I would do anything to go back.
Anything to go back to my apartment
on the second floor where we lived happily
ever after together.
Sunday morning cuddles,
binging Game of Thrones,
sitting on the counter watching you cook.
Putting the tent up in our living room
pretending to watch Alice in wonderland
under the stars.
I would give up my future and any joy
I may feel to go back to when you loved me.

All it took was that ghosted text.
Realizing nothing was gonna happen,
nothing is gonna change.
Like you, you’re still the same selfish man
that ripped my heart into the useless
pieces they are now.
It used to be a full check, I could win the lottery on how much love I had to give.
But I gave it to you and you lit a match and enjoyed watching it burn.
I’ve spent the last year since you left
waiting for you to show up at my door,
and say it was all a bad dream and
somehow we’d live happily ever after but
you aren’t my Prince Charming.
You were a bumpy road, a mountain I had to climb, fall down and then learn how to get back up.
I am fine without you. Some day I’ll find someone who makes me better than you ever did.
Next time I’ll ghost your text.

The window sat propped open
just a bit.
A few rain drops would drip in
and pop as old songs she didn’t know played
out of the speakers on her desk.
A candle and a lamp gave the room a pink hue.
Just her legs were under the sheets as she sat
reading in bed wearing thin cotton shorts
and a big t shirt she got from her dad.
It was her day off.
A pretty perfect one at that.

I heard two seconds of a song I haven’t
heard in two years
and I thought,
“Should I inflict pain on myself and listen to the whole thing?”
Heart pounding, sick to my stomach
I remember the first time he played it for me.
I remember how sickly in love I was already
and it had only been a few weeks.
How sickly in love I still am and it’s been over a year.
And now I’m wondering if the pain ever really goes away.