Chameleon

Chameleon Jun 2019

I’m always questioning myself and
him.
Because I will not let someone take me deep into the woods, and leave me lost somewhere.
I will not struggle to find my way again.

Chameleon Jun 2019

Draft #2

He said he couldn’t wait to
get home to me.

Chameleon Jun 2019

Mine

I’m sitting here anxiously waiting to get home to you like I always do.
I feel whole when you’re there.

Chameleon Jun 2019

Find it

Somehow it’s so easy to lose track
of myself.
Don’t seem to notice until it’s too late
that it’s been awhile since I’ve been okay.
So I’ll search for new music,
go thrifting
and start a skin care routine.
Read a book and spend some time alone
and slowly I’ll start to feel like myself again.

Chameleon Jun 2019

Debbie downer

I’m all down in the dumps again,
I can’t escape the grey cloud that chases you down the sidewalk when you’re just trying to enjoy an ice cream cone.
So I switched to Zoloft.
All the money is gone, so is the fun.
My boyfriend is restless for a bigger city, I’m assuming he will dump me.
I still leave behind hairs everywhere I go, I don’t even have to pull them out.
And my future is still on the same path to nowhere.
The same ****, again.
But it’s day one of this new prescription so,
who knows.

Chameleon May 2019

Careful

I’ve spent so much time sitting on the floor, slowly picking through the debris to piece myself back together. I was almost whole again when you showed up and helped find the last few shards of glass to rebuild the mirror I look at myself in. I changed. I’m older, stronger. But even you said I still look broken and I see it too. So please be careful.

Chameleon May 2019

Funny

There are many reasons why I love him,
but the reason I couldn’t stop thinking about him for a week after we met was because he could really make me laugh.

I realized it the first time when we were sitting at a Waffle House at 2 in the morning and we were talking like two old friends and my cheeks hurt from smiling so much.
I knew I wanted to keep feeling like that.

Lucky for me, he did too.