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feed me poison,
watch me die,
savour while I struggle.

stab me with knives,
hear me cry,
make my screams your favourite song.

cut me up,
bleed me dry,
swim in my tears.

let me go through hell,
in beds of fire, lie
make castles of my ashes.

leave me behind,
and say goodbye,
carry with you a piece of me.

but please.. don't say you love me
only to lie.
I don't know, if I still care
But that doesn't even matter cause you're not here to hear what I have to say
And since you've gone away
I've been living in my yesterday
Forsaking my today
night and day
I've been searching for the answers at the bottom of every bottle
Trying to fit in the thoughts that don't even really matter
Sometimes I just sit back and push the throttle
And see where I lead myself
I don't believe myself
And I don't even really know where I see myself
With you, without ourselves
Is what they say is true ?
That we can't ever escape from ourselves
Well *******, **** everyone that has a need to tell
That there is heaven and hell
Good and bad
Maybe I should just **** myself
Maybe I would, but I guess
I don't really even care anymore
****.. I'm getting sentimental again
I am getting mental again
Maybe it's all just a game
Of names and lies
What do you do when you see someone else in those eyes
Before you can speak
The moment dies
You think you can finally sleep
But it eats you inside
Besides, you can't really tell if it's just a spell or you're losing your mind
Maybe you need help
But no pill is kind
My will is fine
My heart's still mine
Been around the world
I should have paid heed to the signs
Now there's something that feels empty inside
I've been looking but I just cannot find it
So **** it
I'm gonna take the bottle and hit the throttle
Get away from these voices that keep on getting louder
Maybe love is just not a word and tears not just water
****
I'm a thousand miles down and I've still got her
There's something about it, something about her
That drives me crazy.

— The End —