sick of hiding in myself
shutting up
holding things in
i wanna cry in an open field
i wanna cry out, not cry in
i wanna not mind the watching eyes
let me be
let me be, self

so much so that
when you involve yourself
in relationships,
they cannot would not could not
force their own persons
in you
because you are very much filled
with your own.

I'm 19 and have never loved
Have been loved? I can't be too sure
Sometimes, I like to look around
Watch closely the people around me
And just really wonder if I have met
Someone who can go the opposite way as I
Someone I will forget at one point
But whose end of the cords will still be up
For rekindling, for reliving
Because there is still much to kindle and live on
Even after a long while of thinking
(Probably amounting to 30 years)
"There's not much in here for the both of us anymore"