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Paige Jan 2015
Maybe I do it
on purpose.
But it's for a good reason.
I believe the saying that
goes something like,
distance makes the heart grow fonder.
I can't wait to live with him
someday;
But it's nice to have someone miss you.
Paige Jan 2015
I have always been the earth.

There's soil in my veins.
Paige Jan 2015
I don't know if I could
ever collaborate with another
writer.
Unless they get inspired the
way I do.
Smoking a bowl,
reading,
a perfect sunrise or sunset,
the flick of a candle in the dark,
and the way his arms feel around me
after being apart for way
too long.
Otherwise the whole thing
would make me sick,
and probably ruin everything
about writing.
Paige Jan 2015
Today I was made aware
of someone who battles
with the same thing I do.
Instantly, I felt so much
sadness for her,
knowing that she struggles
the way I do and feels
the same pain and hopelessness.
I just hope she has an outlet,
like writing has been for me.
It's funny,
that I have known her
for awhile and never knew.
Just like me,
she has become the master
of faking it.
It pains me,
because she is still in High school
and is still so young.
I just want to tell her to
not let it hold her back,
or destroy any chance at
confidence and happiness.
She can still find love,
someone will want to help,
and support her and make her
feel beautiful every day.

She told me something that
has warmed my heart more than
anything else has in a really long time.

She said, *it's good to know I'm not alone.
A girl I used to be in Marching Band with saw my Instagram post about the tangle I bought. She told me that it really makes a difference and actually ended up helping me by realizing the same thing she did. We are not alone.
Paige Jan 2015
Here, in what I guess must
be my favorite spot.
Cross legged on top of the
sheets,
chain smoking and
writing,
I am comfortable.
Watching rich people get awards,
between reading Bukowski,
the bear he gifted last Valentines Day
lays on its back beside me.
The bear makes for good company,
but he would be even better.
Because even though the silence
is sweet,
there's nothing more delicious
than sitting next to the
person I love.
Paige Jan 2015
Sorry,
I don't think drinking is cool.
In fact,
I know that it can be very
dangerous.
If done in moderation
and on special occasions
then I say go for it.
But if you drink to fit in
and do it often enough
that I know how much you
drink by Facebook posts,
then I will think that you must
be a dull, boring person
because you need alcohol to
have fun, or make people like you
or make guys interested in you.
I don't think anyone has ever
made a good decision under
the influence.
And if you must black out
and make an *** out of yourself
with every free second you get,
then at least keep it to yourself.
We're all adults now.
Who are you still trying to impress?
Paige Jan 2015
I hate just sitting in
this body.
Wasting all that I could be.
I don't want to try anymore.
I haven't dyed my hair in
months,
I haven't felt joy in weeks.
The harder I try,
the more I fail.
I feel so unwanted
and unappreciated.
Each day gets worse,
before I can even try to
make it better.

I'm just kind of done.
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