Feel... I wanted to feel something . Anything.
I want  to run fast and far away.
feelings , i want those emotions.

Love I wanna know what it's like .
Life , I need to take you all in.
Feel, I wanna feel everything.

Anger, clenched jaw
Fists punching what come across,
Hate all over the place, hate everything and everyone
Pain always pain, exploding in rage
Anger anger is all that is left .

My teacher told me everyone was a liar , institutions , family ,church!
He was telling me about our hopeless young generation
Dissapointed on life that's what he seemed.
I smiled and told him not to worry , there were people who was good .
besides everybody is a liar maybe he was lying too.

Then i realiized life it's not worth for any sadness nor fatalism or regret.
Life is beautiful and charmin' only there you'll find love lies too.

I wish I had the courage to say everything I think
I wish I was brave enough to do as I preached
To stand up for my beliefs
I wish my voice was heard and I wish it was louder
I wish you would join me on a path of real freedom
I wish I stopped my own limits
I wish I was stronger.
I wish all of us would fight for a better world, no authority , no countries, no borders ;
Imagination and love at its highest expression
or I wish I was normal ,no. That was a stupid wish because there is nothing more wonderful, beautiful and surprising than craziness.
I might not scream this out loud but I’ll write it down ,so you know the ink on this paper Is meaningful and soon it will all stop  being wishes.

it feels right to say  those forbidden words
it feels warm hearing them from you, i'd be blue if they weren't true.
take as a conffesion my honesty. Don't shoot your arrows into my heart if you don't mean them.
i'd run away if you deceive me. But i'll stay forever if you say it again ,look into my eyes , exactly in the right time,just in the right place, say those forbidden words and i will say them back to you . "I love you"

Standing i was spinning.
you scream out loud you love me , and you did , But you deceive me.
Your screming had no meaning now that i have seen you with her.
I could be selfish not sharing your love with another woman , but you were selfish hurting me knowing you would .
I'm sorry because when you realize you can't love her I won't be there to let you love me and love you as i did.
You'll notice i'm always around in your mind , in your thoughts, in your heart; in your soul...
and you'll know you let me go , when I was the one.

Verte salir de lo sombrío , dice que soy un terremoto y lo sacudo.
me gusta el olor a tu piel y a cigarrillo , y sentir tu mano por mi espalda .
tus caricias tienen la presión exacta, tu locura combate la monotonía y deja que nos enredemos en el encanto.
las cuerdas de guitarra rasgan los sentidos  y entre música se impregna mi insania .
Me gusta tocarte hasta los huesos ,sentir su dureza hasta prenderme de ellos.
Entre drogas , noches , y dulces arrazamos con esta ciudad entre los dos.

No tengo ojos para verte, solo el corazón para latirte.                                                        
¿Cómo pedirle al olvido que no me roce? Si la soledad me acompaña entre tus recuerdos.
Vaivenes de tu piel acalorada, la luz de mis pupilas con tu cara,
Deudas interiores de tan solo sentimientos.
Tu risa maldita quebró mi corazón, pero me inundó el alma.
Tu arrogancia embriaga mis sentidos;
Para morir eres tu la única arma.

I couldn't recognize his face ,He was walking with a sad air around.
Me watching through the ***** window on the bus ,It has been ages since those thoughts hit me ...
Shocking!. His illness getting him lock in solitude , i have always thought being alone was the best, watching his misarable existence made me realize I couldn't be more wrong.

I apologize mentally with him in name of the ignorant ,prejuicious society that we are; How we judge people that are blameless for their **** luck .
Second thought comes along , tell me how to believe in god in this harsh reality , does it even exists? and if it does why would let that happen ? It only made me hate it .

Unfairness world full with superficial people and empty meaning lifes;  critizicing without knowing what happens inside.

I'm glad to tell you I no longer love you,  or wait for you.
I'm happy to know that i got no chains , no hold backs, no regrets...
My debts with the past are over, I only have heart for the future.
No matter how hard they try to make me feel down , no one is able to let a storm into blue sky.
I will love him, because i am free to love again.

Gone your laugh
gone my illusions,
gone your touch
gone my senses,
gone your lips
gone my kisses ,
gone your eyes
gone my gazes,
gone your ears
gone my songs,
gone your love
gone my love.
still have our souls left.

There he was lying on his bed all emaciated with his gaunt face , trying to smile but his muscles didn't work anymore; so fragile.
I met him since i was a child so innocent.He came and became a father to me even tho he wasn't ;so strong brave almost like a hero , teach me how to skate talk and behave.
Now I'm seeing you struggling with death and found myself trying to give you some sort of energy , motive  for life .
At your weakest point i fear, but when things got rough for me you smiled ,
Here you have my sweetest biggest smile from heart behind my serious face you have to fight.

Red and pink liquor on your lips, let me taste forbidden passion i might just like it how it feels.
Entertaining sadness away from here , feeling lonely and feeling nothing is it all there will ever be?
Deciving hearts playing around I thought love would come by now , there’s a heat of emotions I can not feel . Do you mind if I’m honest and melancholic just for the night? Maybe you can stare into my eyes and see what is inside , is it soft and vulnerable or all you see is emptiness and stone inside?
Should I see you , you and your life carry on around you with all your charm and bourdens , I’d like you to share what  sorrow you have inside. Good listener , missing me , missing you and all the things we had got.
Oh you noticed what a liar I am , no one ever knows who I really lie to , ain’t no one of you, I lied to the mirrors I believe is the only way to go on , get by without saying the truth .
Ain’t  youth a cheating life they think it’s easy just because of that ,I might not recognize my voice or your face , all I got are memories inside , slowly turning ashes to dirt . Nothing.

I know I am cold. I’m so sorry if I changed ,I’m not perfect believe me ,I didn’t want things to be  this way, I destroy everything I touch that’s why I don’t want to  touch you dear, you’re too good and I’ll break your heart even if I don’t want to, i will.
You don’t deserve the way I treat you, but I’ll lose you anyway. I can’t fool you anymore I can’t give you my bitter shatter heart if that’s what you want.
  You have given me everything so I can’t ask you for more and I’m so empty I got nothing , nothing when it comes to love.

Love, i know i've been waiting in vain...we are missing things to hold on to,but no matter time or reason, i won't let you go. I can't. It's beyond me,i've found myself uncapable to forget, i blame it on your smile wich hunts my dreams.

How i feel You when i  hear the blues, i got the sorrow on the freezing nghts,so heavyhearted and cold no longer emotion comes from me, except except when i'm with you; hapiness that's what you are.
Ironic,we've come and go but through all we stick together, that's how much i carry you...changes,pain,hapiness, age and even lovers.Yes, i must accept you've made weak and crazy.

You've also made strong, strong enough to let you in and give it all, to be humble and caring.To fight for a dead romance in the middle of our games ,with the rest of a broken heart ,you ,just you ,will always be in every piece of it ,every single piece of the forever.

It couldn't be true could it?
How?
I need an answer how am I so broken ? How I'm so messed up?
I'm always feeling angry or not feeling **** at all.
I'm scraming in my head all the time , I am closing my eyes trying to stop .
Why is life so ****** up , why it has to be this hard?
Mommy don't you cry I'll pull you together even if I'm down.

Holding my hand walking through the city, with raining purring down on us. Lights bright everything was shining. It felt like we were back, back of being two kids , back to falling ******* …love , it felt like He was never gone, it felt complete , it felt like never letting us go.
I saw the colors through his face  , the lines that said everything , it was pink , green and blue, and his smile made feel good; he tried to get me back and reason with reality and coherence but I was gone away , away with happiness and incoherence , away seeing his face.
We walked miles and miles he reached out for my hand , I felt so safe; I’ve never felt like that before , He was mine , mine in the night , mine in that moment, mine in the ephemeral time of forever, And I have always being his .
No words needed I know his gestures I read his looks and he’ll get mine, nobody know what we were laughing about, Us sharing a secret no one could understand, secrets, secrets staying in our minds, his malice and my naive thoughts getting along, me thinking of love while he remembered us in the beginning when it all started back in the mountain in the cold.
Years and years have passed and this day he came for me, buying alcohol he said “Stay right next to me” I hold his hand tighter, never wanting to separate.
We walked back to the balcony, listening to crystal fighters knowing love was really amazing, he whispered in my ear:  would you stay with me tonight? I fought with myself in silence I seemed so preoccupied, I was nervous and excited but we both know the answer was a yes, we took a cab and have some other trip to love.
We get there and while we were making love I knew no one would ever make feel like that , I wanted him so bad so so bad, he said “don’t worry I am right here”  explosion of emotions , colors, we came and we were free.
Why can’t he see what I see? He thinks he’s worth nothing, I think he’s everything. I love everything about him, his perfect skin, his hair, his mouth, his perfectly shaped nose which makes me recognize his face, his childish smile, his clever mind and how he knows treat mine, the way he sleeps so peaceful, the tone of his voice saying my name, he carrying me to bed touching my body with his big hands, I could sleep in his back forever so tone and strong he is, he is the man I love, He is the one I love.

Don't you dare to say you love me , liar , liar I'll slap your heart out until you're true.
You made me write out of anger.
I got too close , you make me get too into it, you pull me closer to push me away.
I might try to fix it once , I warned you about my character but you didn't listen.

You took a bet on breaking my heart too bad I figure out and always wear a shell upon my heart: you'll never get there fool , No one can hurt me; I thought i told you , I thought you felt my icy hug.

If there's a promise I can make is that you'll come back regreting what you lost therefore you replace it with something that couldn't be compare with what you had.

Go ahead , go with her but don't come back , You don't have me and never had; I need nothing from no one, I dont need your paunding cheating heart because no one breaks mine.

He perdido los ánimos con el paso de los años, incluso esos de ayer en los que había ilusión…
He perdido la cabeza, envenenándome de a poco con drogas y alcohol
La depresión a mi derecha una pistola en mi cabeza, una flecha de cupido sonando como una canción.
La soledad determinante siempre mi más fiel a acompañante me enseño de comprensión.
Notas musicales y suspiros innombrables son mis sueños de afición.
¿Cómo creerle al amor en esta vida si todo está hecho de mentiras, si de nada sirve el perdón?
¡Quisiera que me quieras como se quiere la primavera en medio de una revolución!
Así… no le dispararía a mi cabeza sin tornillos, escuchando un bandoneón
Dame esa luz en tus pupilas, dame el beso escondido de tu boca, dame el amor que no existió.
Escucho los latidos de tu fuerte corazón, los tomo como palabras de mentiras de esas que sabes decir mejor que yo.

My heart was wishing for his wishes to be me, me on the end , me dying out of love.
Him dying out of my absensce. Us laying on the ground of loneliness..
In the middle of a crowded room playing for drinks and strangers to forget for good, both.

My soul was shaking, because i was. I was your wish of dead and olvido. I was your most wanted love, the one who hurt and the one you hurt back until we bleed. My soul was grieving for the hapinness once shared and for the times we didn't care.


My body was aching from missing you, it was torturous to know you woulnd't come , we couldn't fix it. I couldn't feel my arms when i hugged you ,and you didn't back.My eyes were sore for crying too much.

My mind was tired of fighting feelings  and emotions i couldn't take ,it was desperate from the obsessing love, the memories that came at night , the illusions that kidnapped my dreams.

It didn't stop until this year, it has been too much , it has been too long for our endless love, it has been enough for forever.

choking on unpleasent feelings
can you look at yourself in the mirror?
would you break the glass or rather kiss it? I would rather cut myself ...
Depression trying to get on my nerves .
I am fighting but my stupid image won't let me win , is that wrong? am i wrong?
mistaken ego with lies.
I don't feel safe , not tonight , not with myself.
Everything that i didn't want to feel or show is coming out.
Anger , pain, fears, feeling so hurtful, never do nothing right , never do nothing good, Hurting others and me.
i double dare to look at myself in the mirror , i did and felt so ******* unbeareble ugly.

I run as much as I could from you, I knew you would come sooner or later you'd look for me , you did.
We try ,tried to stop but clocks kept on  ticking; time couldn't forget or forgive.
I said no. I am not going with you , but we danced... & I ran again but you came after me asking me to stay I kept on walking, pretend I didn't heard then you hold my hand , so I turn back again.
We went to take some fresh air , I needed to think and believe I wouldn't do it again...

In my messy head thoughts fighting my past feelings ,out of nowhere you swept me off my feet, carring me and spinning arround like a time machine. You put me down and said this words:  " I am right here , I came for you , and I am not going anywhere ´cuz here I am"
-I looked down feeling impassive - as if I were in a surreal world.
He took my face and said no tears allowed, tho i wasn't cryng .

We went away and forget the world then we revive dead past feelings and gave our souls some joy.
I was touching you , you said no . "Not like that , don't touch me like  this as if it were the last time because it won't be." I stare in silence and you took my body with love and pain .We are drawn to each other that's what fate was  trying to say.

Rolling one, the room was full with smoke and I saw the galaxy in a motel's roof , you held my hand and hold me tight but I wasn't there it was too late, the moon I couldn´t take .This song was playing in the middle of it  "you are everything I love , you are ,my deepest thought that's what you are , I am who loves you the most that's who I am , who will give his life for you that's who I am , I am here right next to you and i am waiting here until the end you can't imagine how much i've waited for you because you are what I love the most that's what you are"

Soul back into my body , nirvana was that moment I am sure. But I am sorry it was morning so I ran again away for good.

They meet again after all these years.

Black:
-You again! making me come back ,I have felt all kinds of feelings because of you ,one of the mains was hate you made me hate it .We hurt each other too much every time, maybe distance was the answer I met other women I learned and live again without you.

Moon:
-You're lying and you know it , it's not me again, it has always been me ; non stopping! and it has forever being You, I know I know you had feelings for others but  none of them will be as fascinating as I am ,and you know that, everybody knows that. And thought you could live without me don't forget  I did good without you too.

Black:
-It has been too long ! you were my high school sweetheart , life tear us apart everytime and i don't find the reason why fate would bring us back ,therefore I think there's no reason just love , as complicated as our story can be... it has been there all the way.

Moon:
-I am not your High School sweetheart , I am the love of your life.

Black:
- Yes ,you are.

Love is Real, innocent and pure -
                                             when you don't see each other as grown ups, but as childs.

My poems are no longer for

                                                   you ;

                                                           Which means you've been (finally)  Forgotten.