he's got a heart
and I want it all

he hides it in plain sight
he's like sunlight
burning my skin

all I see is red
all I hear is him

I'm calling out your name
I'm waiting for you to do the same

I know you'll never love me
I'll be here forever
if you change your mind

I see your face everywhere
I hear your name all the time

I'm calling out your name
expecting the same

I'll die
hoping you realize
I'm the one

You don't care about me
That's okay
Because the day I stop
You'll wish you did

You've loved me this whole time
I see the light
I can touch the clouds

The burden I carried
has fallen from my shoulders

Why haven't you blinked
Why don't you say anything

You hurt me

Wish I could say I hate you

I can't hate you even if I tried

I'm the light
I'm the dark
I'm the one you'll never understand

I found a secret in plain sight
It's getting colder

Cigarettes
Can you keep a secret
Will you hold it

no not today
not tomorrow
maybe someday
or never again

you told your friend
we're just friends

I lost my black shirt
at your house

you left your grey hoodie
in my room

- -            - -            - -

There's no going back

the feelings are lost

if you ever want your stuff back

I can give you back your heart

the street we use to walk every day
is empty

the star we named
disappeared

-
sad songs play every day

I loved you in the smallest ways
you pushed me
I wanted to live
wake up to your face


I know you'll say
stay

remind me how your love felt
in the mornings

waking up in an embrace

I don't remember anything

You say you love me
but do I love you

In the night
When you lay alone
I'll love you

Sometimes birds look like black stars
In the morning sky

I have a feeling
you don't know what is love

scared for my life
scared of falling asleep and you'll finally realize

the girl everyone sees isn't me
she's not me
I'm living in this strange body

I'm  afraid to reveal myself
the real me

you don't know that girl

completely different

I hope you still love me

My words are like blankets
covering my true feelings and meaning

can I get a heart
can I have it without getting hurt

I never say what I feel
no one ever tells me how I feel

My words are injected with my silent pain and quiet cries

They're blankets covering what you'll never find

I have an empty smile
half filled heart

I feel most weak at night
when I have no one to hold

If this is my weakness
out of many
I'll find

I am most beautiful when vulnerable
my tears feel like glass
cutting away the left over loneliness

Crying can you hear
My face is wet and I'm hurt
but I love you too

I want to give you my happiness
My heart and the little love it contains
I want you to have my smile

Keep my joy
Save my youth

I'll give it all to you

I want you to have my eyes
my visions

My words
my stories

I need to give you a hug
please feel warm

If this is love

I'll give it to you all
- - -

I cried my eyes out for you too

I take out my heart
before I sleep
to let me breathe

It's almost funny
how I'm hurting
months later

This is what I deserve
for being a robot last year

Putting my feelings on hold
I feel no change at all

The world with all its beautiful colors

Hurting my eyes
I can't breathe right

To see the beauty
is to feel pain

I want to love someone
with a rainbow
in my eyes

Even if I go blind

It seems like all the roses I know
are beautiful
with words

I can't get to sleep
will you be with me

I can't close my eyes
will you talk to me

can't get
can't
can't get to sleep tonight

if you're right next me

looks like another endless night

I could give you the
world the stars the moon the sun
you give me nothing

today I took a shower and tried to remember how my life felt months ago

then I got out of the shower and realized I can't remember nor ever go back
to recall how I felt then

suicide is dressed in white
they tell you
come with me into the light

It's always too late
when you realize
you're never coming back

I often cry alone
that's all I've known

hide your feelings

with many years alive
I still don't understand what it's like to love

there are days I can't see the sun

I can't feel warm

I stay up until dawn
hoping to find the sunrise

If I could get the things I want
Just give me what I need

There's always everything and nothing

I wanted to be the sky
with you beside me

Pink clouds
pink flowers
around

I'm sorry I never bothered returning

- - -

waiting for the right time
the perfect second

I have no understanding

I always stay quiet
no sound

I have no dreams

The stars aren't enough
I want a full moon
I want all of the pieces

I'm filled with blank pages

Ripped apart

Break my mind
Triggered by the city lights

- - -

I disappear
clouds covering me up

I vanish
into the wind
hear me then

With a whisper

I'm not complete

- -
Will I ever be
- -

Loving me is loving a half moon
I could never give myself fully to you

I realize I'll never be your first choice or priority

sleepy eyes
wide awake
the night feels
hidden behind shadows

I can hear your messages come in
I can hear your heart race

Is it for me ...

is this too sweet
will your heart then melt for me

you're my starry daydream
I love you

--

I need you

if you go
please don't leave me alone

I've finally let go

I finally learned to love

I want you

---

I love you

everyday
every night

I want to sleep peacefully
wake up in the morning

will I ever be enough for you

learn to be quiet
sleep early

will you ever talk good about me

walk away
be stronger than the other person

I can't be warm enough
with your cold heart breathing
killing us gently
loving you delicately

no matter how many months go by
no matter how many nights come to life

every time you look into my eyes
you see my mistakes

I'll never be able to erase

ruined youth I wanted the world
I never got anything

I want everyone to love me
I crave your love

hurry into the sunshine
don't stay inside

come in during the night

blind to the dream
falling into zero

I don't believe you miss me

I'm killing me softly

whenever I think of you
I miss the old you

hurry

the fire is dying

I feel so lonely

I'll never tell you

I'm missing your words today
I miss your presence too

I need this sadness
this anger
to remember
all the pain I've gone through

don't you go and hide
I'm still bleeding out
from everything I've lost

covered in dust
from the ashes
of my lost lover

felt like I'd never recover
but I still miss her

as the months went by
I forgot about you gradually

I still try
and hope to see you one last time

go back in time
love you one last time

one last time

to do everything right

it's so hard
to live without

you're burning out

stay

- - -

I was the one who left

I wish I had been told to stay

Keep on saying
that you've burned all the bridges

you jumped down
hit your head

Please help me
like I did

You've left me alone again
Drive into the city

Please don't forget about my heart
My head doesn't sleep
I dream about you some days

You're breaking down
I'm always there when you're at your lowest

So please understand
that I'll need you
when I'm drowning

My demons tell me to close my mouth
or else they'll come out

I haven't spoken a word
writing down everything is much safer

I've seen people question my existence
telling me if I lie everyday
Who's the real me

What's your name

I have multiple versions of myself
I'm always someone else
depending who you are

What's your name

I don't have a age
Its just my soul

I'm only a ghost

I'm the monster under your bed

The real me lies inside my head
She watches tv all day

I Plug in a charge to my wrist
for tomorrow's energy

I spit out fire when I'm angry

I tell my demons to be quiet or out
They'll have to move somewhere else

I've spoken almost about everything

Now everyone is scared to be my friend

I'm scared to look at the sky
and forget how to breathe

you're overflowing
with words

trying to sleep

wish you could stop
if only I could close your mind

I still see the younger you
you're still lost in my eyes

have you ever stayed up till 12 in the afternoon

your mother doesn't really love you

he believes in no one
in nothing

empty faith

I pray you'll change

your presence feels warm
as the sun

every cloudy day
I'm missing your face

hold hands
sometimes

you're only an echo
in my head

I whisper a flower goodnight
before cutting it apart
its petals kissed gently

the veins in the ocean
twist with mine

I've thought a thousand ways to die
without ever finding a successful life

Catching blue stars
flying in the night
leaving a trail of celestial dust

My reflection has become a shadow

I feel shallow

The water isn't too deep
It's blue far away
but faded green close enough

lights follow me everywhere
the moon staring at me in the afternoon

In the middle of it all

Trying to love it

I say I'm not afraid of dying

My heart aches
every time I lie to myself

Have you lost your faith in love
broken heart

Nothing like a dead rose
to make me feel lonely

baby you're not here to hold me

Dark thoughts
in loud crowds


Cloudy skies
warm rain
reminds me of your last kiss

I've lost faith in all
without you

I want to reach out and talk to you again

finding a constellation months later
Hope you're living well

I'd wait forever
to talk to you again

If I ever see you again

like a faint star
you have to look close enough

I'll find you again
without the light blinding me

Over the moon
At 00:00

I'll let go
If you go first

I want to go
waiting
lights blinking

sleeping in the afternoon
I'm ready to let go

I took a picture of the sky
forgot you're not in my contacts

Do you know
What I know
Do you know

I feel like I'm going down in a spiral
dark black hole
taking me to the day where we first met

leaving it behind me
traveling far

do you know how I feel
what I feel
do you know

Travel all night
the morning must come by
I want to kiss the moon goodnight



--------

Let go

I'd wait forever for the sunrise
laying under the dark moonlight

I could love you forever
If we're meant to be together

Waiting for you to realize
now to pass by

I see the rain from far away
clear mind

I'd wait forever to the sunrise
with you on my mind

under the black sky

If were to see a glimpse of the sky
Maybe I could breathe fine

we don't know

how to be grateful
how to be loved

talking behind your back
silent
talking really bad stuff

could you give me a hand
I'll give it back
when I can

I'm so tired
of life

overthinking the night

they don't know what its like to reach the end of the tunnel
without a glimpse of light

it's best not to ask anyone for favors
nor tell them your problems

how dare you disrespect me
remember the first day you met me

all the days I watched you cry
the days I made you laugh

the times I was there in your loneliness
have you forgotten

now I'm just someone you turn away

no love to hold

how dare you reject me

I use to be your everything

have I become your nothing

We could love
if you knew how to love

I could comfort you
If I was taught how to

no one ever loved me

I kiss the mirror
to many days

I pose for the picture

I'm not afraid of the dark
Nor the cold

I've suffered
survived the desert
numbing winters

A broken heart
lost home

I'm not afraid of the dark

I find my home
in the shadows

I talk to the monsters

With a pretty angel face
everyone thinks you're okay

Crippling
rotten
insides

I'm on the run
looking for pure blood
tonight