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Mike Hauser Jul 2018
Be the wheel
that's set to turn
The comfort in
the daily hurt
The flame that lights
not the one that burns
Be the lesson
that is learned

Be the hope
and not despair
The helping hands
that show you care
The pleasure ride
that takes you there
Be the truth
inside the dare

Be the answer
to the call
The very reason
for it all
The solid yes
to all the no's
Be the river
that freely flows

Be the kindness
that we need
The encouragement  
that sets us free
The do good
to the deed
Be all this
and all of these
Mike Hauser Mar 2013
There's a calmness to the air of the trailer park
As the dumpster in the back slides to the right
Underneath is where our Super Hero has his lair
And where adventure starts out every night

For years now it's been the same old routine
Belches as he wobbles to his feet
Throws the remote down on the beer stained couch
Scratches his rear at the same time picking his teeth

Yes, the night belongs to Beer Belly Batman
Who spends his time fighting petty crime
From spitting on the sidewalkers to mouth full of food talkers
Putting them back in their place and back in line

Sure he used to be a top notch crime fighter
Evil forces he always did foil
But after years and years of beating crime up
The beating on him has taken its toll

If the neighbors music is to loud feel free to call him
Nothing he likes better than knocking heads of unruly kids
Hey Punk! Pull Your Pants Up! Is his favorite motto...
Giving Super Hero Wedges like nobody's biz

I don't know about you but this much is true
I always feel a little more safe and sound
And sleep that much better at night
Knowing there's a White Trash Super Hero around
Mike Hauser Apr 2016
There's something going on
Between me & the poem
A reason to rhyme
A notion to float
Was it something I read
Something once wrote
That's spinning the time
Between me & the poem

As things continue to grow
Between me & the poem
Call it second sight
A perfect pitched tone
Where it has lead
Or where it's still going
I'm sure we will find
Between me & the poem

I'm holding out hope
Between me & the poem
That I'll find in time
What I already know
In all that's been said
Inside of the fold
With the shedding of light
Between me & the poem
Mike Hauser May 2013
Farmer Jones set out to build a barn
A shelter for his bovine
When the wood started disappearing
A little at a time

The cows were taking it to pasture
On the other side of the dell
Little by little in the middle of night
Hoping Jones wouldn't be able to tell

This plans been festering for ages
At least since some of them were veal
But cows aren't very good at telling time
So how long is really hard to tell

Anyways they know they have a plan
That's what matters when it comes down to it
And what it is they've been planing
Is "Bovine One" The Rocket Ship

This time they're going to the moon
They had a cousin who jumped over it once
But that was so many years ago
And cousin Eddie has long been somebody's lunch

They got the plans out of Science Illustrated
When Carl went in to use the can
The day Farmer Jones stepped out of the house
A little secret the cows are keeping from "The Man"

They know nothing about jet propulsion
So the cows broke down and asked the goat
The smartest of all the farm animals
Another little secret nobody knows

In the process of building they used galvanized nails
The goat said in space regular nails would rust
I never would have thought of that
I guess goats are even smarter than us

When "Bovine One" The Rocket Ship was completed
It was on a Wednesday the count down did fall
The day Farmer Jones noticed his wood was missing
And the authorities were called

As they began to investigate
A bright glow came from over the hill
Still to this day no matter what people say
They don't know what the object was nor ever will

The Rocket Ship is still up there in orbit
With umpteen cows inside
Next time you hear a cow moo, look up cause you too
Could see "Bovine One" as it passes by

Did they ever make it to the moon?
No one around really seems to know
I bet you could get the answer though
If you were to go and ask the goat
Mike Hauser Mar 2015
When you start to crave the rave
That mankind sometimes tosses your way
And you loose sight of the reason why
You do what you do when this first came to light

When it soon becomes your goal to receive the praise of man
Instead of making it more for the gift in hand
It's a problem that's festered from the beginning of time
That spreads like the plague through the heart and the mind

You may try and surrender, raise the white flag
Telling yourself there'll be no more of that
Still in the heat of the battle you take the enemies hand
And once again crave the rave of man
Mike Hauser Jun 2013
I've dated poets most of my life
So I could talk back and forth in rhyme

Sounds a bit  odd to some I know
But it helps with the conversations flow

That is where my mind is at
Poetry in every breath

Speak to me in hyperbole's
Sure fire way to get what you please

Sweet imagery entices me
Otherwise I may not have seen*

It helps to shine a different light
*When you date poets most of your life
Mike Hauser Feb 2016
On this road there's many paths
As many rights as there are lefts
With street names like Wandering Day
And Restless Nights along the way
How many times has this vagabond been
On the road of "Don't Go There Again"

There's an empty house on the cul-de-sac
With people in but they're without
Where there never seems to be enough
Welcome to new America
Knock if you like, you're welcome in
Into the house of "Don't Go There Again"

With youth not like back in the day
Innocence packed up tight and shipped away
A crazy attitude to life's demands
How many told they could but find they can't
What's in is out, what's out is in
As we fall in line with "Don't Go There Again"

Your head spins round, completely numb
With your mind being filled with daily junk
You order some sanity on the side
Would you like to up the size
In the drive through line you pull ahead
As they hand you the bag of "Don't Go There Again"
Mike Hauser Aug 2018
Everywhere I go
My rear is there for me
To give comfort when I sit
Should I decide to bend my knees

I take my wife's advice
And keep my cheeks pinched tight
So everywhere I go
My brains don't spill out on the floor
This is an oldie but still rings true to this day! Imagine that!
Mike Hauser Jun 2013
I can't help it, I've got the shakes
I'm back to see the man
He rolls it tight just the way I like
Adds a little extra if I ask

He must have gotten a special order
Isn't that a deeper shade of green
Perhaps from the South of Asia
Where they grow the finest **** across the sea

There's a tingle of excitement
At all the variety
As my man rolls up a little something special
He knows what pleases me

He's got to know just what it does
Measuring the product as I watch
Not speaking a word, the place is silent
The anticipation, almost to much*

My mind and mouth are salivating
The whole table is lighting up
We're all so very happy
*To be having "sushi" again for lunch
Mike Hauser Sep 28
What once kept us warm
We seem to have run from
Which makes me think the gig is up
Put a fork in us, I think we're done

What used to be all smiles
Is overloaded now with frowns
We picked it up only to put it down
Whatever happened to "Happy Town"

Slicing and dicing mincing words
Letting our mouths run off course
Nothing sadder than this soup de jour
Being spoon-fed with pitchforks

We often dream but wake to doubt
In black and white, we find this out
One eighty in our turn around
Whatever happened to "Happy Town"

When did our plans all fall through
Out of our hands, we let them loose
We lost the gander and the goose
******* in knots with a noose

Is it so hard to figure out
All we have is heading south
In line at the slaughterhouse
Whatever happened to "Happy Town"
Mike Hauser Jun 2015
11:45
make sure the straps are tight

11:46
all the time i've spent
wonder where it went

11:47
now
as the sweat beads on my brow

11:48
how did it get this late

11:49
what has happened to the time

11:50
here
how did it so soon appear

11:51
the count down is almost done

how could time be so cruel
11:52

to do this to me
11:53

feel the knocking at my door
11:54

11:55
i ponder life

all the wrong i did
11:56

11:57
now
next stop heaven or hell

for me it's much to late
11:58

11:59
again where went the time

as
12:00**
rolls around
can't help but think about
the horrid way that i lived
when they pull the switch
Mike Hauser Apr 2013
I live in north Florida
That's just a hop, skip, and a jump
From the land known as Georgia
Where "Honey Boo Boo" holds court with her mom

If'n you don't know "Honey Boo Boo"
Your in for a treat or more than one
She's a multi car train wreak
That you can't turn your eyes away from

First let me explain  the state of Georgia
So this family ya'll will understand
Not long ago they re-dirted both paved roads
Said progress was getting out of hand

So with that said and done
And formalities out of the way
Lets turn our attention back to our star attraction
And see what she has to say

Her fame started on Toddlers & Tiaras
Reality shows we all seem to love
From The Crazed Housewives to The Kardashion's
America can not get enough

And since it's on T.V. it's gotta be true
Have you ever tried her drink sensation
Of Red Bull and Mountain Dew, She likes to call "Go Go Juice"
It'll put a hurtin' on you

And who wouldn't want to see a six year old
With that kind of Hellacious Buzz
What goes through my mind when I look at that is
Ahhh, Redneck Motherly Love

So you had better redneckonize her!
If you know what's good for you
Cause a dolla makes her holla!
I'm so glad they've brought back the **** Tube...
Just to set the record straight, I've never seen the show nor do I plan on...
I don't watch T.V. at all...I feel I can waste my time other ways...
And believe me I do!
Mike Hauser Nov 2013
In my ruby red shoes I click my heels
Take out my golden pen
Through transcendental meditation, raise my heart rate up
Putting my head in a cosmic spin

Conjure up a darkened mood
Then brighten it a bit
Oh I almost forgot for luck
I go outside and spit

With a touch of genius (I don't mind saying)
I lay down my first amazing line
Pour over it stroke by brilliant stroke
Then erase it half a dozen times

I go back and rearrange the first line I wrote
Knowing the cosmos would be safer that way
I know because the universe stands on edge
With every word that I display

As I analyze my finished work
Dissecting it line by wonderful line
This time I'm sure like every time before
Another "Masterpiece" is mine

Then I notice the one misplaced word
That changes the entire meaning of what I had to say
I think to myself...Ahhh, "What The Hey!"
Then I go and post it anyway
All in jest my friends...
Mike Hauser Apr 2013
In my ruby red shoes I click my heals
Take out my golden pen
Through transcendental meditation raise my heart rate up
Placing my head in a cosmic spin

Conjure up a darkened mood
Then brighten it up a bit
Oh, I almost forgot for luck
I go outside and spit

With a touch of genius (I don't mind saying)
I lay down my first AMAZING line
Pour over it stroke by brilliant stroke
Then erase it half a dozen times

As I analyze my finished gem
Dissecting it line by enticing line
This time I'm sure like every time before
Another masterpiece is mine

Then I noticed that one misplaced word
That changes everything I had to say
I think to myself...ahhh, "what the heck"
And I post it anyway
All in jest my friends...all in jest
Mike Hauser Aug 2016
I'm getting "It" together
Whatever "It" might be
I'm sitting down and putting "It" now
At the top of my list of needs

Getting round to "It"
Getting "It" done
"It" will be my top priority
With a bullet #1

"It" will be my focus
"It" will be my front page news
Although "It" might have its up's and down's
"It" still I will not lose

So step outside if you ain't ready Clyde
This might hurt a bit
Being the part in life where you don't think twice
Because this my friend is "It"
Mike Hauser Oct 26
They're fighting over here
We're fighting over there
We say that we're concerned
But do we really care
About what all goes on
"Just leave me alone"

Riots in the streets
What's that got to do with me
Waving signs about
Could you keep the noises down
Watch where those rocks are thrown
"Just leave me alone"

Too many now to count
Of people going to Hell
My attitude in that is...
Oh well
It's not like they were not warned
"Just leave me alone"

Babies in the womb
Too often rhymes with tomb
What do you want from me
What am I supposed to do
When I'm warm and safe at home
"Just leave me alone"

People on the streets
With no food to eat
Nowhere to lay their heads
No place to wash their feet
I turn my head and move along
"Just leave me alone"

Just leave me alone
I'm fine by myself
You do what you want
It's not my place to help
How many sing this song
"Just leave me alone"
So many these days sit on the sideline watching the world crumble around them not wanting to get involved...
It's so easy to get ****** into the "Just leave me alone" attitude.
I often struggle with it myself. But in turn, we shouldn't be here to tell others what they are doing is wrong but to help see them through it to a better way.
Mike Hauser May 2013
I've stood on mountains high
Swung the valley's low
Kissed the starry sky
Spoke of what I know

Swam the oceans deep
Walked the desert sands
Calmed the savage beast
Made up my demands

Seen the city streets
In the city's fog
Heard the jungle beats
Coming of the dawn

Conclusions that are drawn
In the dead of night
Point to all that's wrong
A day in the life

Walked the narrow path
The one less traveled on
Seen what it is I lack
A soul that's tired and worn

Heard a distant call
A whisper on the wind
Of what it is I've done
Of where it is I've been

I stood to gain it all
In the latter days
Then I made the call
To give it all away

With a show of hands
Show us where you've been
Show us what you have
Then show us all again

Stood on mountains high
Swung the valley's low
Kissed the starry sky
Spoke of what I know
Mike Hauser Mar 2015
Life is stabbing me in the back
With one hand while the other one slaps
I'm not sure what to think of that
Should I cry or should I laugh

Life keeps tossing me off of the bridge
I'm getting pretty used to it
That's just the way I and life live
Been that way since we were kids

That's when it's not throwing me in front of a train
Asking those around to give it a hand
Doesn't much matter whether woman or man
Life is never too proud to beg

Of course in the city it's under the bus
Guess life thinks that a train isn't enough
While my road burns are getting calloused and tough
I always seem to keep getting up

Life even spreads nasty rumors of me
Some of what life says I find hard to believe
What really hurts is that life lives with me
So I'm always in it's company
Which makes me wonder why life's out to get me
Mike Hauser Sep 2013
Contemplating the versatility of Mayo
And all that can be done with it
From the slathering on whilst sun bathing
To globbing it on my bologna sandwich

I find it tantalizing to the tastebuds
And it sure does sizzle in the sun
I once applied to much and set my toes on fire
Lucky for me I lost only one

Thank goodness I was near the water
When my foot went up in flames
I guess that's why God gives us ten toes
In case we lose any along the way

As with anything you can even get bored with Mayonnaise
That's why I strive for different ideas
So I put my brain juices into overdrive
And came up with this amazing list

Instead of milk in a shake you can use Mayo
Please wait till the end for all the applause
I'm still having trouble dealing with thickness
And have yet to get it through the straw

Perhaps if I leave out the ice cream
And just add Mayo, milk chocolate, and ice
I guess I'll just keep on experimenting
When it's ready you can be the first in line

And who doesn't like mayonnaise on anchovie pizza
The perfect combination at best
Even better than peanut butter and jelly
If only I can figure out how to package it

Mayonnaise is also the perfect conditioner
You could leave it in your hair for days I suppose
But try to avoid to much time in the sun
After all...remember the toes

I'm going back to my room for more ideas now
Or as I like to call it..."The Mayo Think Tank"
I know my family thinks I'm a genius
Cause they always leave me in there for days
Mike Hauser Dec 2017
This life I lead
Is a wide open door
You can see through me
Like a glass bottom boat

Read my inner thoughts
Like a comic book
Know what I'm about
From just one look

I'm a recipe
That's pretty simple to follow
A bit bitter to taste
Yet easy to swallow

You can write what you like
Be it right or wrong
Take what you find
You won't be too far off

A familiar tune
That's easy to sing
An under breath hum
In the key of C

In a wide open book
That begs to be read
Take just one look
You'll know me from beginning to end
Mike Hauser Aug 4
the more we look
the more we see
i look like you
you look like me

the less we tend
to disagree
on the little things
that are bothering

the more we talk
and get along
the more is right
the less is wrong

the more we love
the less we hate
we more or less
will find a way

the more we hold
each other up
the less chance of
coming undone

the more we look
the more we see
we more or less
will all agree

that i'm like you
and you're like me
all one big happy
family
Mike Hauser Sep 4
They give it in a whisper
Throw it out in a shout
Hoping you will listen
To the words, they spout

We all have our own opinions
Whether or not you need
Yet the only time we listen
Is if with me you agree

We've lost the art of compassion
Somewhere along the way
Drawing to the conclusion
Can't believe a word they say

The reprobates manipulate
And then call it daily news
Giving away their own brand of hate
In the words, they use to spew

As the Talking Heads spin
And blame the innocent
What happened to compassion
I often wonder where it went

We all have an opinion
That we gladly share
Though if your's is not in line with mine
Your's does not matter
Mike Hauser Mar 2016
I stand on the promises made
To sin no longer am its slave
For me His all is all He gave

"In this I have to thank My Savior"

For me is why He came to die
For me is why He sacrificed
For a lowly sinner such as I

"So in this I have to thank My Savior"

As He hung upon that tree
All the while with thoughts of me
Him being my greatest need

"For in this I have to thank My Savior"

On the third day He arose
Drawing deaths sting to a close
All in Heaven rejoice for they know

"Why in this I have to thank My Savior"

In Him I fully put my trust
To follow no matter what the cost
For He has found what once was lost

"And in this I have to thank My Savior"
Happy Easter my friends!
Mike Hauser May 2015
I stand on the promises made
To sin no longer am its slave
For me His all is all He gave

"In this I have to thank My Savior"

For me is why He came to die
For me is why He sacrificed
For a lowly sinner such as I

"So in this I have to thank My Savior"

As He hung upon that tree
All the while with thoughts of me
Him being my greatest need

"For in this I have to thank My Savior"

On the third day He arose
Drawing deaths sting to a close
All in Heaven rejoice for they know

"Why in this I have to thank My Savior"

In Him I fully put my trust
To follow no matter what the cost
For He has found what once was lost

**"And in this I have to thank My Savior"
Mike Hauser Aug 2018
As I strolled  down Beaker Street
A neon sign flashed in front of me

That said "Only Serious Poets Need Apply"
(Blink) "Need Apply" (Blink) "Need Apply"

So it was I thought to myself
I can think of nobody else

As serious a poet as I

I looked to the right and the left
Feeling pretty confident about myself

And decided to take a gander inside

The room it was totally dark
In the corner was the tiniest of sparks

I did a stately poetic stroll in that direction

Feeling I might have made a mistake
This thought occurred a little too late

But of course this whole scene might just be window dressing

A voice said we don't need a poet at all
Just someone dumb and gullible

That's the moment in my pants I started messing

Turns out it was a mad scientist
With a masters degree in craziness

What were his dastardly plans I could only be guessing

I was grabbed by a couple of **** thugs
Who highly dislike deodorant and mouthwash

******* and flown off to the smallest of islands

Where they did unspeakable experiments on me
In the first, second, and third degree

All because to insanity they took a liking

When it was they were finally done
With what those nut jobs consider good fun

Don't know how many walls they had me climbing

Daily now I plan my escape
I only hope that I'm not too late

When the opportunity arrives I hope I don't blow it

I find it so hard to believe
That this all has happened to little ole me

And Why?
Because of me being such a serious poet
Mike Hauser Apr 2013
As I strolled  Beaker Street
A neon sign flashed in front of me

That said "Only Serious Poets Need Apply"
(Blink) "Need Apply" (Blink) "Need Apply"

So it was I thought to myself
I can think of nobody else

As serious a poet as I

I looked to the right and the left
Feeling pretty confident about myself

And decided to take a gander inside

The room it was totally dark
In the corner was the tiniest of sparks

I did a stately poetic stroll in that direction

Feeling I might have made a mistake
This thought occurred a little to late

But of course this whole scene might just be window dressing

A voice said we don't need a poet at all
Just someone dumb and gullible

That's the moment in my pants I started messing

Turns out it was a mad scientist
With a masters degree in craziness

What were his dastardly plans I could only be guessing

I was grabbed by a couple of thugs
Who highly dislike deodorant and mouthwash

******* and flown off to the smallest of islands

Where they did unspeakable experiments on me
In the first, second, and third degree

All because to insanity they took a liking

When it was they were finally done
With what those nut jobs consider good fun

Don't know how many walls they had me climbing

Daily now I plan my escape
I only hope that I'm not to late

When the opportunity arrives I hope I don't blow it

I find it so hard to believe
That this all has happened to me

And Why?
Because of me being such a serious poet
Mike Hauser Jul 2014
We're all out there searching
For something on which to spend our time
To make us all feel better
As we move on down the line

With all these newfangled religions
Popping up like temple gardens in Kathmandu
No wonder there's so many people
Out there without a clue

With every New Age Preacher
Spouting off they know the way
Leading their blind believers
Into the pit with what they say

Where they don't need to dig any deeper
Not to overly concerned with right or wrong
Just nodding to the rhythm
Like you would a Justin Timberlake Top 40 song

All the time hoping when you die
That you've been good enough
No explanations or reasons why
You feel that way because

It's in our human nature
To always want for more
Needing questions answered
Of what the afterlife holds in store

So if you feel unsatisfied
In the search that your life is on
Pick up the good book, the Bible
And start off at page One
Mike Hauser May 2015
What I'm getting ready to lay out for you
You might find incredible but it's nothing new
In today's world you're as good as *******
If there's no more than two or three of you

That's why I'm fixing to make a couple of clones
That I can sit back and call my very own
One for the office and one for home
With the three of me no one the wiser will know

The one at the office I'll teach to say yes sir
Keeping his lips pursed, a genuine **** kisser
Of course he won't have to do all that much work
They'll all get suspicious if he goes overboard

The clone at home will love the wife and the kids
Wash the dogs, the cars, make sure the cat's fed
Mow the yard if there's any time left
Then round about 9pm start nodding his head

While the real me will be down in the Keys
Living it up in Florida luxury
The only action from now on that I'm going to see
Are the bluest of waves as they're pounding the beach

So who could blame me for going it clone
Things are much easier when you don't go it alone
Would have done it much sooner if I had known
Everyone should have one or two clones
Note: The clones in this poem are purely fictional and in no way reflect that of the author nor that of his clones.
Mike Hauser Jun 2013
The sheep in the nearby pasture
Heard what the cows had done
In the building of their rocket ship
And they too wanted one

A few of them shaved for pocket change
Black market wool brings a hefty price
While some went out to Las Vegas
To try their luck at the roll of the dice

First thing they did with the money
Was to spring for Sherman's release
The only one in the family to go to Harvard
Though it was for experiments on his mind which apparently they fleeced

Right away they noticed something odd about Sherman
Something that just wasn't quite right
But passed it off as genius quirkiness
And let that idea slide by

They told Sherman what it was they wanted
Said he had a mad...um...master plan
All the sheep turned and Baaa'd together
What was that, that he just said?

For weeks all they heard was banging and clanging
From inside their farmers shed
The only activity they saw outside
The massive delivery of Dominos crazy bread

One day the shed doors flew wide open
There stood Sherman as mad as acid rain
No doubt among the sheep in the pasture
He was Bonkers, Loony, Loopy...okay Sherman's insane

As he drug his creation into the open
Not a one in the crowd uttered a word
Till little Bobby Black Sheep spoke up and said
Is that a cows udder?...is that what they think that they just herd?!

Sherman took that moment of bewilderment
To swing onto udder #4
Strapping himself inside of his contraption
And shooting off for the stars

Sherman is still up there circling the planet
Did you hear about the phenomenon in Spain?
Just the other day something amazing there happened
There was the pouring of milk instead of rain...

But we know how that miracle happened
And that it came from the udders galore
Cause when your traveling through space like Sherman
What else would udders be for
Just heard from the Pigs...
They too want a piece of this action...
Mike Hauser Apr 2013
I needed to do some shopping
On poem ideas I was running low
So I checked out the local flyer
To the downtown poet store

Just to see what they had on sale
Some of my friends they call me cheap
But why pay full price if you don't have to
On all the rhyming words I need

The front page slapped me in the face
With the Spring Cleaning Sale Galore
Everything I needed was half price
So I headed straight to the store

I ventured up and down the isles
Filling my basket with the best of rhyme
Getting a few extras of every word
So I'd have them when the time was right

I stocked up on love and encouragement
The right words I carefully chose
Because in my experience
You can never have to many of those

I even took a few from the back
Down a darkened isle where the lights were low
Being a poet my mood can rapidly change
And what words I might need you never know

With my basket full of wonder
I felt my day of shopping done
Confidant and ready
To go home and continue writing poems
Mike Hauser Sep 2013
I woke up in a Spaghetti Western
Not sure how this happened to me
Standing on the dusty streets of Laredo
With six desperado's down the street

I gazed off to my left
As a tumbleweed went tumbling by
There was a dog howling in the distance
With an odd sheen to the western sky

Can't say I wasn't trigger happy
With my hand inching towards my gun
Still wondering how it is I appeared here
In this B-movie western

Women and children were running for cover
They knew what was soon to go down
Truth is you can expect nothing less
When you live in a Spaghetti Western town

Pecos Bill was the first to draw
As I shot him between the eyes
Want you to know I took no pleasure in
Watching the other five men die

As I rode off into the sunset
The credits behind me scrolled
How I woke up inside of this movie
Is a mystery I will never know
Mike Hauser Apr 2013
My Mamma cried
When she'd heard what I'd done
My Daddy went back inside
And he grabbed his gun

I'd met a ******* the other side of town
Of course I am white and of course she is brown
I don't rightly care cause we're both in love
And I ain't gonna let her suffer none

We's from Birmingham
Down South Birmingham Alabama you see
If'in you must know the year
I'd say a shameful 1963

There was unrest amongst the people
Which was bad enough
But it was doubly troublesome
On our taboo love

Deep segregation kept our worlds apart
Something the youth of the day couldn't see
Outside color don't matter, it's what's in the heart
That's the hold she has over me

Not really sure things have changed all that much
Though it's our nature to want to pretend
I'm not much into caring what others might think
Sometimes you gotta stand up like a man

I'm telling this tale from my front porch swing
As I listen to my Grandchildren's playful screams
While holding hands rocking back and forth
My lovely brown skinned beauty and me
Mike Hauser Mar 2014
every poem that i find
in the deep recess of my mind
always comes equipped*
with a
"tag along rhyme"

not strong enough
to stand on its own
this particular rhyme
needs the structure of poem

so it stands on the edge
of the thoughts in my head
when a poem does comes along
it jumps at the chance

to stick out its thumb
to hitch a free ride
around these parts known
as the
*"tag along rhyme"
Mike Hauser Aug 2013
It wasn't exactly my plan
To give the world the upper hand
In turning me
Into what I appear to be
That is a Bionic Man

It was an innocent start
This hardening of heart
That no longer fells sorrow for the troubles of man

I'm afraid this heart's made of steel
That no longer can feel
Making me out to be a Bionic Man

What about the warm hand I used to hold out
To the stranger in doubt
Now this hand has become as cold as ice

I find that these days
That it barely waves
To the neighbors that I have in my life

Bionic Man, Bionic Man
No want for the unwanted
When there's no love for fellow man
I've become a machine
No need for those who are in need
When I've become what I am
"The Bionic Man"

Then there's the mind
That is cynical most times
Not knowing who are what to believe

I know it's not right
But this mechanical mind
Forms opinions before facts even seen

Steely gray eyes when they stare
Show they could not even care
What goes on between you and me

Sometimes they're droopy and tired
When not properly wired
They're numb to all the things that I see

Bionic Man, Bionic Man
No want for the unwanted
When there's no love for fellow man
I've become a machine
No need for those who are in need
When I've become what I am
*"The Bionic Man"
Mike Hauser Oct 2017
Why is it you try and blame me
I have no control over history
Only with the time I have
And I have a hard enough time controlling that

Stop playing the victim in all of this
In your best interest get over it
Try standing on your own two feet
Instead of putting the past's blame on me

How will you ever get ahead
If you're always being beaten down by the past
Can't we treat the past as dead and gone
Learn from it and then move on

Instead of putting the blame on everyone else
Why not take a good look at yourself
You're a slave to your "why me" beliefs
And your beliefs have nothing to do with me
I'm seriously fed up with the way society has gotten lately...Grow up people and do something about it besides whining over every little issue.
Mike Hauser Jul 2015
I'm building a bunker
Deep and down under
Away from the crazies
Is it any wonder

It's come down to this
Land of misfits
Add it to the list
Kentucky fried crisp

I buy all my groceries
Where nobody knows me
I'm in such a hurry
It causes a nose bleed

Cans of sardines
Boston baked beans
Astronaut Tang©
For when I'm thirsty

Take it back to my place
Till dark shows its face
Then make a bee line
With guns, groceries, and mace

I shut the trap door
Place it all on the floor
Plug in my phone
Ring me up when it's over
Mike Hauser Jun 2015
When they discovered him a dreamer

The decision then was made

To have him keep rocks in his pockets

So he wouldn't float away
Mike Hauser Jul 2013
I hold right here in my grimy little hands

The tiniest of vials

A magic elixir to cure all your ills

Guaranteed to bring you a smile

It has the finest of all ingredients

Ever concocted poured into it

From Himalayan Buddhist Monks finger nail dust

To pure Indian cobra snake spit

It'll clean you out of whatever ails you

It'll make you want to join the circus so you can eat fire

It'll burn the hair out of your ears and put them on your chest

Then want to pull them out with industrial pliers

It'll cause the old to do somersaults

And toddlers to sing gospel hymns

This magic elixir I now hold in my hands

So step right up my gullible friends

......And Let The Biding Begin
Mike Hauser Mar 2013
I've got this awesome idea
To write the greatest of poems
It'll start out nice and easy
Then with a BANG make some noise

It will be widely read
In every coffeehouse in town
Soon to catch on like a wildfire
Then #1 with a bullet nation bound

Writing so amazing
It'll astound everyone
Why it might even get hired killers
To turn in their guns

It'll make the strong want to weep
And the weak to stand strong
There will be waves of applause
This poem will have it all going on

They'll beg me to let them use it
In a Presidential speech
Afterwards they'll fly it straight to the conflict
Where it'll bring peace to the Middle East

Finally coming to rest at the Smithsonian
Taking up it's rightful place
They may have to move that old Space Shuttle
To give my poem plenty of space

But before any of this can happen
Before it rings true, buckaroo
I suppose I should think up something special
And jot down a line, maybe two...
Mike Hauser Sep 2013
I sometimes wonder what I would do
If I were only as tall as the inch of two
Would I dart and dash amongst the feet
Trying to avoid them from squishing me

Would my home be a hole in the wall
Like Mr.Mouse, who to me is pretty tall
Or would I snuggle up underneath the fridge
And eat what little food is dropped to the edge

I could take soda caps from out of the trash
And turn them into little party hats
Paint them all in colors bright
Then hand them out to the pantry mice

The bedroom dust bunnies and I
Would hang out all the time
Each of us light as a feather mind you
As we run from the house keepers evil vacuum

If I go out during the day to play
I'll make sure it's a place that's safe
Away from swooping birds and killer bees
Just in case I'll take dust bunny security with me

We could open a park that's safe for us
Where little people can play from morning to dusk
At the end of the day we would head for home
With fingers entwined so we're never alone

And when we do make it back home
I'd gather all the dust bunnies I know
We'd sit in a circle underneath the bed
Where I'd tell of the days adventures I had

I sometime wonder what I would do
If I were only as tall as the inch of two...
Another collaboration with my writing buddy KM!
We've done several together...check out her site!
Mike Hauser Jun 2015
I am "The Incredible Aging Man"
Aging right before your eyes
Something that I plan to continue to do
Until the day it is I died

Watch as the wrinkles magically appear
In the most unlikely of places
See the thinning of hair, the enlarging of ears
The forgetfulness of where I last placed it

Learn how to use your patience
As over time I am losing mine
Using familiar phrases like it'll be okay
And your going to be just fine

Show up with your loud voices
As my hearing starts to wain
And feel free to read letters to me
As my eye sight does the same

Listen in as I moan and groan
When weak in the knees I bend and buckle
Come with me on the day they put me away
As I become increasingly befuddled

Sit with me here as into the distance I stare
Forgetting now who it is I am
I do so hope you enjoy the show
Of this "The Incredible Aging Man"
Mike Hauser Mar 2013
This could be a true story
Before I'm through you'll feel that way
I sit on a bench beneath the shade
In the park eating lunch most everyday

It's been going on two weeks now
That I've watched that girl walk by
Normally a plain girl like her
Would never have caught my eye

But there was something about her
That for days I could not grasp
The look of anticipation that she had
Didn't match the hesitation in her step

You see there's this P.O. Box in the park
On the far upper east side
After visiting she would leave each day
With disappointment as her guide

Without really knowing her
I can't be sure of what it is she's looking for
Perhaps a letter from a lover
Or a husband off to war

But this day it was different
As she reached her hand inside
Pulling out that for which she had waited
What now seems like all her life

With a look of total elation
She jumped up and down awhile
The  joy  beyond contagious
I could not help but break into a smile

No longer in her step, the hesitation
She tore at the envelope with anticipation
On the bench next to me she sat
At the turn of her life's transformation

The first tear it dropped and found its mark
Upon the pages as she read
A world oblivious to the pain inside
As the birds chirped overhead

Disappointment came back to guide her
So much had changed since it last held her hand
This time life it held no purpose
As she strolled away, the living dead

She left behind the tear stained note
Dare I even try
To gaze into the only clue
Of this now tragic life

As I reached out for the letter
A breeze blew in from the South
And took with it that longing clue
To what this tragedy was all about

Nowadays I sit here on this lonely bench
I never saw that girl again
But my mind often goes back and wonders
About the letter and what it held within
Mike Hauser Apr 2013
The power never satisfies
The hunger in it's eyes
Bearing sharpened teeth
Preying on the weak
Portrays itself as free
With the powers that be
When there is nothing else
It will pounce upon itself

FEED THE LION

With it's mighty paws
Disregarding natures laws
Purring like a kitten
The innocent are smitten
The Big Cat plays by jungle rules
Other rules are for utter fools
Predators are all the same
In how they play the game

THE MIGHTY LION

A King that once ran free
But that was not meant to be
Pulled down by it's own greed
Brought to it's very knees
A tumor no man could see
Inside out is how it bleeds
Now that the Lion feels the need
It's to late to set it free

*CAGE THE LION
Mike Hauser Apr 2013
We were strangers when it was we first met
From the far corners of the world
All that we have in common
Is our love for the rhyming word

This is where we find ourselves each day
On this  Poets Corner at any given time
Enlightening each other as it's meant to be
With our mastery of rhyme

Not one better than another
Each unique in our own way
The way it is we use our wit
And what it is we choose to say

When there's joy we all join in the laughter
When there's sorrow we share in the cry
Here on this corner we gather together
Intersecting with each others lives

With our hearts and our souls laid open
For all of the world to see
We are so different yet so much the same
On this corner where friend's and poets all meet
Mike Hauser Aug 2018
You know that I know
But not about to let on
To the secret of the secret handshake

It's been around for years
Barely above a whisper
As most take it to their grave

No one knows where it's from
It's just been here all along
Comes in different models and makes

Has a manual to please
In invisible ink
So the secret's not given away

You must swear on an oath
Not to let the truth go
To do so would be a mistake

Sounds mad as a hatter
But it's no laughing matter
The secret of the secret handshake
Mike Hauser Jul 2015
God labored on his six day creation plan
On the seventh he took rest as a working man
For to bring into existence nature's many beautiful things
His magnificent mind had exerted its wondrous visionary springs

As God stood back and saw that it was good
Adding man into the neighborhood
Placing on him all of its worth
Fully in charge of this Mother Earth

Tending to the vegetation and grand rivers with a hand of responsible care
In the glory which God gave his flock a share
Being his custodians bought unto them an obligatory task
That in each new day they could brilliantly bask

But alas what happens when you put man in charge
The head on his shoulders tends to get rather large
Then you add sneaky Satan into the mix
And it's pretty much been a down hill run with his malevolent fix

A cursed torment he bestowed on the divine Earth's ring
God's people wandered from their sublime path of conserving
A shepherd's voice was needed to call them back to their reside
Where nature's best interests did preside

Something only God can to the least of these perfect
To carry his vision is a burden on mankind's back
But God's love shall turn the wrong doers defiant track
So the world can be beautified in blessed anointment

To get back to perfection that he's always designed
But this time to do it all through the Son of God acting as the undersigned
Sitting at God's right hand man's intercessor
Who'll ever be the Savior of the sinning transgressor
It's always a real pleasure working with Elizabeth! The girl oozes poetry!
Mike Hauser Mar 2013
Woke up this morning with the brightest idea
That I took with me to a busy street corner today
I didn't carry a sign to waste any time
I just stood there all day and I waved

I waved to the cars, trucks, and busses
I even waved to a homeless man pushing a cart
I waved so much through out the day
My wave it became expression art

Many passersby honked their approval
While some with a finger said I was #1
I waved and I waved till late in the day
And yet felt I still wasn't done

I had waved to all the daily commuters
But what about those that only come out in the night
Just because they sleep late doesn't mean they should miss a good wave
If you think about it that wouldn't be right

So I stood there under the glow of the street lights
Giving the night owls a taste of my wave
Letting them know they're just as special
As those that hang out in the day

When my last wave said goodbye it was over
I packed up my hand in my pocket in style
I believe I'll come back to the corner tomorrow
But this time I'll just stand there and smile
Mike Hauser Mar 26
I've dipped into this well so many times
Expecting any day now it's going to run dry
Trying my luck, tossing my dime
Hoping against hope it'll work one more time

Being high on ambition, low on ideas
If you care to listen then listen to this
Whether it be a hit or it be a miss
Each poem that I write I send off with a kiss

But alas a kiss is not all they need
To make it or break it, help it succeed
Can I let you in on a secret between you and me
Poetry can be freeing but not always free

So here I am at the well again hoping to find
The inspiration needed with the other poets in line
Some say they don't need this but that line I'm not buying
We're all individuals here but still one of a kind

We all live on the edge afraid of that day
The words up and leave us with nothing left to say
And through all this I wonder if that will make
Me happy or sad for sanity's own sake

So could someone kindly lend me a dime
Seeing as through all this I've misplaced mine
Up one end and down the other steeper side
Till I've finally reached the end of this rhyme
Mike Hauser Apr 2013
I feel so sorry for these creatures
What is it they do all day
Stuck behind this wall of glass
With those blank looks on their face

Have they ever tasted sweet freedom
Or were they born inside their cage
Do they even know any better
It seems their lives are such a waste

Over the years they sure have fattened up
Put on a bit of weight
Do you think that those who feed them
Have changed their diet as of late

If I could just lift this latch
Then I could set those creatures free
But I'm not even sure these stupid animals
Realize they have the need

*Sat and said the Zoo Monkey to his friend...
Mike Hauser Apr 24
Did you just think what we think you thought
What we think we thought you thunk
Well you, my friend have just been caught
Thank you very much

As we go through what we know of you
When you're awake and when you sleep
You might have made a grave mistake
We shall see say the "Thought Police"

Did you think to do what you shouldn't do
Then in the Queue change your mind
At the slightest clue, we let the Hell Hounds loose
You'll think better when you think next time

We're reigning in the cranium
Flatfoots on the beat
Try and think that thought again
You'll think twice around the "Thought Police"

When you think to think you better think
Long before you do
With us nearby monitoring
We've got ears and eyes on you

Have you ever thought to turn yourself in
Tell us what you think
We're bound to find out eventually
After all, we're the "Thought Police"
Coming to a city near you!
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