I wrote it in tiny letters so you wouldn't see it
the piano and violin playing
from the other room
I thought you were sleeping

the night made from darkness
collapsed on us
frightened

my heart somewhere next to you
will I see you tomorrow
probably no
I hope so

everywhere I look
I try to find you

no messages
saying hello

my heart was tired
cigarette ashes on my shirt

I play angry
the song so melancholy

everyone telling me
who hurt you

my heart dying

supine
you told me lies

now I see
we're so uneven

said you love me

but you didn't

string of lies
the cobwebs are glued to my skin
can't wash you off

I'm still there

don't look back
one more time

there was room for us to grow
I had to jump out the window

don't ever forget my name
carry it with you

I guess you never liked me

did you not want to learn
something you would forget

drawing lines on my arms
these won't leave scars

autumn
it's time to hide under long sleeves

I use a permanent red marker
hoping no one takes a peek

I soak up the ink
waiting for my skin to dry

I know how to hide
I let them underestimate me

I let them control me
so I can learn the way

sometimes I have more power
than them
doing what they say

don't underestimate my lies
the bigger the line
I feel fine

I don't want to live here anymore
killing myself slowly

I don't think I love you anymore
You're pulling me down

I believed
we were everything
you and I
were everything

believing
you loved me

stop lying
losing your faith in me

did you see me
for who I am

turning around

I don't want to be here anymore
I believed
You loved me

I'm always running away
from the liars

you lost your face
for a while

don't leave me alone

even if I begged you so

trying so hard to let go

I'll hold on tighter

don't leave me alone

even if I said so

I'm desperately screaming inside my head

no I'm not okay

the voices say I'm a burden

so I shut my mouth and forget I'm broken

I can feel it

every inch of my skin

I'm sorry I can't say it

please just leave me alone

Turn off the lights
Are you a vampire ??
close the curtains
no one is looking inside
I hate your laugh
I hate your voice

I want to jump out the window

Everything you do makes me go
You give me eye rolls

What's this game you play
No one will ever love you this way

You're so uptight
I can't breathe beside you

Let me steal your brain
Give yourself a break

Turn off the lights
I didn't ask

You make me so angry
I only wish to never see or hear you again

everyone

everyone

everyone lives on the moon

everyone dreams on the moon

everyone loves the name moon

everyone talks to the moon

field trips to the moon

everyone wants the moon

everyone loves the moon

everyone waits for the moon

everyone looks for the moon

everyone

everyone

fields of green

clouds don't follow me

some days I'm so happy

I leave my body

I find myself back through the night
trees so high

I wonder if they hate me

sometimes

I wonder if when I learn to love
I'll have no one to love anymore

us three
so full of life

I want to hug them close
and keep us frozen in time

I feel so free

I left my body

I'll find myself tomorrow

if I can't see you through the dark
if I can't see you in the light

it's nevermore

leaves dripping with wet drops
it hasn't poured out

you're crawling into
webs
you'll be held in

it's only if we're together
we act so graciously

back home
we don't know
we disregarded
each other's names

it must be this way

it's all for wasted love

Rain drip drop can't stop
I want thunder and lightning
Nothing can stop me

Try again flowers red vase
I never have a happy face
Thank you anyways thanks

I see no rain ugh
look another useless day
lost mind staying sane

I don't deserve good things

don't go into a hurricane for me

I'm not worth saving

even if our love rots me inside

it's all I have

I will stay by your side until you **** me

I will stay until I go insane

you made me weak

I was a good person

now decomposing from the inside

everything is the same

where is the hope

I only see the conflict

let me in

I locked myself inside

it's better this way

I never knew you at all
I don't like this feeling so much

I'm trying to hold on
this lost love
false promises

I need to feel your skin
see your eyes
open with the sun

when I see you with someone else
I figure you'll fall

I'm drowning in high waters

I never really want to let go
I need to caress your hair
one more time
hold on tight
to these pretty lies

look in your eyes
glimmering in the moonlight

I never know what you're thinking of
I don't like it at all

could you give it up

the one you love

could you give it up

the day-star

I'm talking to you
spinning in circles

listen to me
because I might cry

can you give it up

I'm not asking for much

It might hurt

line's I can't erase
sleep on it
tomorrow is your day

I know what you're up to
I have to disappoint you
there's a way for me to move on

If it wasn't so hard to love you
we could cross this plane
I tried holding you close

let me in
all I needed was you
take the key

don't lock me inside
I won't be sorry if you leave
I won't be sorry when I go

you'll never have my heart
until you let me go

I miss you
on my happiest days

let's go to dark places
soft glowing lights reflecting on our faces

I'll accept
you won't stay this time

leave me here
I'll die alone I know

let's stay quiet
forget about the noises
soak in the silence

hold your breath
longer
until your lungs burn

I'm hopeless
just hold your breath
more time
I'll tell you when I'm fine

will you take care of yourself
do I have to grow up so fast

I'm never fine
let's avoid the daylight
I can feel my skin sting

don't ask questions

the pressure rains down
I feel so down
it's a long way down now
hold your breath

let me rest

I can't be honest
I wrote you a letter
I'll never send

I can't show you myself
for who I really am

I'm a pretty cloud
floating away

You loved me
when I was deep in
deep waters
I was drowning

I've never talked back
I let my words cut me deep inside

I've got a lot on my mind

so please call 9 1 1
if you don't hear from me

call me
9 1 1

I'm not feeling well
you're a liar

I can't be honest
with people who never change

you're the loneliest man alive
now I'm your
Ms. Lonely

sometimes I let the demons write
for me

they take countless pages
I don't remember anything they said

that wasn't me
that wasn't me

out of proportion
to an extreme

have they corrupted
my entire mind

the pen is fading
when did I start to cry

hard to imagine
I'll ever change

but I do every day

I don't want to let a moment pass

I hope I don't fall behind

express my love

maybe I should call it quits

I don't want to ruin my mind

I

I

I

I

change in ways
no one understands

I

I'll never be ready

(I don't want to ruin my life)

This sadness
does not define me

        \ \ \

but
    am I
       it's
           definition
                                ?

all of them left

said i was too deep in

too heavy to carry



no one is watching me now

the empty chair

moving from the bottom

why did they go



i'm so lonely now

i'll have to save myself

now that i remember they left saying

i was already drowning



i don't need a

rescue

i'm not passive drowning



i didn't a lifeguard to teach me

life is pretty
people starve
people ****
people run
people suffer
life is beautiful
people rob
people hate
people discriminate
people die

what's a day in your life
some can't live with their minds
some are looking for a life

this is life

wake up early
get off work
drink coffee

It's time to drive
for hours
in dry miles

Everyone leaves you
you're stuck
driving home alone
in the return

take care

wake up
go to work late
sleep in the car

I'm far away now

I leave everyone
without a warning

until you realize
I'm missing
you notice

wake up early
I'm alone
far from everyone
I use to know

Now I don't recognize myself

If you love me let me go
It's told
I don't need you anymore
the rain passed away
sunshine coming in
If you loved me
go away
It's said
you don't need me anymore
if we can't let go of each other
we'll hurt
it hurts
I want to become dust

If you tell me
I'll let you

these walls don't belong to me anymore
It doesn't matter

open the fridge
pick your poison
don't you hear the water running
don't open the faucet
you smell like shame
you look like the sadness I try to escape
close your eyes and fall asleep
wake up far away from me
in the mornings I can barely breathe
tell everyone to look away
hide my face
they pick a side
they walk away
I trust no one
who says they love me
no one will ever know me
go back inside
I love goodbyes
I hate to see her come
if she calls for me
I'll run
close your mouth love
I hate to see you poison yourself in the afternoons

I'm so tired
so are you

paradise go
let's go

I'm so sleepy
you are too

let's sleep
paradise go
let's go

you planted flowers in my heart
I'm in full bloom
I hope this feeling doesn't die too soon

I'm a bit dangerous when I smile
you always look away when I say the truth

thinking I'm not talking about you

I'm feeling upside down

whispering
the young are loved

I'm a little lonely
I'm feeling lovely

playing mind games
you smoke and drink
I follow your footsteps

having a little fun

whispering
the young are loved

now you love me so much
send me hugs and kisses

I can't hear the rainfall
my eyes are getting smaller

I'm feeling so young

you make me 21

following your steps
we only fall deeper

this darkness never ends
holding hands

send me hugs and kisses
there's magic in your kind of fun
a spell I'm under

when I fall back into reality
I'm reminded it's a curse

Cause I'm so in love
Forbidden
Know you'll never get it
I'll just disappear into the night
I'm so in love
Betrayal
Don't care
Having to wait
Hurts a heart
Find me
Where stars blossom
In a nebula
In pink skies
In a blank page
bigger than these bones
I'm not in my head
Feeling so far away
It's like my soul went for a walk
Trying to call it back in
Knowing it's too far
So far

Him & I
feels like a universe
separates us
apart

hug away the emptiness
smiling to all the ghosts

what's your favorite time
of day

when the sun gleaming
or the moon is bleeding

it's the moment
the sun is down

the world turns blue
the sky
sky blue

disguised as morning

the night creeping up

then you stay up
and the world turns blue
sky blue

the sun coming up

disguised as night

I'm just out of my body

no one is looking
no one is ever listening

lately
I need to squint

closer the closer I get
I should go

I'm starting to see all my flaws
so I take my glasses off

I've been up and down
you pull me back
I'm trying to leave

lately
I'm start to realize
everything that's wrong
will I change or stay the same

I know we were friends
this distance is killing me
I have no patience to wait for you

I liked him
he was so transparent
could never hide away
I would always find him

all these pretty faces
I can't fake it
if I give you my name
will you take it

lately
in my timeless bedroom
the silence feels peaceful
I'm alone I'm okay

I want to reach out and talk to you again

finding a constellation months later
Hope you're living well

I'd wait forever
to talk to you again

If I ever see you again

like a faint star
you have to look close enough

I'll find you again
without the light blinding me

a little homesick
every day I open my eyes
looking up
these are unknown walls

I miss my favorite mug
the loud music next door
small birds coming into my room
pigeons running on the roof

somewhere
nothing is wrong

when I go back
feel so sleepy
so quiet

don't let me stay for long

Do you love me now?
I'm everything you ever wanted

hard to dream of life
when all I wished for is death

sweet darkness
stealing my breath away

can't make a picture of the future
I keep painting the past

if I stand in the rain will I wash away
can I evaporate

I could be a beautiful cloud

there's so much life
very little time

collecting the puzzle pieces
of myself

I love my bed
I love your smile
and the scent of your perfume

We will fade

I know time moves past us
You will fade

Like clouds after a storm

And when the world sleeps

I will fade

Leaving me behind

I've never met anyone
walk by my side

We fade
into the smoke
of our pain

Dust in the wind
I can hear you go

I don't want it
I've sacrificed my life


I'm fading

As long as I see you smile
I'll be okay

my words are not like yours

can I wake you up?

you tell a sad story
everyone wants a hug

the stars don't cry
I can't catch the shadows in the corner of my eye

will you turn the lights off

is it late enough

I want to ask you everything

saying nothing
feels so safe

I'll die with all my secrets

one day I'll leave it

take me around and around
you don't listen to a word
the sound

come onto me
I don't want to listen
move around me

I don't want to be

stop taking me to places I feel so empty

all you do is sit next to my skeleton

call me
still I feel more distant

I'm not your compass
you can't carry me around
to use me when you're missing

leave / leaving me feeling / down / down

the more I try and speak
I only get shut off

treat me like paper

burn me into ashes

Hold a star in my hand
I'm hoping the moon takes a glance

Wish I could erase my love for you

Nothing will change my love for you

It's all for you to take
I'll give it all away

When the night ends
the star in hand will sleep