For the past 19 years
My heart has been dormant.
The cobwebs of loneliness and longing
Make intricate patterns around its bruised and beaten frame.

It runs on little,
With inconsistent beats that continue my breathing.
This heart is rather cold
From endless nights and dragging days
I fear for my heart
For it is hungry.

And it will take any opportunity it can get
At the first sight of affection
To feel something, anything at all.

The mad beat of blood
pounding inside me
in firelit sands
the rush of ocean waves
I close my eyes
And lose myself to my body
moving as if hypnotized
like some ancient charmed snake
"Oh, the Devil makes us sin,
but we like it when we're spinning..."
out of control
as we bend time against its will
in one cyclical beat
slow it down
I open my eyes
And there you are

standing still
in this sea of bodies
And I am pulled towards you
like moon and tide
like some unknown magnetic entity
my eyes draw you near
"Because we like it when we're spinning..."
skin to skin
warm breath on my neck
eyes aflame
to this beat of lust lust lust
thank the Devil for this sin
again... Oh!

I have not triumphed over armies or doubts,
I have not gone into battles with cries and
finished with victory,
I am not a chess master
I am not epic,
I can play no instrument, or have perfect pitch
I have no treasured wisdom at my call,
no deep pool from which to draw,
I am not epic,
I have not ran into chaos or darkness,
not knowing what my chances are,
of being epic,
because, I am not,
my faith is at times like mustard
without the seed,
watered down, not epic,
I do not ride a stallion,
or have tigers as my beasts,
I have a dog, aging as fast as she walks,
we are not epic,
I can not unleash an arrow from any bow,
with accuracy, but I can say, the fights
I have fought, I can count on one hand,
and none were epic, maybe mistakes,
I did not sacrifice my friends lives or mine
to save a princess, the queen or the Land,
I have not fought dragons,
or black forces of night
I am not epic,
I have never received near fatal wounds,
I have not stepped in front of an arrow,
meant for someone else,
that would epic,
and I am not epic...yet.

I am filled with joy
Because God has forgiven
All of my dark sins.
...

I am the jellyfish that sits
in the bloom of your waters,
looming my lines across your ocean
motioning you towards my toxicity.
I'm water, I'm water
Simplicity.