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Chameleon Sep 2019
It doesn’t get easier
with time.
You just learn how to deal
with the pain.
Chameleon Sep 2019
I remember going to
Toys R Us on my sixth birthday
and picking out a stuffed black dog
which became my favorite.
I named it Toto.
She has soaked up so many tears,
and really put up with a lot.

And even now, as a 24 year old woman
I sob into her fur and picture myself at 6
and can’t believe I’ve let her down.
I can’t believe how badly this man
who used to love me has hurt me.
It’s not fair.

When does it get better? Because I’ve never
seen the light for very long.
Chameleon Sep 2019
Waking up without him,
in an apartment that still doesn’t
feel like mine has only gotten
harder.
Many of my days begin
with tears or a slight panic attack
just remembering I won’t
get to see him.

I never fell out of love.
Chameleon Sep 2019
This winter will be a lot
colder without you.
I’ll have to double up
on sweaters and
pull the covers up to my nose.
  Sep 2019 Chameleon
ymmiJ
early autumn hint
faintest cool northerly breeze
whispered he's coming
Chameleon Sep 2019
I don’t have anything new to add
that hasn’t already been said.
But all the cliches are true.

I beg the moon to bring you back
to me whenever I see it’s face.

Sometimes I want to run away,
get as far as possible but never stop
running.

I can’t listen to music without crying,
at least a little, because all I hear is
your voice.

And everything, the whole world,
has lost so much color.
It’s hard to feel vibrant anymore.
Chameleon Sep 2019
It feels like I don’t know you anymore.
You’ve become a different person,
but I am still the same.
We went out into the wilderness together
but then you left me to fiend for myself.
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