Relationships and solitude:
they are just two sides of the same coin.  
I aim to flip the coin and find
the balance in every outcome
and each side the
coin may fall.

Of all that I know,
of all that I have seen,
you are the only thing that shines
and the one that gives me life.
Nothing is as pure as you
and as long as you exist,
there is still hope.

My memories are
like dissonant wind chimes-
they shriek every time
my mind's winds blow.
Those familiar tunes still haunt me
and to this day they remain
stuck in my head.

I hope the fragments of me
left behind in your heart will
continue to make you smile
while I am gone.

When trauma
punches holes in your heart,
we find ourselves seeking reassurance
and validity to plug those holes
so that love cannot
leak so easily.

My heart is a
sanctuary of silence,
a place where few have ever glimpsed.
The demons may try to penetrate its walls
but this heart has always proved stronger
than what I gave it credit for.

You should aim to be
kind and loyal but not at
the cost of yourself.

4:18 PM
23/3/24

If you know me by my writing,
be prepared to know me by my silence,
for the demons from within and beyond
have choked the voice out of me.
I don't want to speak anymore,
I only watch and
I write.

Everything will be
okay just as long as I
get to call you mine

3:49 PM
22/2/24

Still in between
waking up on a
crisp Sunday morning and
these dreams of you.

Truly, my favorite
time of the week.

Isn't it funny how
the days, weeks, months
never seem to change,
but looking back,
the years never
feel the same?

My soul's melody
can still be played but
it is missing your voice.
It is still pleasant to listen to
but without your harmony,
I will forever sing alone.

You make me feel like
'Dreams' by Fleetwood Mac on a
fresh Sunday morning

11:19 AM
4/2/24

What is worse:
the ending or forgetting
how to begin again?
We have a choice not to
give into the destruction and despair
or rebuild from the ruins of
what came before.

You are my chai-
there is nothing as sweet
or as warming as you.
I need you every morning
to get me through the day
and each night to grant me
the sweetest of dreams.

When I think about the adventures,
the laughs, the meals, the memories,
the highs and even the lows,
I am always left with a smile
and heart full of JOY.
No matter the season,
no matter the country,
I will be your friend,
partner and lover in every
adventure, hardship and celebration
we shall face together.
Your life and your soul
is a spark of inspiration and
your smile sets my heart ablaze.
If you continue to warm me,
I will continue by your side
whether it be at home or
a land so far away-
I will continue to support you
and spoil you in every
way that I can.

If I were given the choice
over a thousand sunflowers
or an endless field of lavender,
I would choose your smile
every time.

I want to
drink from your
lips as if you were
an oasis in
the desert.

As the stars come out each night,
as do my thoughts of you
the way they set my skies ablaze
in your beauty and every
memory we shared.

When you smile at me,
the sun inside me ignites
and the flowers of
my heart bloom.

The only one who
feels with me is me-
all the joy, the pain,
and everything in between.
Those tears and those smiles
only reach my face and
its my burden to carry.
This is my solitude and it is
all I have ever know.

How lonely is the
writer who sinks into the page
as they pour their mind into their words
only for no other soul to
witness their art?

I close my eyes and
suddenly, I am there,
in the memories I try to forget,
where I lost my heart and
have been trying to
reclaim it since.

I love you more
than the milky way
on a clear summer night.
For me the universe only
exists in your eyes.

Learn to separate
the blue from the skies
from the blue in
your heart.

I will always
look for you with my eyes
just as I will always
long for you with my heart.

Treat your mind as if
it were your garden.
Be careful with who you
make memories with so that
you can plant seeds rather
than pollute what is good.
Indeed, memories are forever
and not the people so make sure
you keep out the locust to keep
your garden a pretty place
to return to.

Being happy and
being distracted from sadness
are not the same thing.

Does your smile
bring you as much joy
as the thought of
yours brings me?

Another year,
another roller-coaster
around the sun
and all its highs and lows.
Some of us were left nauseous
while others chased the thrill,
daring to ride another year.

Do not trust those
who do not converse with
their demons once in a while,
let alone, those who ignore
or deny their existence.

It was in the
heart of winter where
I found, within me,
a radiant sun.

I do not wait for you,
but I am all you have and
all you will ever know.
I can distance you from people,
but I can also bring you together.
I can heal wounds and I
can open up old scars.
I am time.

It is too easy to decorate
yourself with plastic flowers when
the gardens of your heart
has withered.

Stay in the sadness
until you are comfortable
to put it away

1:52 PM
16/12/23

Sometimes it's okay to disassociate,
to tune out the world and be sad.
Go for a walk, put on some music,
do what you need to do
to ease the pain.
Remember,
there is no rush
for this is what it means
to be human.

The demons never really leave,
they only slumber in the
dark corners of the mind.
They do not leave,
do not let them fool you,
they will hide and wait for the
right moment to wreak havoc upon
the soul once again.

To live a good life,
to stay fulfilled and alive
is to keep you in this heart
at all times.

I can still feel your presence
through distance and time,
through the tears and the smiles,
and through the darkness and light.

****, is it December already?
I've only just caught up
on all these feelings,
these changes and
days flown by.
They have all come and
gone like a stranger-
and now it is ending.

We move on from
most souls we embrace,
But the ones that got away,
they are never really gone.
There they remain,
Roaming in the
distant cosmos
of our hearts.

Knowing that you are
loved is what keeps this heart beating.
I hope you know just how cherished you are
and how many smiles you bring to so many people.
I think I speak for everyone when I say
what a difference you have made in so many lives
and that we will be forever grateful.

Sometimes the only
logical thing to do is
forget and move on

4:06 PM
4/12/23

In this heart,
I keep the memories
we share so far and I
nurture them every single day.
I hope we can add more to this heart one day
but until then I am content knowing
that you are happy and loved
and making your own memories.
As for me, I can open this heart
and recall the way you smile.
Indeed, there is nothing more beautiful
than you and our memories will
stay in this heart forever until
the next one we create.

Depression is a black cat
stalking you throughout the day,
quietly lurking in the shadows,
never knowing when it will strike.

Isn't it ironic
how it is out of fear
for losing someone that stops us
from attaining them.

There is so much joy
in the way you smile,
in those eyes and in
the way you see the world.
I could listen to you all day and
every word I will keep in my heart.
You really are a miracle
the way you bless my life with
your words, your smile
and your love.

I am so submerged in solitude
that I longer feel the need to resurface.
I have found a home at the bottom,
in desolation and darkness.
I do not need those above,
nor do I want to belong to a
sun that scorched me so
very long ago.

I want someone who
knows the silence of my soul.
Yes, we will build our lives
from a sweet silence that
only we can understand.

What if a dream
of someone is bought on
by that person thinking
about you?