writing letters
I can never give

if I could so easily
say the words to you

would you run far away
or come closer

I try to remember everything about you
everything we did
remind myself you exist outside my dreams

when I met you
it felt like we knew the ending before the start

this friendship
is a disguise

all the feelings I can't admit
three words together make no sense

what's on your mind
I can't tell you what's on mine

disconnected
are we still best friends

I can be isolating
you're away in unknown places

trying to find new love
even if you cross my mind

tempted
and delusional

hoping we find our way back together
I can't find someone better

you're the worst of all
no one hurts me like you

you're so unloving
leave me wanting more

more and more till
I crumble apart

keep to myself
don't ever give up

crack my heart open
I have to leave you
you'll love me after I go

I spent valentines day alone
you didn't say happy birthday till she said so

you didn't ask about my purple hair
I know you don't care

I've been thinking about you
spinning in my head
dizzy in a waltz

my dreams are all about loving you
then I wake up to loathe you

forcing my eyes open
cover the hole in my heart with a band aid

hurts more to know
you don't want to let me go
kills me to know you don't want me at all

come find me
I'll let you go
I can finish us off

you can put all the wind in a bag
send it my house
so it doesn't bother you anymore

you can hate me for months
love me after
come back when I've forgotten

it's hard to say
i love you so much
why is it so hard to
express what I feel

if you tell me something small
something big
I'll remember

I still have trouble falling asleep
you don't care
taking more pills
nothing works anyways

is it too late
to say
how much you mean to me

does it mean nothing now
is all my love meaningless

you can't forget me
I'll always think of you

till it hurts
one day it won't

I'm too ashamed
and filled with regret
to say
I miss you

It's too late to say
sorry
too late to say goodbye

everything I wish I had said
eats me up at night

I can't say it
I'm so disappointed in myself

but I must admit
I miss you a little
just a tiny bit

you know I miss you
you know I think about you
because I erased every bit of you

I threw all the pieces
I didn't want to remember
the memories are hard to get rid of
a dark stain inside my mind

can't wash you out
it's not enough
to runaway

don't tell anyone
but I still think about you months later

you should know
I erased you from everything

I can still find you inside my heart
through the thin cracks

peeking through
go down

can't say sorry now
there's no going back now