rescue me with yoursmile

useless passion is all thats inside of me, writhing

u r taken for granted
when you are all that should matter

some gone girl is speaking when next to my bed
whispered linnet murmurs preying online thru perilous sheds
blue under trees under the moon to leave shadows in your head
god is unloving and fabled in redress
i am a tomb i came too soon i am the tomb to live too sssoon
with lead palms crawling out of skin molds to scratch at the moon
fingers left crinkled and shriveled under what is new
uncluttered archers in stone slit platoons
letting them go letting them go letting it go letting them go
im staring down sideways to watch it unfold
everyone can smile and everyone can glow
but it takes a special evil to hide it from all
limbic numeracy is past reaching goals
it spreads and descends upon the lives it unfolds
its holding a Mesmer that cloves what hasn't sold
then spreads it like skelter across the crust of the world
god god god god how the **** are u where have u been
i need u we needed u like now its like
i ******* never want to see u again
like here is the palm in the eye of the world next to a
doctor boring gold mines into the veins of the scourge
riding checkered pale hearses across blank frail reading boards
educating all our current lovers on eternity and remorse
ur lacking the emotion to understand why it hurts
ur lacking the heart to feel when it ******* burns
your understanding is nothing to the weight of my birth
u live like a vulture failed in naming her worth
i dont give a **** what u take into your remission
the reaper undevils me u know im lacking ambition
the burning in my throat is the lane of my life
empty bottles living rags eating forbidden apples like its nothing
screaming and unbelieving and inhaling the rest at night
bareskin is deadskin thats the only way she could like
its unburdened there where the aqua violet struts and stares
im terminally confused and in unending repair
thats the only way i can survive it not that i like it
just the only way to survive in it and its ******* nothing how i like it
it just reminds me of this and i want to burn in hell again
i need it to continue ill burn in hell again
**** u for thinking you owned anything
im alone in this no one is watching and touching m y shoulder
when im writing this i am alone in this i already disclosed it
i am emulsified in it the world that is forever unopened
and i never even learned how to calm down
and breathe in
this is all that its worth and u arnt enough human to unveil how it hurts

Acumen lens, you shudder, and panting ensues
Inglorious vault of confided delusions
That opens again as wounds, gleaming death beams
On wrists and hearts a bruise, chemically indoctrinated
By the sway of the way that she moves

Heathen goddess, mourned through nights
Just passing by, all the avenues, of this dauntless brain
Beat my drums with your fiery fists, frail and bone bare
Yet, they never once have missed
Until your heels cascade down my tongues unrolling train
I will not breathe again

one other thing **** old people
who act like they world stops for them
and it is okay to be an ******* bcuz u old
idgaf  if u are 90 20 65 48
an old man with a cane
old lady with a red hat
my grandparents idgaf
u dont deserve respect for living  lets get that **** ******* straight

if u a racist
if u an *******
if u are iggnorant
age doesnt excuse u from being human
burn in hell

dont write things because u want to write things. slow/ patience/ dont think/ it will come when its ready and u will know and it will be genuine and that is all that matters

it just comes down to what you value i would rather be homeless and in love than rich and empty and u dont feel the same way

this is how i want to live in
this is how i want to live in
white clouds and burial mounds
to cloud my indecisions fake lights
would bury me despite my own addmissions
but im the onee thats aglowing gun
when their shovels meet the skin
over dreamless mouths never
been forgiven snakes start out livid
screaming love all of your feelings
but they circle dead in readingvein faced stories from hearts that
they believed in
how can i still see them ?
thats what i could nvr sleep in
pale lights touch you like dead inside
and never let u leave them

one other thing **** old people
who act like they world stops for them
and it is okay to be an ******* bcuz u old

idgaf  if u are 90 20 65 48

an old man with a cane

old lady with a red hat

my grandparents idgaf

u dont deserve respect for living  lets get that **** ******* straight


if u a racist
if u an *******
if u are iggnorant

age doesnt excuse u from being human

burn in hell

faked xray reports/forged retinal scans/phony lab tests/secretly amputated limbs

prays to god 10 years old
playstation/basketball hoop/girlfriend/so upset
prays to god at 10 years old
**** me now give me cancer
i cant handle this she moves to texas
******* prays to god 16 years later
this ***** killed me, ruined my life ******* **** me
nothing
doesn't pray anymore

not good enough

lazy

lets people walk all over you

cry baby

half human

need help

embarrassing

ugly

vapid

afraid

alone

ugly

violent

ha­teful

indignant

spiteful

miserable

ugly cold

stupid

accident

sleeping dreaming about life
awake dreaming about death

look down when im writing like there's blood on my hand
life touchss my shoulder in the absence of death
muss be dripping from the nostril from its bobbing crystal head
i know its because i pulled out yellow flowers from spaces they left
stop beggin u remember he says to a doe shaking water from her chin
into your hands put them into your hands i put it into your hand
i hope u understand this that even tho they are full
they are as good as dead //flashing half eaten hearts off a cold gluttonous god// wrapped in a moth eaten blanket
mine was never open enough to be filled with regrets i know
that all we ever meant is what is left
i know that all i know to dipsense is death
ive been worming into and undergoing more than a modicum of stress
pale birds still sleep when they bleed out their pigment
i know because i watch them out my window
when the moon lifts its head
they plead with the weather thru crowding lachrymal stems
I FEEL SO BAD cuz god its so obnoxious
when he beats his barbaric chest
then pleads and cries like a ***** when he cant hold his breath
where was the last time u felt alive its not next to
or even around me who has given you life
even tho i never mean it even tho you always see it
im a creature with eyes i feed on unbelieving
finding every cross-way to die

let the dead stay dead
they are happier there

oh my gosh oh"is that what ur saying sir? umm excuse me but thats just not me, i always say the lords name in vain. and all the subliminal marketing of your consumer artistry is making meweak an gag, im puking out all over in the bathroom upstairs past the solid maple tables past the circle murals in pairs who is there going to hold onto my hair when ur busy drooling about grandfather clocks high as **** doppelganging 2 levels flourished below me  all the tans and the colors of the north arre closing in where everyone and everything are turning into furniture store manikins stubborn geriatric commercials with one foot already on the conveyor belt to heaven and i just stand here and put the chips in, wrist here maam, forehead here sir just lift up your skin, living memory card into your left hand so u cant forgot all the horrible **** that u did, and ur on your way again back from indecision wht the **** else could u invest everything you worked for in, i can tell you
where to place your last faith in, you are going to die, people tell me laughing almost every-time so what the **** is the point of warranting anything, invest in a quality product that completely dissolves your thought process and rockets you into purgatory, where all the other good spirits are prostrating begging to be inventoried all the dead fathers and husbands and all other price tags shes still floating on that ocean signalling ships in with her omens and they are driving into the rocks just to hear a second of her laughing

at finding my insides a conical waste,
unfettered and zealous, I strolled deep into flames
in jungles of obesity and anticlimactic falls
the auras of her spells instantly dissolve
and all of the noises his bloated coffin gave
removed what remained, inside
velvet smoke culled like a viper
exhuming its prey
now hobbled crutches sway at the prow
(ship of gold holding more blue than the sea)
inhaling drops of silicon through the heated chemical rain,
melting
praying for this specter to absolve
even as it was forgiven in Eden,
now blue and useless
buried in clouds

put yourself first

put others first

out of the mouths of the same people over and over again so which is it
and how do you know which to choose

vampire queenvampire queen

money bags, smokestacks, white powder and heights
on bent boulevards with brutal windows
reclusive silhouette stalkers hidden just behind
red mourners on charcoal ice
window shades plume, dust and ash diffuse into
twin horned rebels with sawed off exhaust pipes
ashtray dance/\clouds hover in the dark
as she tightropes straight down into the devils heart
the mirrors that surround
are as a shroud passed down
from the heavens to alter truth
all the cracks between the blue
are here resembled
love, dearly distorted
in the absence of breath or youth

people will use u until u have nothing left if u let them and it doesnt matter what kind of blood they have

oracle leave your windows open
out from my mind  
breathe into my heart
god went
widows vast sleep
black veil beneath the dirt
eyeless destitution
envy me a-wake
circumspect
swollen world beneath lids of glass
unable to stray  unwilling to relent

what the **** do u want from me

sick of being alone all the time

white cube hovering
4 white walls
white ceiling white floor
doors scratching hangnails
at hand of Solomon
cats wailing in
rats scratching
littlest fears distance
white windows white halls
future engine
hide this fast future discovers all
white horse white falls
space cannot be agreed with
space is just to live in
embalmed in everything that matters
and world keeps trying to steal it

im telling u when this stops being real its over
and idgaf about money or **** all those fake ******* can **** my ****

oracle leave your windows open
out from my mind  
breathe into my heart
god went
widows vast sleep
black veil beneath the dirt
eyeless destitution
envy me a-wake
circumspect
swollen world beneath lids of glass
unable to stray  unwilling to relent
cold hands ofwind
reeving rain of maggots
wriggled warring past palms of dissonance
to feed them and to feed the earth that bore them
line fingers slip into pockets white glow,
bent backwards
through traps set in speaking walls
woven together wet red on lattice
ravagingthrough energy
paused
staring at a moon wolf dressed in drag
sputter out coughs in vain
when he hustled away some rain away
with bitter sentiments + cooling breezes
insects skitter blac the town  
human is old and slowly leaving
he rose like a god

light emanate grey and white below
blanket the stars in violet and warm
mass falls onto backs
ascending he smiled
light of a thousand suns
fill into the cracks
cobblestone and wood
heart cold and dead
lives beast again

its so funny how many problems people i know have and want to pretend like they dont exist no one wants to talk about in real life its like u know everyone knows but u would rather hide it and fight it alone, thats not me idgaf what anyone thinks, im not ashamed of me or anything if its to hard to be a part of this then okay thats okay im not asking for your help keep doing what u think will save u

left over  a limp prodigy that is ****** half to death the cold marker is pulsing white and burning red on his skin bent down boring black antlers into a dichotomous spirit pulling out the entrails with a fanatic regret he laughs so hard when he is leaving and the other side shakes his head, where are you going ***** you are still the biggest part of this, other says the angel you are reeving barks when u pass through its hands  is that the message u want to send when you fall out of heaven are those the words that you would speak quietly floating past Cerberus just save your penny hell is empty just crawl into a ******* hole let your forever in dirt endure moonlight  and transform you into bones this forest is empty and pigment lures the ghosts broken headlights are the bobbing lanterns that your memories impose translucent ax lips biting on shoulders kept bleeding for more did you leave a mark on them too when you ****** out their souls? am i just a human fixture in the black hole of your home? would u miss me if i dissolved and left u my warmth?  
i dont trust the way that u wear your eyes holding everything i know is feeling behind what you claim to nevermind ur lying i know ur ******* lying every person breathing has something to hide u say u loveme and need me u said you’d never lie  u promised that u meant it when i told you I wanna die
i dont understand prosperity/functionality/practicality/
pragmatic asides
i dont understand what you could gain from absorbing a ***** preaching purity shaking hands with a convent of flies i ******* hate u preternaturally u are the unbirth of it all i never meant a word that i said i am empty rolling my eyes here waiting to watch u dissolve

let em sleep idgaf

role models: Judas

every1 wants to p[lay some game
so i say okay
less play
i love you
just need them too
its family
its the truth
i love you
but u dont need to know the truth
i dont really love you
i just think i can fix u
cant u tell by how there is nothing to talk about
when its just us two
cant u tell by how i dont give a **** about what your writing about
and youll never see my name on your dashboard u tooo slow
cant u tell by how i distrust u and sleep, soo much longer that i need too i know
*******
pay me or pay u
gonna shut u off
cold isnt it
are u alone
*******
know the world is drying
dying towel drying
no water left
*******
feel sorry for your sins
**** no
*******
repent
**** the smiling *****
straightoutof Magdalene
hey
SATA?N
hes not there
i been asking
god is here
but he doesnt ******* care
he doesnt ******* care
he doesnt ******* care
he doesnt ******* care
hedoesntfucking care
your love is here

ask god for a small place to stay
away from everyon and everything
that made u feel this way
he;llll!
hellsay hes working so hard
preparing a place
for your rotting creature pelt
to hang above his fireplace
u can trust with all the brids
that know seeing isnt believing
so fat with faith
sidestepping windows
like theieryer necks were made of
neckbraces
unable to kneel down
andpuke it out
fly with them
until they remember
somethings are invisible
and they matter just as well
im standing on the edge of the felt
the putting green orb u fell onto and melded
so u grab your blak crows
and fly fly fly
******* hard
******* full force
until you fly to ******* hard into it
and break your neck
and remember
before u die
that there is nothing to believe in
even when you are well
there is nothing to be decieved by
you were born worthless
branded with a dollar sign
and yyour holy ghost
wont pay the hospital life
ur dead
because u believed in life
birds are dumb+haldf blind
im blind
but i could see what you were doing
with empty sockets or backwards eyes

bipolar depression manic depression multiple personality disorder delusions hearing songsthat arnt playing hearing voices that arnt speaking hallucinations nightmares stupor absent mindedness impotence insomnia anxiety what did people do when medicine wasnt here
**** yourself
cut off your ear
drugs
mor drugs
alcohol
graffiti
head in the oven
2 shots in the chest
poison
break ****
destroy ****
ruin things
ruin everything

white owl breathless beaming
pale is favored ghost
**** how you are feeling
when u feel it **** the most
breed evil when you’re sleeping
ghost finds pale is home
*** life under purple
is bareskin under bleeding vol
while you are wide away
sad poison smiles weeping
lungs sawwed off life precedents
for coffins that they’ll slleep in

i dont handle relationships like every 1 else rather be sad and aware than happy and oblivious there is no trust humans are flawed and evil

animals are so much better than humans

give someone your vulnerability they will take it and forget who u are or that they asked for it in the first place
take it back and they will panic and give all their love and affection until they get what they want
then it starts over again

people change according to what they believe another person wants when they want what the other person has