I run as much as I could from you, I knew you would come sooner or later you'd look for me , you did.
We try ,tried to stop but clocks kept on  ticking; time couldn't forget or forgive.
I said no. I am not going with you , but we danced... & I ran again but you came after me asking me to stay I kept on walking, pretend I didn't heard then you hold my hand , so I turn back again.
We went to take some fresh air , I needed to think and believe I wouldn't do it again...

In my messy head thoughts fighting my past feelings ,out of nowhere you swept me off my feet, carring me and spinning arround like a time machine. You put me down and said this words:  " I am right here , I came for you , and I am not going anywhere ´cuz here I am"
-I looked down feeling impassive - as if I were in a surreal world.
He took my face and said no tears allowed, tho i wasn't cryng .

We went away and forget the world then we revive dead past feelings and gave our souls some joy.
I was touching you , you said no . "Not like that , don't touch me like  this as if it were the last time because it won't be." I stare in silence and you took my body with love and pain .We are drawn to each other that's what fate was  trying to say.

Rolling one, the room was full with smoke and I saw the galaxy in a motel's roof , you held my hand and hold me tight but I wasn't there it was too late, the moon I couldn´t take .This song was playing in the middle of it  "you are everything I love , you are ,my deepest thought that's what you are , I am who loves you the most that's who I am , who will give his life for you that's who I am , I am here right next to you and i am waiting here until the end you can't imagine how much i've waited for you because you are what I love the most that's what you are"

Soul back into my body , nirvana was that moment I am sure. But I am sorry it was morning so I ran again away for good.

choking on unpleasent feelings
can you look at yourself in the mirror?
would you break the glass or rather kiss it? I would rather cut myself ...
Depression trying to get on my nerves .
I am fighting but my stupid image won't let me win , is that wrong? am i wrong?
mistaken ego with lies.
I don't feel safe , not tonight , not with myself.
Everything that i didn't want to feel or show is coming out.
Anger , pain, fears, feeling so hurtful, never do nothing right , never do nothing good, Hurting others and me.
i double dare to look at myself in the mirror , i did and felt so ******* unbeareble ugly.

Love is Real, innocent and pure -
                                             when you don't see each other as grown ups, but as childs.

My heart was wishing for his wishes to be me, me on the end , me dying out of love.
Him dying out of my absensce. Us laying on the ground of loneliness..
In the middle of a crowded room playing for drinks and strangers to forget for good, both.

My soul was shaking, because i was. I was your wish of dead and olvido. I was your most wanted love, the one who hurt and the one you hurt back until we bleed. My soul was grieving for the hapinness once shared and for the times we didn't care.


My body was aching from missing you, it was torturous to know you woulnd't come , we couldn't fix it. I couldn't feel my arms when i hugged you ,and you didn't back.My eyes were sore for crying too much.

My mind was tired of fighting feelings  and emotions i couldn't take ,it was desperate from the obsessing love, the memories that came at night , the illusions that kidnapped my dreams.

It didn't stop until this year, it has been too much , it has been too long for our endless love, it has been enough for forever.

I'm glad to tell you I no longer love you,  or wait for you.
I'm happy to know that i got no chains , no hold backs, no regrets...
My debts with the past are over, I only have heart for the future.
No matter how hard they try to make me feel down , no one is able to let a storm into blue sky.
I will love him, because i am free to love again.