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Olga Valerevna Feb 2013
Tell me who I am to you and beg my thoughts again
So I can rest assured this time that truth will never bend
I am not clay for you to mold or mix with what you will
Diluted into something you can neither hold nor spill
The substance of my flesh decays, corruptible indeed
But soil only brings to life my neatly planted seed
With shell intact I bare the weight you've placed upon my ground
Finding rest inside a world you've neither sought nor found
And were I to defend myself, respond to what you've said
The words I'd speak with tainted tongue would fall upon my head
A guillotine to execute, suspended thoughts the blade
My recompense - the blood I shed for what it is we've made
Olga Valerevna Jan 2013
Such beauty lies within her stare, a pallid shade of grace
What once had been invisible has shown upon her face
Collective thoughts have danced their last, in sleep they take their rest
Until the lonely girl aglow confronts her final test
In this is life - that what is fought cannot be seen with eyes
And so she must lay down her self to see past all disguise
It's only then, in spirit's dress, will everything be clear
Even if the only soul is hers that draws in near
title taken from lyrics of a song by Deathcab for Cutie - Transatlanticism
Olga Valerevna Jan 2013
you've gone around this loop enough times to know that you've seen this all before, the ****** war.

and with eyes painted every shade of red there is no water left to clean your flesh, there's nothingness.

so it will dry upon your bones, dismantle joints until your limbs can move no more, they're too sore.

then you will try to look inside with all the strength you've somehow kept, because you wept.

you see, these tears have been collecting through the years not one forgotten, they're stored within.

just take a drink to quench your thirst and you will know what pain can do, it pulls you through.

for there is life found inside your strife that manifests when you are dead, you'll wake again.
title taken from Copeland's "Should you return"
Olga Valerevna Jan 2013
I've invested time
Was it worth the while
In a darkened vile
I have held denial

And I let myself
Keep a burning hell
Made a prison cell
Where my body dwells

I can barely breathe
Every thought a sea
And I choke on heat
From the waves' debris

What have I let in
With an open grin
In a dance I spin
As I burn my skin

I am ashen gray
Like a night in day
Every word I say
Imitation  clay

Where there once was truth
I replaced with you
And I merely do
What you tell me to

In these chains I walk
Shackles tight, can't talk
Turn my mind to chalk
Let you pick the lock

Do you need more space
Rearrange my face
As I speculate
You've already claimed

And I know for sure
Even as it were
That in place of her
I've become a blur
Olga Valerevna Jan 2013
I want to find a pair of wings before I  float away
'Cause flying gives you more control so you can leave or stay
But every time I try to search I step on shallow ground
And thus the journeys I take on are all the more profound
I scribble down with shaking hands the places that I've seen
And hope that any details missed can fill the in between
I've come to know this dusty road is longer than it seems
But facts are only relative to poorly written schemes
It's only when my balance slips that I become attuned
And fully comprehend my state, to lies and death immune
Enveloped in a cloud of fog, I've made it past the shore
Of everything I left behind to float away once more
Olga Valerevna Jan 2013
is to be empty so you're all I can contain
Olga Valerevna Jan 2013
What's worth more, your life or mine?

Is one a purpose undefined?

Do I have less to think and say

on any single given day?

If you're above then who's below?

You've made the claim but do you know?

'Cause how is judgement really passed?

Propelled by truth or moved too fast?

And if you try to pull the reigns

Can you uphold what it sustains?

Or will the mark you tried to make

suspend the lives you put at stake?
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