cannot comprehend how it must feel
to lose a child, friend or brother so quickly
with no warning and no chance
of escape from the crush of
uncompromising grief.
How to deal with the brutality
of a barbaric assault on
dignity and humanity with
nothing even close to closure.

I cannot comprehend how quickly
cheers turned to fear to nothing.
It hurts all the more
because we cannot say "Why?"
For fear of the silence.

Hate always seems to be on the attack,
But if it had won,
It would not need to.
When we say "Love always wins",
We forget that love has already won,
We are defending the victory.

We are the guardians of a stronghold
Built without walls.
We are the keepers of a fort
Protecting hope.
We are the torchbearers
Keeping the flame burning.

Yes, love has been driven out of some hearts,
Yes, dark has descended on some corners of this world,
But the billions of hearts beating for truth
Far outweigh even hearts of stone
Love has won,
So let's keep singing,
Let's keep dancing,
And win again everyday.

On a night like this,
Hate is beyond reach.
On a night like this,
Love is not just winning,
Love is killing off evil.
On a night like this,
Hands cannot help but join.
On a night like this,
Lungs cannot resist singing.
On a night like this,
We cannot stay silent.
Until everyone hears
That love is here.

Between the monotony of vegetable peels and
Ever dirtying water
The glint of an old friend I once held
At arm's length calls to me
The metal that once tempted me now
Whispers for my fingers again
And as my bare toes squirm
In the water that slips to the floor
I find myself unable to resist the thrill
Of thievery
That urges me to steal
My life

In stale shadows of night turned early morning
Only the working, weary and weeping move
In silence they carry out their tasks for fear of stirring
Disturbing those at peace
What could be screams are toned down to whimpers choked into bedsheets
No one would know
No one would hear
In the stale shadows of night turned early morning

A stutter as the shutter closes
And seals away the past
Words taken and shaken around
And stuck in mind to last
In that second I reckoned I could
Speak and still be heard
But a stutter as the shutter closed
Cut off -

The longing burns in
The very fabric of skin -
Armour, yet torture.

And she never said a word
Without the sound of music in her head
She never gave her heart
Until she knew her blood was red
She tried to open up
But couldn't give enough
Until she found herself on the keys.

After school
A girl sits alone
At a piano
And plays
Songs she didn't know
And as she sits there
She learns
How to make beauty
With her fingers
And how it lingers
In the air.

Here, in these ninety minutes,
This means something,
This one shot,
The single chance to prove
That those thirteen days (and a year before)
Were not wasted
Not simply an excuse nor chains
That shackled me to the desk,
To the chair, inside...
This is it,
Do. Not. Mess. It. Up.
Breathe, focus.
Okay.
*"The time is now exactly ten-to-nine,
You may start - good luck."

I hope one day I will be so in love
So enamoured that I cannot help but write to her

That I cannot resist the urge to describe and
Reinterpret my feelings in the most colourful,
Abstract and simple ways.

That I have no choice but to invent
Tales of being together because I cannot
Bear to be without her even for a day.

That I cannot rest for my pen still
Can't quite capture the essence of
My heart's longing for her.

I hope one day I will feel that
But for now, I must write to a girl of my dreams.

So many options hurtle through my mind
Latching themselves to logic for no more than pit stops
Ideas dive through chicanes
And screech around hairpins
And always returning to the same place:
Panic.

As each passes I try to leap aboard
To cling on to speeding concepts
But I am either knocked to the ground
Or flung to the side
And crumple into a rag-doll of
Confusion.

But lying here, wrecked, I lose sight of the race
For a while, the sky, the grass, the air all stand still,
My vision returns, filled now with clarity
Colours contrast and no longer fade
And simply, in the midst of my mistake:
Peace.

I refuse to be one more broken heart
They may try to hate us,
But won't be ripped apart.

I will not be another fallen dream
I know that you can be
The stitches to my seams.

Time and fear will take our hands
And pull you from my grasp
But distance cannot stand against
A love that's built to last.

"Love yourself first"
Where did that get me?
Staring in the mirror
Asking questions
Finding all the problems
To forgive myself for
With no purpose
No passion
No drive

No, my love for myself
Starts with those around me
It starts with kindness
Self-sacrifice
And devotion
To the name of equality
Through which
I can believe
I am worth loving.

It seems we're slipping backwards,
Losing ground, footing, power,
And all the voices, all the opinions,
All the beliefs that shout the loudest
Keep shouting over us
Keep snapping back at us
Keep their hands on our mouths.

But we have marched before,
We will march again,
And our numbers only grow.

It seems we're at the mercy,
Of the polls, or the pundits,
Or the column writers
Or the political correspondents
Whose platforms give them high ground
From which to stamp at our climbing hands.

But we have marched before,
We will march again,
And our numbers only grow.

It seems we're fading away,
Like we were no more than
Dust blown off an old view
An old way of doing things
But we will not settle,
We cannot settle,
For our duty is worth more
Than a few pence a month.

We have marched before,
We will march again,
And keep marching,
Until we are unstoppable.

Two-and-a-half tiles
Separate their fourteen legs
Eight and Six in stand-off
At each other's mercy.

A few circles make Six flinch
A flutter of wings but not
Surrender, not yet.

Eight gets braver,
Slipping silently down
Closing the gap to remove the half.

Six's spine stiffens,
Scrambling up, playing chicken,
Daring Eight to strike first
But neither do.

Eight hesitates,
Six waits,
And they turn,
And take with them
Their lives.

Now we stare in awe
Marveling at specks of dust
That met in the black

Out into the dark
Keep clutching at empty space
And scrabbling for light

We've been told to reach
And to cry out for the stars -
They remain silent.

If you believe, you can do anything
But not that
And not that

If you work for it, you can get anywhere
But not there
And not there

If you try hard, you can fix anything
But not that
And not that

If you love enough, you can be happy
But not now
And not now

If you commit, you can be anything
But not that
And not that

If you're ready, you can face the world
But not yet
And not yet

If you give enough, you can get anything
But not that
And not that

If you stand up, you will be counted
But not you
And not you

If you dream, you can do anything
But how could you ever hope to do that?

I ran, I fled,
Fled from the light,
Lost? Yes lost,
To smoke and to night,
My lungs filled quick
With soot and black tide,
No sense, no senses,
No fear, just pride.

I choke, I cough,
On Judas' prize,
Gone? Yes gone,
The life in these eyes,
But here, I find,
Mortality denied,
No need for air,
Rebirth, not demise.

My chains, my rope,
Severed, frayed ends,
From family, from hearts,
No more I depend,
Alone, all mine,
For me to defend,
Black ribbons raise me,
Mercy descends.

We used to call having a job
'Making a living' but we can't
When living costs more than
£7.50 an hour.

The way working works
Isn't working when
Employment is no rescue
From poverty.

You can't budget
When you can't budge
The ever looming baggage
of debt.

We used to call having a job
'Making a living' but we can't
When living costs more than
£7.50 an hour.

The way working works
Isn't working when
Employment is no rescue
From poverty.

You can't budget
When you can't budge
The ever looming baggage
of debt.

Shadows reach, claws outstretched
Scratching and grasping a trembling wreck
Crawling, scrabbling, breathing rough
Footsteps can't carry you far enough
Moonlight casts flickers that turn into eyes
Grinning and watching a squirming demise
Feel the space close, the breath on your skin
Fingers in your hair, the twisting within
Screaming, screeching, scavengers ravage, draw blood
Keep your eyes open, my pretty, my love.

So make me braver than I'd ever be
You'll bring it out of me
I can dance all night in the dark
If you're in front of me
Who needs sunlight
When I have your eyes?
Your voice is music to my heart
Your hand is my guide
Let's get in hold
We'll take turns leading
It won't be cold
For long with my heart beating
Faster and faster
With every spin
Your light's so inviting
So let me in

I know you don't like to stay in one place
For too long
I know you don't like to sit around
I know you don't like to see the same face
Day after day
I just want you safe and sound

Can't I keep my arms wrapped around your waist?
You don't have to go away
Can't I keep singing in your ear, locked in your embrace?
Without you I'm afraid
Girl, you make me brave.

Are you going out tonight?
Please just stay until its light
Are you heading into the dark tonight?
We'll go together you and I

Fairytales say there are wolves about
Did we really have to go out?
What if we can't make it back in time?
Just keep your hand around mine.

Sick of politics?
Remember when you're sick
You could have voted.

Tired of policies?
Remember when you collapse
You could have voted.

Bored of arguments?
Remember when we're divided
You could have voted.

They speak of strong and stable
From upon the piles of bodies
Single parents, students, disabled,
All crushed beneath their buddies
Sitting comfortably at tables
Ignoring statisticians and studies
Eating enough to feed the poor for weeks.

They "help" the Just About Managing
While managing the damaging
Of every socioeconomic security
"For the good of the country" - false purity
All hints of injustice swept quickly aside
With an aside, a joke, to hide the domocide
Avert the eyes, from the resounding bell toll
As the death toll climbs, losing control

There is no war here, no battle, no fight,
Only poverty and hunger - the trophies of the right.

It seems like the world these days is trying to tear itself apart
There are missiles on all the borders and bombs in our backyards.
The rich keep getting richer while the poor are falling out
And the fact
that fact
is fact
is under doubt.

The generation I grew up in was taught not to hate,
To give and receive in exactly the same way,
But it seems like those above us were sick on that day
And forgot
to let
their morals
come to play.

I don't need anybody to remind me that we're doomed
I know we're in the twilight phase
Between golden days
and gloom
All my future plans aren't seeming that important anymore
Because we're running,
tripping,
falling,
Towards war.

Um ****** ******!
Um ****** day!
I'll be aworkin'
I'll be away
Threshin' the barley
Balin' the hay
Um ****** ******!
Um ****** day!

Um ****** ******!
Um ****** day!
Here I've been workin'
Here I will stay
Feedin' the cattle
Strainin' the whey
Um ****** ******!
Um ****** day!

Um ****** ******!
Um ****** day!
Storm clouds are gatherin'
Sky's goin' grey
But I'll be aworkin'
Right through the rain
Um ****** ******!
Um ****** day!
Diddly um dee ******!
Diddly um dee day!

All the sky collapsed upon
The dashing to the shops
And ushering kids into cars
"Quick, come on, in from the cold"
And with faces pressed tight
Against streaky glass
They watch the clouds crumble
Into a thousand tiny cannonballs
Hit after hit after hit
And then white noise
Made of ice.

I never thought it would work out
I never expected any return
But given a sniff at success
I chased without end
Kept clutching at
Half-broken twigs
That could never have kept me
From falling too far.

A streetlight struggles,
Weakly jabbing at the dark
Making little impression
But the reflection upon that
Solitary flagpole
To a rebellion against
The unphased
Turning of the cosmos.
Its feeble glare
Little more than a haze
Of pale yellow
A smudge upon nothing.

Our spirit tripped
And the onslaught began
Spat on, beaten, kicked
Teeth, boots and hands
Dragged through dirt,
Gravel, splinters, stones,
Pride and courage hurt,
Love and hope dethroned,
No hint of relent,
No easing of the fight,
No sitting on the fence,
Either Left for dead or Right.

Proven truths become
Cracks in the ice
Keeping us from plunging
Into a suffocating void
Living only by the
Facts we're fed
That keep us breathing
But only just
And slowly poisoning
Our brains.

I'm not okay tonight
My focus is brittle
And scampering
Around my legs
Driving me mad
And filling
Every second
With sick, heavy thoughts
I hate them hate
Them hate they
Are not me.

I'm not okay tonight
I'm screaming, curling up
Into a ball of tension
One foot twitching
Breaths shallow
And shaking
Against the darkness
Sticking to my throat
And choking me
Into bed.

Here we go,
The finish in sight,
The warm-up's over,
No comes the fight,
Through fatigue,
Tension and heavy feet,
When all signs say no -
Time to be the athlete