Natalie V

Natalie V Dec 2012

There he was lying on his bed all emaciated with his gaunt face , trying to smile but his muscles didn't work anymore; so fragile.
I met him since i was a child so innocent.He came and became a father to me even tho he wasn't ;so strong brave almost like a hero , teach me how to skate talk and behave.
Now I'm seeing you struggling with death and found myself trying to give you some sort of energy , motive for life .
At your weakest point i fear, but when things got rough for me you smiled ,
Here you have my sweetest biggest smile from heart behind my serious face you have to fight.

Full with pain and love ,Everyone who knows what is like to be with someone dear that is fighting cancer.

Natalie V Nov 2012

Crazy Possible Wishes. (-A-)

I wish I had the courage to say everything I think
I wish I was brave enough to do as I preached
To stand up for my beliefs
I wish my voice was heard and I wish it was louder
I wish you would join me on a path of real freedom
I wish I stopped my own limits
I wish I was stronger.
I wish all of us would fight for a better world, no authority , no countries, no borders ;
Imagination and love at its highest expression
or I wish I was normal ,no. That was a stupid wish because there is nothing more wonderful, beautiful and surprising than craziness.
I might not scream this out loud but I’ll write it down ,so you know the ink on this paper Is meaningful and soon it will all stop being wishes.

Something different from what i've showed when it comes to my writting, hope it makes you think of something.

Natalie V Nov 2012

Untitled

My poems are no longer for

you ;

Which means you've been (finally) Forgotten.

Quote.

Natalie V Nov 2012

Anger.

Anger, clenched jaw
Fists punching what come across,
Hate all over the place, hate everything and everyone
Pain always pain, exploding in rage
Anger anger is all that is left .

Natalie V Nov 2012

Beach.

I hear the waves crashing against the sand, the smell of your hair shrouding me; maybe I’ll let my feelings take over…but no.

I want to believe; sometimes I think I do, I still don’t know, bad thoughts.
Into a vicious circle between oblivion and memories, what I want and what I do are different things, as I want to have you & as I never will. Just like that rubbing time for it to freeze, to stay in eternity…so it would last forever.

You lying on my shoulder, me fighting against my inner demons creating illusions I destroy as fast as they’re born, what do I do? What am I doing? I’d like to go with it but if I kiss you, it wouldn’t be unique; it wouldn’t be a perfect moment anymore.
You confuse me and make me clear, If I say I love you too, would you take me back? I hate you sometimes, you tempt me. Finally you have made it hard to resist.

Eyes closed, heart beating faster, you’re in front of me breathing so close I can feel it ,making my body shudder yours is shuddering too. slightly, lips touching , heavy breathing , you held my hand tighter I like how it feels, you try to kiss me you ruin it, we play a little longer…snap back to reality . You smile ,I kissed you on the cheek , you’re in love and I don’t know what I feel sure it is strong and good almost divine , we said goodbye hiding hope behind words.

Natalie V Nov 2012

12:00 pm.

Don’t wanna feel him , i don’t want to close my eyes and see him; don’t want my memory reminiscin’ .

I refuse to smile at the idea of you.
You are not here, you are not there <3 .
Then why am I writing to you again?
I’m so tired of saying goodbye, of saying no more of letting you go.

Natalie V Nov 2012

Letter of forever.

Love, i know i've been waiting in vain...we are missing things to hold on to,but no matter time or reason, i won't let you go. I can't. It's beyond me,i've found myself uncapable to forget, i blame it on your smile wich hunts my dreams.

How i feel You when i hear the blues, i got the sorrow on the freezing nghts,so heavyhearted and cold no longer emotion comes from me, except except when i'm with you; hapiness that's what you are.
Ironic,we've come and go but through all we stick together, that's how much i carry you...changes,pain,hapiness, age and even lovers.Yes, i must accept you've made weak and crazy.

You've also made strong, strong enough to let you in and give it all, to be humble and caring.To fight for a dead romance in the middle of our games ,with the rest of a broken heart ,you ,just you ,will always be in every piece of it ,every single piece of the forever.