It was sort of a cliche but I let the warm, happy feeling flow from my cheeks to my toes.
Laying in bed in the dark,
I was on my stomach cuddling our beloved stuffed fox,
while he played ukulele.
It was one of those small, quiet moments that only two people share.
One of those small moments where I had everything I wanted.

It’s just easier to say yeah I’m okay,
and then lay my head down on the couch at the end of the day.
What I’m feeling is selfish, it’s mostly about me.
Just wishing you would stick around and never ever leave.
So I’ve been quiet all day because I know I should be happy for you.
I’ve been quiet all day because I already miss you.

Of course real life isn’t always filled with romance and the thrill of doing things on a whim.
It’s mostly laying around trying to find the motivation to do anything, like go to the gym.
Sleeping in late and getting nothing done.
Running errands and other adult ****.
There are little spats and words that cut and there isn’t always a kiss goodbye.
But there are moments.
Like snuggling on the couch after work when we’re both too tired to work out so Game of Thrones it is.
Little smiles and compliments that are sprinkled through out a boring day.
Real life isn’t always romantic but it’s still nice to be with you.

I hate myself because I destroy my own happiness.
I can feel it in the pit of my stomach, this unwelcome rage that is like boiling water bubbling over the edge of a ***.
I’ve always found it fitting that my zodiac sign is the Taurus because sometimes I can be so stubborn, I won’t budge.
I can gleefully sit and watch everything burn around me but then instantly regret it as I am left in the ashes wondering
what happened?!


Nobody brings me down better than I do.