you get one day to cry
but tomorrow
it’s time to fix your crown

i hope i pass on
long before you do
i don’t think i could
learn to live a life
without you
our endless laughs
laughing so hard
our tummies begin to ache
crying on each other’s shoulders
longing for the pain to pass
even when you shout at me
and say awful things
you wish you could take back
i wouldn’t be here without you
and i can’t be here without you

though i miss my old friends
they were always toxic to my life
i spent many months alone
with only my family
to keep me company
now i have lifelong friends
friends who truly know me
and accept for who i am
they will never know
how much i truly love them
they are mine and they always will be
they can go far and
i promise you
they will still feel my love
i owe you everything
you saved me even
though you didn't realize
thank you so much

the ocean blue waves
pull on my feet
begging me to come in
if just for a little bit
i'm afraid if i give in
my body will never
wash to shore

every poem i write
is about you.
every last one of them.
no matter how hard i try
to fight it.
every single letter.
has traces of you
pressed right under the ink.

Mental illness is like burning paper in the daylight.
You can hardly see the flame, but the pages disappear.