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Apr 2016 · 172
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fix yourself and find what you are looking for
Apr 2016 · 189
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if u really care for someone..

i dont know what to say
Apr 2016 · 208
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Apr 2016 · 169
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this is dead not physically but mentally and spiritually a corpse
Apr 2016 · 208
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Apr 2016 · 172
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give it time I told u you are mistaken to believe anything or anyone beside myself will choose when I die
Apr 2016 · 191
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409
there is nothing worse than living against the things you cant change
Apr 2016 · 271
in dreaming
depth perception: limbs like brushes, black lungs scraped for paint.
this is how a creature is made:
stealing far too much time away
in thoughts, a worm, in a book or in a grave
I’d imagine a fatal infection feels the same.
fiends that are hooks
surrounding me
attached to my graves
are spending far too much time away
in sleeping books
that I read directly to them
they dont ******* listen
interpreting my words their own way
while I have been just waiting
waiting to be carried away
caligulas mark a blurry cross
hammering christian screams into pulpits
maiming
all these ******* fiends
all that were dear to me
swinging gallows with a belt, missing me and hammering freely
im not like them, I’m not free
stirring in indecision while I watch myself bleed
dwelling in solitary secrecy.
what is left to see
there is nothing
although there is this wind, as the metal eagle settles into skin,
a sunburst of splatter against a backdrop of sin
falling thru a mouth u opened and took away
stretching a canvas onto rusted coral grids
beneath a bridge white wind flourishing
conscious waves of traffic electric stops and starts
This is it floating from limbo into static human art
the summer on pavement
the winter is red
abstract and unrequited
bones out of mouth trailing  
a perfunctory rainbow spout
bones and jelly spread perfectly
an imperfect message but full of colors
lead on a leash through the pavement
from pleading dry bread lips
that before were sewn shut
in small cracks in rubble and filth,
the ***** blooming black flowers
too soon, or too soft
bloated fingers wave
rubber burned red
at what could have been
eyes setting fire to this consecrated patch of regret
amused as they struggle
in all the clustered corners of alleyways downtown
standing in the open
devils chasing dragons
leaving their offspring in the garbage
in a multitude of godless hosts
god wont rise with them
he says smear them like beacons
in remembrance of your long winded comatose
at every place where those flowers fight to grow.
jesus i swear it’s like Mother Mary’s garden eloped
with a self righteous catalyst of chemical throats
all sinning reletntlessly
immaculate creatures
****** raw by their own ghosts
and i know no matter what he says
they will never grow
they have no souls they will never grow
god watches down from empty space
stars planets celestial stains
with eyes from two kingdoms
living the dead
is he reading while i write this
she said he watches every subtle move we make
You see the dead like i do
floating over early graves
waiting for the forbidden fruit
like i do waiting for a small mistake
does he understand what the **** im saying
or does he only see in black and grey
Feeble struggling tongues sliced off
brought to bended knee muttering
how he speaks:
let their tears fall blue
and let them pray for red
they will never grow green
always reaching clandestine
from small clusters of flowering leaves
at the base of the river Lethe
we wont let them forget to struggle forever
through purple snaring weeds
(As we watch) grey angels drooling godlessness (omniscient breed)
soft feline lips begging
for a silver drip of  water
or a touch of ***** sunlight
on flawless unbroken skin.
he is watching, and the world is dripping
from an overflowing belly sun dangling from a cross chain
tethered to my dreaming while I am here struggling
epiphany manifest in me
a new way to **** inhibition, a new depth perception,
and a poison to escape this reality
Apr 2016 · 222
408
408
cursed with something I never wanted and can’t get rid of
Apr 2016 · 197
406
406
apocalypse apocalypse apocalypse
who is the horse god
Apr 2016 · 251
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405
no one could love you for real you are less than human u can’t feel anything u are nothing and that’s why they told you before you are cold and uncomfortable no one will ever love u for real
Apr 2016 · 234
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Apr 2016 · 257
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Apr 2016 · 176
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I don’t understand people who care more about themselves than other people
Apr 2016 · 174
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Apr 2016 · 179
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398
just because certain things are widely accepted as truth it doesnt make them true
Apr 2016 · 269
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specifics dont matter if you are unhappy that is all you need to know
Apr 2016 · 270
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did things i wouldnt do said things i wouldnt say blamed myself but i should have never it just was never right for me
Apr 2016 · 421
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give someone your vulnerability they will take it and forget who u are or that they asked for it in the first place
take it back and they will panic and give all their love and affection until they get what they want
then it starts over again
Mar 2016 · 291
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i have something im holding maybe not reality but better than what im having its nothing this is nothing
Mar 2016 · 244
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393
this is nothing anymore go to where you want to be it isnt with me it was never with me
Mar 2016 · 240
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Mar 2016 · 210
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Mar 2016 · 237
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390
rather to be dead than to live like this how to fix it there is no way to fix it
Mar 2016 · 232
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389
watching someone you care about suffer there is nothing worse
Mar 2016 · 263
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388
**** fake friends where are u now i dont care about myself and u know that this has nothing to do with me
Mar 2016 · 228
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387
just sitting here watching it happen and there is nothing i can do
Mar 2016 · 242
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Mar 2016 · 233
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life is uncontrollably ****** up and there is nothing that can fix it
Mar 2016 · 221
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Mar 2016 · 236
fuck u
just heard a dad tell his daughter “idk how many times i need to tell u this the world is not interested in the opinions of a 9 year old"
Mar 2016 · 234
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Mar 2016 · 214
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382
everyone understands my problems except for me
Mar 2016 · 243
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i have no bad feelings for anybody except myself
Mar 2016 · 208
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380
why can’t u say anything I’m saying everything I have to say and u can’t say anything
Mar 2016 · 243
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Mar 2016 · 257
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i would shoot myself right now if i was able to cope with how it would affect everyone i love believe that
Mar 2016 · 277
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don’t know how to plan **** things just happen and I go along with them
Mar 2016 · 216
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going to Thailand in august idk if I’ll come back
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