why am i here

poor
lots of problems from the past
no vision for the future
(and she says burden worthless complainer not worth my time)
/same person/same people

gets job
slowly fixes problems from the past
unhappy but has conscious plan for the future
(and she says love of my life)

                  same person
i am
                    are u

         i know i am

and were u ever

u dont try hard enough so im done trying at all

idk
idk anything

nothing is at all the same without you

u arnt enough human to unveil how it hurts

learn how to be openly selfish
u will need it to be alive

if u dont hear from me know that **** is going like it should

i have no bad feelings for anybody

not doing anything different than anything anyone else has ever done i just look at it differently

**** **** u

i cant be myself with anyone without ruining everything

i love u i just dont know how to get past this

no idea how to continue

take it how it comes to you

there is nothing u can do

some people see all things with finality and to others everything is another open door

i hate u maybe more than anything for the way that u live and the way that you leave

learn from mine
neever ever feel alive

do anything i can do to end the night without talking about how i really feel or having to fake ****

worry about problems
worries about perceived problems

pause take a break
give yourself a minute
pause take some time

how do u lie like being alive

i dont ******* trust u ****

Slowly loosing purpose

idk how to be alive

No, nobody came

Find me when u can’t find me

this is getting harder and im starting to question if it was what i thought it was at all

i love beginings just not what comes after

i learn new things and forget them shortly after
i like that

this isnt what i wanted

there isnt much time left

always faded

idk anything just completely lost in general

i wont be lied to

humans arnt human just a weak imitation

live in a lie too long and a ghost is born
that lives under and hovers over your every waking word

i never wanted u to be something i couldnt loose
you lie now with a placating smile
empty words trying to convince me
that what u never proved is the truth

what are u and why do u want to do this to me

you are a liar annn so much better than me

none of this is funny at all to me

i dont care

i love you

im not afraid to die anymore
just not ready for it

let the dead stay dead
they are happier there

u don’t understand because of who u are 4 cars colliding on purpose as fast as they can go

U can’t unmake ugly

read what im saying because its for you i am for you

let em sleep idgaf