Don't mind me
As I sit here drool free
Opting out on the hysteria

From the latest rage
On today's Climate Change
I find it a shame it's not clear to ya

All of the hype
Accented with baby cries
The world is soon again going to end

I've heard all this before
20 to 30 years ago
Where even back then they told us 10

Sure we need to take
Care of it all for all of our sake
But this about amounts to mental cruelty

Where we're scaring our kids
Saying kiss it goodbye, this is it
Blaming you and me without skipping a beat

It used to be we're all going to freeze
Wait...scratch that, they meant overheat
Till they threw in the towel and called it Climate Change

That way they can cover it all
Be at heavy rains or freezing snow
Makes it easier to go either way

So please don't mind me
As I sit here drool free
Opting out on the hysteria

From the latest rage
On today's Climate Change
I find it a shame it's not clear to ya

I've made a mess of this life
Which has me wondering why
I get it so wrong
When I don't even try

I just wake up and do
Without a single clue
This being about the only thing
That I follow through

I've looked forward and back
Double checked all the facts
I've made a mess of this life
Which has me smack-dab where I'm at

I've made a mess of this life
Without once thinking twice
If I could do it again
I'm sure again I would find

That every time
With no reason nor rhyme
Try as I might with all of my might
I'd make a mess of this life

You've been the constant beside me
The comfort inside of this daily wild sea
That pushes and pulls the blue of my soul
The forever peace to my needs

You've been the flowering fragrance
The treasure that says you can keep it
The silver and gold to all that unfolds
The first dawning of light come to greet it

You've been the miracle in the making
The gift of the day for the taking
The stronghold of hope that never let's go
The grace that is made for the saving

You've been the goodness inside of the deed
To perfect tone to my phones loving ring
The fine tooth comb to comb out my alone
You've been the constant beside me

i built my heart
out of salvaged straw and paper
lit a match where the headlines read
it burned much hotter than expected

i then built my heart
using discarded sticks and stones
which in the long run broke my bones
and your words they still did hurt me

it is then I built my heart
out of hardened brick and mortar
windowless it is kept
a heart of brick as thick as this

i look at you
and see a loon
absent from the bin

humming to
a crazy tune
somewhere off in wonderland

this speeding elevator
see you later alligator
short of a few floors

as you gargle
your loose marbles
insanely spilled out on the floor

the loose screws
used to tighten you
are all stripped of their thread

while the voices that
you laugh with
are all inside your head

leaving the thoughts that
you often build with
short of a few bricks

which leads me back
to where this started at
you loonie with no bin

What do you do
When there's a contract out on you
Do you blacken your face then run and hide

When the deeds of yesterday
Are today slapped in your face
Then thrown in the trunk and taking out for a ride

You can toss out all bets
When it comes to tolerance
That you ever will see it again

Unless you drain the lake
Of regrets and mistakes
And find it in boots of cement

When tolerance got carried away
In its hey, that's okay
We all make mistakes now and then

Where we're all the same
In those daily mistakes
What happened to live and let live

I may judge you
But don't you dare judge me too
Remember what happened to tolerance

Blindfolded and stuffed
Into a waiting cars trunk
And fitted with those shoes of cement

She knows a thing or two about Life

Has felt the tick inside the sorrow
But then she also knows
How fickle the wind blows
And how it all can change tomorrow
In spite of Life today

She knows a thing or two about Faith

And how it only takes a little
Of its seed to be sown
For it to grow
It may not seem but it's that simple
To come and pull yourself up

She knows a thing or two about Love

And how it holds it all together
Using the softest heart
To play a major part
Handle it delicately with care
It'll all work out just fine

She knows a thing or two about Life

The sun came down
Kissed the Earth good morning
Huged it with a warming
To help it on its way

Gave a gentle nudge
To guide it in it's spinning
Whispered here's to new beginnings
Calling it a day

If everything was perfect
And life was but a breeze
I'm not sure exactly
How that would feel to me

If life was but a song
That we all could hum along
I'm not sure how right that'd feel
If something was not wrong

If everything was right side up
And not a thing was upside down
Would we ever really know
When the good times roll around

Can we take this opportunity
To realize what we should know
How things would not feel right
If something was not wrong

If you're late coming to this party
In the perfection that you seek
How on earth can you be happy
If you never have a need

I believe they both go hand in hand
Never travel far alone
Because right would not feel right
If something was not wrong

Haven't we been here before
As History sits by slack-jawed
Wondering why we haven't learned
Seemingly unconcerned

How many times must it repeat itself
Before we move on to something else
Before we open up our eyes
To see it didn't work the first time

Nor the second nor the third
When to us will it occur
That we should take a different path
One much different from the last

Where the record set of History
Won't skip a beat and then repeat
Again to stand and look slack-jawed
Wondering where it all went wrong

is there any difference
when seen from a distance
of a waves persistence
of hello and goodbye

if love was the matter
the wave might know better
between the sadness and laughter
of hello and goodbye

is there something missing
off in that distance
some meaning hidden
of hello and goodbye

another agenda
that waving will send ya
once you catch the wind of
hello and goodbye

Standing center stage
Ready to give it all away
The comedian removes his coat
Set for a night of killing jokes

A murderer in his own right
Slices and dices with precision knife
At his feet, he draws the chalk line
Funny kills the crowd every time

Although some jokes go over their heads
Some also fall flat a grueling death
He tries to hide the beads of sweat that show
While doing his best at killing jokes

Smothered laughter comes in a can
***** the lid tight on ignorance
Which helps in the making of a comedic list
Writing it down then killing it

From the bloodbath, he takes a bow
Bathes off to the sound of the crowd
Smiles at the rambunctious applause
All from a night of killing jokes

We're all in one frame of mind
To smoothly flow upstream with time
Caught in the middle without a paddle
We've become quite the gaggle
With the water rising high
No way of stopping till the day we die
Can't you see, believe you me
We're all up the creek

So you best hold on to all you own
Finding out, in the end, it was just a loan
Cause nothing is as it seems
The further that you get upstream
You can moan and groan for all you know
There's no way to stop the flow
Hoping to get by with just a squeak
We're all up the creek

How many of us want to just let go
Get pulled out by the undertow
Halfway through this life
And still no paddle within sight
Where's the promise, where's the hope
Where's the life in stories told
As far as I can see
We're all up the creek

i do well in a crowd
talk enough to earn my keep
my opinions i spout a bit too loud
but then again that's just me

i've not done myself any favors
as i hide behind it all
i've tried my luck at ordering out to lunch
but the order is much too tall

being the sound that's made
with a one-hand clap
as a matter of fact
i'm a one man band

it's not quite as simple as
cymbals, drums, guitar
when your hands are kept so busy that
you have to wonder who you are

when you can lose yourself in that crowd
on fire with gasoline  
starting out down for the count
before you even make the scene

being the sound that's made
with no slap on the back
as a matter of fact
i'm a one man band

no one sees the one true me
nor comes to the show
on the run, i've seen them come
but mostly seen them go

i've got a sound that often puts me down
rightly in my place
making it hard to see to find me
when you forget my name and can't place my face

being the sound that's made
with a one-hand clap
as a matter of fact
being a one man band

Two lives so young and tender
Yet old enough to know better
If they had only kept her
Would it have really mattered

Would anything have really changed
Would what is right still have turned away
Letting evil grab hold her hand
Leading her down the road of the ******

Would those that kindly took her in
Be thrown out as next of kin
For all the hell in what they did
The rapping of the innocent

Would the angels still stand and cry
At the evil in their sight
Would they know to pose the question why
The sin of man is piled so high

Would they see her cope with this life on loan
From man to man from home to home
This Child of God now fully grown
By His Grace come into her own

To follow along a different path
One she and her son can draw the map
To know for sure where they are at
Finally on the final path
In what is right, right where they're at

I've got all of this
And even more of that
Yet still I'm working on the list
Of all I lack

You'd think that I'd be happy
With just some
But to tell the truth, sadly
There is never enough

I save the Knicks and the Knacks
Along with everything else
Proud of the dust that they collect
On the many shelves

What hidden pleasures are hoped to find
In this crazy elbow rub
We all know I would be lying
There is never enough

All I can get if not more of it
To fill this insatiable need
Where spirits lift as I take a dip
In this pool of insanity

Better safe than sorry
Hoarding all I've got
Anyways, you know the story
There is never enough

With this,
My last Will & Testament
I'm sure you're all here
To see what you get

I know you're excited
To see the treasures I had
Now that I'm gone
Now that I've passed

To split it up evenly
Only seems right
Cuts down on the cussing
Stops all the fights...

I leave behind my disappointments
And all my regrets
Along with the projects
I never finished

Plus all the days
That I never did
With the buckets of tears
I cried over them

You can keep the guilt that I felt
When things would go wrong
Whether or not
It was my fault

Take the attitude
Of what's in it for me
And do as you please
Now that I'm free and no longer in need

Oh and my fits of rage
When things would not go my way
Be careful with that
And watch what you say

Fill free to keep the jealousy
Of why them and not me
But be warned if you do
Happy you'll never be

And my final breath
That I wish I still had
You can toss that away
Now that I'm dead

I'm sure you're now thinking that
You should have hedged all your bets
Since your ears and your eyes
Have heard and seen what is left

I'm so glad you all came
To take this all away
That over the years
I should never have saved

...oh and tonight if you are soundly asleep
And suddenly come awake
The noise you hear is just me
Laughing from beyond the grave

from innocence
to what a mess
who would have thought
who could have guessed

the worst in life
would pile this high
with troubles that
some people find

you can choose
to win or lose
what you do
is up to you

take the hate
as your fate
or learn in love
to give away

giving innocense
a second chance
this side of life
hand in the dance

those who know
can't help but grow
past the past
into the hope

and overcome
the trash that's thrown
at the innocence
of the young

till there's no secrets that
are ever kept
when it comes to
young innocence

I woke up this morning
To quite a surprise
I had a 42 chest
And round shapely thighs

The hair on my face
Had been replaced
With voluptuous lips
And rosy red cheeks

Guess all the dreaming of women
That I always do
Went straight to my head
And changed a thing or two

I went to the mirror
As every man would
And thought to myself
That I look pretty good

So I searched my wife's closet
Found a little red dress
Nothing to fancy
But enough to impress

Off of the hanger
I pulled it down
Then headed out the door
For a night on the town

Dinning and dancing
In all the places I'd been
I break a few hearts
Cause I don't really like men

I tried to explain
That I woke up this way
Neither delusional nor crazy
And certainly not gay

I'm just thinking I think
Of women most all the time
It must have swirled in my head
Till my body fell into line

I'm not really sure
What I'm going to do
But enjoy being pretty
For a moment or two

Just when my wife
Was warming up to the idea
I woke up again
But this time back to a man

The one thing I learned
Out of all this craziness
Is I look good in red
So I'm keeping the dress

I wonder who's the Puppeteer
Who pulls all the strings
Do they have charge of the world at large
Or just this one country

Is it done for the love of money
Or the power that it holds
Is it shoot to **** for the thrill
Until they fill they're needs and wants

What goes on behind the curtain
Do we really want to know
And if we knew for certain
Would we still come to the show

Tangling you and me in their strings
Befuddled in the motion
As the Puppeteer leaves us hanging
Without us even knowing

Do they tug on us more than once
Strings wound tight in every matter
Wish us luck we're all in the clutch
Of the Puppet Master

Now you see me
Now you don't
Looks like I'm here
But I'm really not

I wander off
From time to time
Take my thoughts
Leave the rest behind

As I sit here
And blankly stare
With a silly smile
Not a single care

I make my way
From day to day
From the here and now
To the far away

That's why you see me
But you really don't
I may appear to be here
When I'm really not

There are people over here
That don't like people over there
Though they've never met
Here, there, or anywhere

They're told the way they are
By people, they don't know
Which makes me rather sad
For the world as a whole

We sit inside a box
Our little happy hippie pad
Liking it or not
It's where they like us kept

You can drool on it for days
What's wrong with society
It's all in what you make
All up to you and me

Because the people over here
Are like the people over there
All we need do is meet
Here, there, or anywhere

when all the words have been taken
and all the thoughts given away
that is when you'll hear me saying
i will kindly be on my way

when there is no more ink worth dipping
with paper parched in yellow dust
when all ideas end up missing
when the feeling i once had is lost

that's when i'll pack what little i have left
and say goodbye to all i know
what good is poetry to me if i can't seem
to compose another poem

here
we
are
another
day
another
day
to
give
away
everything
that
you
have
saved
just
like
every
other
day

They give it in a whisper
Throw it out in a shout
Hoping you will listen
To the words, they spout

We all have our own opinions
Whether or not you need
Yet the only time we listen
Is if with me you agree

We've lost the art of compassion
Somewhere along the way
Drawing to the conclusion
Can't believe a word they say

The reprobates manipulate
And then call it daily news
Giving away their own brand of hate
In the words, they use to spew

As the Talking Heads spin
And blame the innocent
What happened to compassion
I often wonder where it went

We all have an opinion
That we gladly share
Though if your's is not in line with mine
Your's does not matter

You can see that I ain't faking
I know what I'm speaking of
There's no time that is worth waisting
When you're searching for true love

You can peek around four corners
Open every door that's shut
Hang out at funerals with the mourners
When you're searching for true love

You can build the tallest tower
So you can look from up above
Check your watch every hour on the hour
When you're searching for true love

****************

You'll know when you find the feeling
Of the genie to your rub
There won't be any hidden meaning
When you finally find true love

The emptiness will be leaving
When push comes down to shove
This you best be believing
When you finally find true love

You can hang your coat and cap up
Welcome home buttercup
You've come upon where you've longed to belong
When you finally find true love

Ready or not here he comes
Best you batten down the hatches
Unless you were one of the smart ones to run
Like a crazed hound in July chasing rabbits

Alright, alright, alright
As you turn and face the wind
Open the door to a Category 4
And let Dorian come screaming in

Oh me, oh my, oh my, oh me
Is that Grandma in the yard below
Hanging tight with all her might to the clothes line
With her cat Skeeters wrap around her big toe

This is getting rather exciting
As I see trees by the dozen crack in half
With my Boy Scout skills I might need to later build
A family size raft including the cat if there anything left

But for now we'll all hunker down
Try and stay away from the windows
And all the flying debris that I decided to leave
In the yard scattered amongst the plastic Flamingos

I'm here wondering at this very moment
Which of the two could be worse
The fate of being blown away by a hurricane
Or eaten by a gator face first

Still you've got to love living in Florida
With 20 foot waves crashing to shore
As I step outside to grab that branch floating by
I think I need to start whittling some oars

Would you think differently of me
Would your eyes only for him beg you to see
Someone that's as lowly as me

If I wrote for you a poem

Would you dare to steal a glance my way
Would you listen intently to what I had to say
Would the beat of your heart echo my way

If I wrote for you a poem

Would your night and daydreams be only of me
Let me look in your eyes and dive in where it's deep
Would you do all of this simply for me

If I wrote for you a poem

Would you tell that other guy goodbye
Would you explain to him the main reason why
Would you turn around with a sly smile

If I wrote for you a poem

Would it forever change your direction in life
The way I would like it to change mine
If the answer is yes, I'll start now on the rhyme

Cause I'd love to write for you that poem

This I'm sure most of you know
Cause it's so hard to hide
That my beautiful Cell Phone and I
Have been dating quite some time

It all started off innocent enough
First acquaintances, then close friends
But quickly enough it turned into love
When I asked her to move in

You always see us out to dinner
Even late-night movie shows
In line together we stand holding hands
Me being too afraid to let her go

She's wonderful at conversation
No matter talk or text
She can get my heart to racing
When I see her light up where she sits

With others, I can't be bothered
Outside of this relationship
She's like a powerful drug that I can't get enough
And really have no desire to quit

She's now asleep soundly beside me
Soon to wake up raring to go
Life's not been the same since I gave my soul away
When I started dating my Cell Phone

My mind never thought
Or ever crossed
The dim lit idea
Of me growing old

Until I met you
Those thoughts never knew
To cling to that thought
Of this being true

All I'd ever known
Was being alone
Now I can't wait to be
With you growing old

In mid-June the moon
Took off from the sky
You could hear it sing as it sprouted wings
Then taught itself to fly

Over time it lost the will to light
The darkened side of the world
Topsy turvy in a hurry
Away it twisted as it twirled

It winked a knowing eye at Earth
Blew the Sun a kiss
Telling them both then and there
It certainly would not miss

The crazy side of this cheezy life
Flapping its feathered wings
Never to be seen again
As the sky never did come to an end

Every twist and turn the moon took
It made itself a friend for life
With planets ahead and stars to be met
Colorful Cosmos filling the sky

Visiting spaced out wonders
Finally feeling free
Then woke with a start to a Bowie heart
As it all was a moonage daydream

It all happened so fast leaving it aghast
And was over way too soon
Sometime in mid-June
This dream that held the moon

She's an actress
When it comes to love
Plays it out in black and white
Aren't all actors paid to lie

She puts her
Frosted makeup on
Then practices her lines
She could recite them blind

She's always up
On the big screen
When she's in a crowd
Acting out in smile

She'll have you
Begging her for more
That's just the way it goes
As the credits roll

Cause she's an actress
When it comes to love
Ask her for her autograph
But that is all you'll ever get

Looking down on the crash site
The very spot where we fight
Perfecting on the crash and burn
Lessons given yet seldom learned

Daily sifting through rubble
In search of the once happy couple
The one that held us both so tight
Before we took this nose dive

Ruined lives in mid-flight
Looking down on the crash site
Both of us taking turns
Perfecting on the crash and burn

there are those forever lonely
but are they ever truly alone
inside a crowd, they never stand out
where few can tell and less even know

spending their life on a burner
to the left, far in the back
not a page-turner, slightly above a murmur
forgotten soon after they're met

living a life out that's lonely
can be a hard sell on the soul
with the question raised, if only one day
lonely would let itself go

Bored out of my gourd
With nothing going on
So I thought I'd take the time
To write some thoughts in poem

And mostly what pitter-pattered
Inside this hardened head
Were some things that you could do
When you find that you are dead

If you ask me you could be
The perfect sign holder
No matter what the weather
Be it warmer, be it colder

Plus they wouldn't have to pay
You all that much at all
Just come outside every couple weeks
And kindly dust you off

Maybe a babysitter
For unruly kids
As a reminder to behave
Or they'll end up like this

******* a microphone
And take orders at a drive through
You can't do any worse than the living
Who don't seem to have a clue

Or a parking lot valet
Might just be the thing
I'll get back with you on that
I'm still working out the kinks

When there's a numbing in your noggin
And you've no clue of what to do
Thinking of things inside your head
that you can do while your dead
Could be just the thing that will pull you through

When I look real hard what I see
Is a world that's in cahoots
With that worst that's inside you and me
That we've carelessly let loose

If we had clearly seen it coming
Would we have tried to stop the flow
Or continue to sit, playing ignorant
On the thrown of do not know

Instead of being hateful and hurtful
With no tender thought of love
Can we not try and be more merciful
To those that don't get enough

It's so easy to let the worst escape
From the dark recesses of the mind
Fanning the constant flames of hate
With those who think in kind

Realizing there's a problem
And that we're all to blame
Is going to take every single one of us
To set this record straight

So when we look real hard we'll see
We're not all in cahoots
With the worst inside of you and me
In everything we do

We need to learn to love each other
With the time that we have left
Calling each other sister and brother
And accept the differences

From the moment that we met
There never was a doubt
You looked to me like forever
So I followed you around

And as I got to know you
You never proved me wrong
All you do is living proof
As we move along

On this forever journey
Where the years have all lost count
But that doesn't have me worried
I'll take all that I'm allowed

If the center piece gets tattered
And the edges all but torn
All that really matters
Is we both have held on strong

If wrong was right
Then I'd be right
Mostly every time

If do or die
Was the way to live
Then I'd be doing fine

If problems would
All disappear
Blink and they go missing

If answers came
In sheets of gold
I could not afford to listen

If what I said
And what I did
Were one and the same

Who am I
Trying to kid
It'll never go down that way

Because right is right
And wrong is wrong
Proudly on display

So get a clue
Not as I do
And certainly not as I say

Thinking back to yesterday
The haves, have-nots, the giveaways
The hope we had I'd hoped to face
Looking back on happy days
And how they took a sudden change
Bitter now the way we taste

When you killed the clown in me
****** the joy right out of me
Took pleasure in the first degree
When you killed the clown in me

No evidence was left behind
Of the time we had a life
Your sharpened tools cut like a knife
You bent the rules you spent your dime
You changed my fate with your change of mind

When you killed the clown in me
****** the joy right out of me
Took pleasure in the first degree
When you killed the clown in me

Keep your hands out of my head
Your sweaty palms to yourself instead
If I want ideas I'll consult myself
I'll think real hard till I figure it out

This mind is not on the party line
With the ups and downs it's done it's time
The starts and stops, dings and dips
So keep your hands out of it

Keep your fingers from tickling
The thoughts inside my cranium
From what's been seen to what's been said
From a whole lot of nothing in what little is left

From heavy-handed, as light as you please
My brain can't stand when it's being squeezed
Above a whisper it's no secret kept
Keep your hands out of my head

For being there through thick and thin
For holding out on giving

For softening up my hardened times
Being the crease of love on the face of life

For always being there to care
In a world that wouldn't dare

For being the path running straight
The perfect ending to the day

For your bright shining ray of hope
At the end of my twisted rope

For being the one that always counts
When my number's running out

For being the one place that I
Find comfort when I need to hide

For being the arms opening
When the world is closing in

For being the shallow end for me
When I dive in too deep

For being there in all I do
In all that I put myself through

Thank you

Are we not all cannibals
Tearing each other limb from limb
Where the damage we do far out weighs the cost
Me against you, us against them

Are we now all in a war of words
Collateral damage along the way
Nevermind the facts, mangle the truth
Shooting from the hip with shots of hearsay

Have we lost our grip on kindness
Increasingly giving our souls away
Ignorance of this is all but bliss
The thought of revenge is the thought of the day

Are we now all mere animals
Eager to fight ready to bite
Our nature being the only law
Turn a blind eye, sign of the times

Are we not all ourselves at fault
Experts at placing on each other the blame
Excuses are made whenever we're caught
Cannibals above all when given a name

Adam raised a Cain
Who then killed Able
Who wasn't able
To combat the hatred
Cause it was something
He'd never seen
As hatred then
Only grew on trees

God had to flood
The world with tears
For justice to be done
In the early years
Noah's remanent
Left on the land
While all the rest
Drowned in the sin of man

Moses came
And Moses saw
The hand of God
Hand him the law
Ten to be precise
At His command
To curb the likes
Of this sinful man

Jesus came along
For one and all
Gave his life
On a wooden cross
Sacrificed
For you and me
Where love instead of hate
That day
Grew on that tree

in this rest and relax
the little time that we have
emoting life in a forward move
monday comes one day too soon

with clear memories kept
spilling harshly from our laps
far too fast to catch what we lose
monday comes one day too soon

grabbing at the last days straw
not wanting to let one iota go
from what we'd done to the planned to do
monday comes one day too soon

weekend time is the fastest of rides
minutes wave to seconds pulled out by the tide
no control on the speed that it moves
monday comes one day too soon

If life was perfect
In every way
We'd be bored right out of our gourds
With nothing to complain

No watches to tick away
That you're running late
Or friends who have the need to ask
If everything's okay

No difference to the day
With every day the same
If every day the new day makes
Is perfect in every way

Soon enough though we would find
That not one soul would die
Leaving no alibi
For escaping of this life

With no more sickness
No scraping of the knee
As God is my witness
I think back to boring

Although we could eat all that we want
And not gain unwanted pounds
Running Broccoli and Brussel sprouts
Straight out of every town

There would be no more greed
Or advice given free
No more sympathy
Would find itself in need

What would we find to do
In a world perfectly tuned
If we had nothing to gain
And even less to lose

She often costs more than she's worth
Yet other times the greatest show on earth

She rides me constantly when I do wrong
Then plays up to me like a carnival song

You never know where her mood will swing
She'll close up shop and say it's time to leave

Other times she likes to clown around
With the biggest of smiles that lights up the town

I love her so I must confess
Though I never know what's coming next

She has certainly been a roller coaster ride
A house of mirrors with no one more confused than I

Keeps me laughing and guessing wherever we are
My girlfriend the amusement park..

Just when I think I've seen it
All throughout this  land
They went and upped the anti
On the classic can of Spam

Those with the higher power
The ones that run the show
The Spam men of the hour
In a bunker buried way down low

Have added different flavors
To this meat of mystery
From Teriyaki to Tocino
That's bacon to those who don't speak Philippine

They heat it up with Jalapeno
Helps to liven up the slime
Those bunker boys as they're fondly known
Have really out done themselves this time

Aloha from Hawaii?
Imagine Spam in a Hula skirt
As they pull out the Leis and go all the way
Adding pineapple to those Spam burps

Wait a minute!

Now they have pumpkin in the can of Spam
To spice up the feeling of Fall
Those that don't see Spam as a delicacy
Might be at a loss

Exciting rumors even have it
They're in talks with Oreo
There's no place in this universe
That a good slice of spam won't go

The only thing they need to work on
Is the dipping in the milk
They have yet to solve the problem
Of the massive oil spill

Yes they've taken what the rest of us
Never thought could be improved
Just goes to show what ingenuity
And a touch of crazy genius can do

So don't knock it till you try it
And try it if you must
But remember my friend always save the lid
For afterwards scraping of the tongue