Embarking on these quests in search of nothing left to own
The paths I find
The trails I blaze
May distance me from home
To shores I tread
And streets I step
To beats of strolling stone
Still muck I plod
And sludge I trudge
I promenade alone
For peaks I reach
And skies I breach
Shall be my roamin' throne

Then she disappears
And I’m here
Barely speaking
My friends are disputing
But I am just seeking
A way to get back to
Her doorstep and wait
For my turn
To return her
When it’s getting late
And for now
Say goodbye
Never sure she’d reply
In the morning
Should I be
The first to confide

Then you bring it back
Like some lost,
Alone
Omen
The that’s all folks
Crowd
Settles down
For the showman
And no man
Would step to me
Showing
Or going
Just so and so
Showboating
Bloviate,
Blowin’ hate
On some sic ****
With this nation is great
As they’re making me wait
For my life
On the line
And they keep feeding me
That weird **** on the side
And just biding their time
Till I finally die
Buying
Bye bye bye
Viruses
Crying wolf
Crises
And ISIS is still out there
Deep
In the silences

More useful to you
When I’m here
And I’m quiet
And nightly
My psyche  
Is shrinking like violet
And no one to turn to
To talk to
Beguiles
The moments we have
To defensive on trials
The miles and miles
I’ve tread in exiles
I’ve fled
With but dread
And the words it compiles
To somehow coherently
Articulate it
Relate it
To all of them
Then I restate it

Dusk settles in
On my grimmest despair
Of my guilty subconscious
I’m all too aware
Too fixated on quelling
The faith reservations
Uproarious tirade
Of self-confrontations
At war with
Internal conformist
Resent
I nocturnally wander
The wastes of lament
Not enough for
My suffering’s
Love hesitant
But sincere
What I actually feel
Is content

Sink
In surrender
She wouldn’t soon
Weather
The storming of you
Misconstrues
Valuation
My life is but dirt
To a withered carnation
Just want you to know
That my love is engraved in
The strongest of stone
Still at home in goodbye
Still acquainted with
Living for
Reason to die

I could spend every second
just writing away
I could write til the sun
shines on a new day
I could write tales of magic
of monsters and myth
I could write space adventures
of Jedi and Sith
I could write a report
of historical force
I could write a thesis
that changes its course
I could write you a song
of the demons I dread
I could write symphonies
when they dance in my head
I could write a sad poem
your heart would be mine
I could write out a note
and then leave you behind

I could write of the heroes
i've seen in my dreams
I could write of the villains
you've heard in my screams
I could write of transcendence
achieved on my trips
I could write how I've loosened
reality's grips
I could write of the darkness
and emptiness oceans
I could write how I drown
in this sea of emotions
I could write of the issues
and problems to solve
I could write how I've tried
to help humans evolve
I could write of the lies
no mind could conceive
I could write of the truths
no brain would believe  

I could write where I'm going
and where I have been
There's no way of knowing
just where to begin
There's so many webs
my words could soon spin
Yet none of them stronger
than love's sweetest sin
So I start with the veins
she's still coursing within
And I end with the pain
she left under my skin

Stumped tonight
Watching this endless debate
Candidates are still rated
On who can berate
Moderators the least
And opponents the most,
When really both still don
The cloak of the ghost

Of pale moon ghosts I reminisce
  on how I've froze
  in powdered woes  
And nothing good can come of this
  struck by love's
  snow lightning doves
And Lady Winter's frigid kiss
   like icebergs loosening my lips
   and sinking my relationships
In blizzards of cold-blooded bliss
  fearless should the pulsing stanch
  invincible my avalanche
All need for warmth I could dismiss
  when old King Candy cuts it clean
  in palaces of Queen Frostine
Pure wonderlands of happiness
  melt into my slippery streets
  than soon the Santa's sleigh retreats
Face down on pavements of abyss
  the black becomes all I can see
  come take this white away from me
Forget this ******* emptiness

Every night I try to write
Another magnum opus
Masterpiece  
For all to read
And be at peace
And maybe learn a thing or two
About the me they never see
In secrecy, I literally
Confide in strangers
Who could be
My alternate
Identity

They take a long march
And recruit
The downtrodden
Enforcing their farces
Then throw the whole lot in
The ring
Where the circus
Bespectacled
Beckons
The animals caged
Labor slaves
Win elections
Politicized weapons
Discounting the vote
And outsourcing
Offshoring
The capsizing boat
To some far-reaching
Not my backyard approach
Passes
The buck
To the bucket list
Kicked
Working classes

I wonder
Who else she can be
Without me
Among others
Her colors
Must variably
Withhold shades
She displays
By my side
Smiles wide
But then sooner or later’s
Like somebody died
And the joy in the room
Is vacuumed into space
And the hope that I had for us
Obliterates
And in case she is out there
Erasing her life
I can merely be glad
That she had a good night

Somehow abnormal
To not need attention
To not crave the warm,
Soothing touch
Of affection
Been left to my own
Plot devices
And vices
And try as I might
Nothing seems to excite me
Entice me
Lust used to ignite me
Rewrite me
Completely
But only for her
And for her
What we were
Is no more
My brief blush
With polygamy
Ended before
I could flirt with disaster
And court her calamity
After enraptured
By love in its vanity
I just watched sanity
Slipping away
And still unto the goddess
Of discord
I pray

Can’t leave her side
Always on her
Rely
When without her
You cry
When she’s gone?
Can’t survive
Why belie
You are anything more
Than a child?
So eager to seek out
A care-taking lover
Replacing  
The lost embrace
Arms of the mother

Would appear
They take liking
To ones about writing
The most
But I don’t mean to boast
Of my scribing
Capacities
Lyrical rhapsodies
Nothing like that
I just type what comes naturally
Try to keep track
And reflect back upon
Who I was yesterday
So in years from now
Both of us know
How I changed

Bereavement
Without even
Reason to grieve
You’re still there,
Or somewhere
But now you get to leave
When you want
And I need
The lifeline
To the other side
Love is just greed
Soon enough
You’re with me
Then you’re my
Property
What I’d fight to retain with
In security  
So align with some other landlord
And be claimed
Just remember above it all’s
Where we once reigned

Just take it
Disgraceful
Exploitative snakes
Your duplicitous
Subterfuge
Scam aggravates
Me to no end
Dependent
On what you provide
Just another class luxury
Robbing me blind
Been deprived
A lot worse
And still found a connection
To internet speeds
Expediting depression
And I will secure its
Expanses of bandwidths
As if overlords
Of the data plan
Planned it

Let me run rampant
Across your enchantment
And lambent illumine
Your gloom catacombs
For I lurk
Go berserk
In accursed
Mirth manic
And contradict gods
Just to feel
More titanic
Volcanic at times
So inclined to destroy
Overruled,
Undermined
By these rhymes I enjoy
Thunder mind
Does not rest
Until bolts in the brain
Can explain
What I claim
In a more cryptic way

Living on the wild side
Of man-made legislature
With a will of rhino hide
Defending laws of nature

From invasive species gaining
On a three-ring circus stage
In an age of lion-taming
Makes us monkeys in a cage

As we're sinking to extinction levels
Captives in a profit zoo  
When grizzly bear essentials
Could replant the trees where once they grew

When green was life, and not its price
And Earth it had no cost
Her beauty would alone suffice
For all resources lost

Before we ravaged her chaste skies
And bled her dry of ****** lands
By forcing her to synthesize
Our selfish energy demands

Vicious avaricious rats
A mass consumption plague
Of king cobra bureaucrats
No drop of oil shame

Rising seas to meet their marks
Bottom-fed on dying reefs
Cold and lifeless, great white sharks
Their souls of coal lie deep beneath

Pearly, sparkling teeth of preachers
Sheep until their time is done
Show these puny, insect creatures
Powers of your chosen sun

Wish this was you
I was texting to
Speaking to
Worst case scenarios
Silently
Seeping through
As the time passes
Between us amasses
A chasm so vast
When you still appear active
On apps we’re not using
For more than each other
Exclusively choosing
To see where it leads
Without squandering options
Though limiting mine
When I’m locked in these clock-ins
A coffin too early
To bury me in
If you go
And I’m left
Devastated again

Addicted to this strain of pen
The pain and rain embraces melt
Away in her oblivion
Still numb to opioids she felt
My love at last is laid to rest
In unrequited sleepless nights
And answers of indifference
To questions of my greatest heights
Free-falling fears I left behind
To see depression's comatose
Was riddled with my lucid mind
Still hers was what I craved the most
A stronger drug I've yet to find

See through my eyes
And I’ll stare through yours back
Peering into the looking glass
Find what I lack
What is missing
A piece, perhaps two
Maybe three
Maybe dozens will make us
Feel finally free
To discover the falls
From the rise once again
Two journeys diverging
From whence they begin
Or began I suppose
Is the tense
I would use
When with rhyme
I dispose
And dispense with propensities
To disengage
Until all of those pieces
Again rearrange
In my head
And create
A new image of you and I
Twisted in fate

You don’t seem like
The small talk
Kind
So tell me
What is
On your mind
And in your heart
What claims
Your soul
What urges
Can you not
Control
Withhold
What you’d prefer to share
What most in public
Wouldn’t dare
Divulge
If it indulges sleep
You can’t be sure
Your secrets keep
Or that I’d seek
To understand
Reciprocate
Your candor
And
Expect
My intellect
To match
Gratuities
Preferred
In cash

7 billion mouths to feed
Empty bellies full of greed
Faithful junk food our main course
Of action to appease this force
So ravenous for what to do
We bite off more than we can chew
We need to have, we need to take
Mass consumption stomachache
Devouring everything in sight
Insatiable our appetite
So hunt we must, or starve we will
A violent image, made to ****
To conquer, ravage, seize and own
Ensuring lega-seeds are sewn
Elucidating our own birth
By leaving one more mouth on earth
Condemned to taste the wars of men
Destined to eat the rest of them
Eternal struggling, burden beasts
Will find only damnation feasts
No fruits of labor hanging down
Not one of them shall wear the crown
They hungered for so truthfully
But slaughtered for so ruthlessly
So it was, it is, will always be
Only in death are we set free
Humanity's a prison cell
We dine alone in God's green hell

Departing my world just to find
That her's I had to leave behind
For the one our love designed
Could not be shared with all mankind
Until the peace I have defined
Transcends the world that is my mind

Socratic **** heads off their meds
Don’t always look like kids with dreads
Sometimes they **** a different strain
Of Communism’s crack contain
Mad geniuses I can’t explain
You people fret about all day
Addicted to existence pain
And all the dollar signs it weighs

Profanity firestorm
Thirsting to burst
I would curse you,
Condemn you
Lay waste to your warmest embraces
Erase
Your desires
Ambitions
Your joys
And your dreams
As your faithfulness
Falls to its knees
Before me
And your peace of mind
Mine
To wage war upon
Endlessly
Senselessly slaughtering
Every serenity
Bashing your brains in
And slurping the juices
Tearing your limbs
As your screams
Are my muses
And drink to your death
In insidious glee
Then dispose of what’s left
Of your faint memory
Yes a fate
So befitting
An error of life
A mistaken creation
Would I so delight
In exacting
Or to be exact
Executing
But here is where my
****** weapon’s
Concluding

And I just sit and I just stare
And I just wander in my room
And I just think and I just talk
And then I look upon the moon
That girl is mine and she is beautiful
A beacon in the night
She glows a Fenris in my heart
That will devour starry light
And every ******* thing in sight
If she is half or she is new
Or not a moreso often blue
If she don’t tell me who the hunter is
Who gazed upon her womb
Like some abomination Cretan
This no Spartan son of mine
This lesser-landed Ath-en-ian
Now beholden in eye thine

Ensnare with my arrogant hair
Barren gorgons
And arid wastelands,
Robber barons,
And Mormons
Alike
And still stormin’
The shores,
Waging wars
Then awaiting the swarm in...
Ignoring the warnings,
Invade any brain draining
Third world conforming
To get back on track,
On the road,
To the beacon
The opportune nest,
Restive garden of Eden
Distribute it evenly,
Plunder its troves,
Then enrichment,
Conscripting
Its voters in droves
I convince the invincible
Youth to support us,
And bury the gentry
Who choose to abort us
Beneath what their legacy
Formerly claimed
A hegemony over
The soldiers enchained
‘Gotta cavalry charge
Of the labor force
Horses
And infantry drones
Who have grown so remorseless
So prone to divorces
Their arguments formed
In a silence’s moment
When omens of showmans
Class clash
Is the act
I remind the fine-diners
Of how to react
To the change
They don’t want
To result from the bill
Like hypocrisy
Eats,
But can’t stomach the ****

But then I feel you slipping
In a sickness
Now I’m missing
What began as mostly
Sobering
Confessions,
Awkward kissing
Could become
A purge of toxins
From concoctions
We imbibe
The dark designs
Of what the shadow selves
Cannot keep deep inside
And in an instant
She is distant
After
Afternoons delight
And in the fall of night
She spills her rotten guts
And now I write

Cutting razor
blade of life
Pointless, dull
existence knife
Sharpened by
the edge of strife

Won't somebody
save my life
From this wretched,
worthless knife
Buried in
my skin of strife

This sorrow stalks
its prey of life
And sets it teeth
of biting knife
Upon my flesh
to feast on strife

Vampiric in its
draining life
This empty, soulless,
cold-heart knife
Shall feel the warmth
of crimson strife

Until the streams
of dripping life
Release my grip
upon this knife
And rivers flow
in tranquil strife

See I know why
you've courted strife
I've tasted lips
of the sweet knife
Her tempting kiss
was my whole life

Through ****** tears
and sweaty strife
I've cried with every
lonely knife
That spends each day
so lost in life

Adrift at sea
shipwreck of strife
Beckoned by
beguiling knife
To drown in siren
songs of life

Through Odysseys
of epic strife
I forged a sword
to replace knife
Allowed this pen
to claim my life

An argonaut
against the strife
To tides of ink
I cast the knife
Now fight with me
write for your life

Somehow still plenty
Of energy left
Fell asleep on the couch
Then into my bed crept
Like a crypt for the restless
Upon which I write
With increasingly recent
Infrequency
Nightly
Entire day typing
Like lightning
A living
Is humble and honest
Yet fraught with misgiving
I taught
More tautology
Wrought my own ends
As I sought the renewing
Undoing it pens

If I could but verbalize
This written language
I speak in my head
I'd express divine gardens
Perception renews  
On the tip of my tongue
Yet my mouth misconstrues

Astrology oceans
Of my consciousness
Like a nuke of emotions
Set to implode
As my knowledge oasis
Dries up in the deserts
Conversing these places

As speech bubbles pop
My most wild dream clouds
Asleep in my mind
Like dormant volcanoes
With so much to share
But discussion eruptions  
I just can not bare

Can’t be changed
Without action
‘Till then it’s just words
Movement gains
Create traction
By practicing verbs
But perhaps paradoxically
Both coincide
If you think about doing
In all forms of rhyme
For the pen, like a sword
Is a weapon you wield
And to foes of the former
The latter revealed
Inspiration to wage
The just causes belie
That you don’t need to ****
To still powers defy

Ghosts of my own
Shadows passing
From past mistakes
Drove a stake
Straight
Into remnants of fate
And erased every mark
That I made on this place
Pearly gates
I’ve been pounding on
Just empty space

So it’s back to the study
Of tending to legacy
How and why
Man persists
Writing his history

Down in the rabid
Whole world
Gone to war
Down in dumps
Of lined-pockets
That buy and sell more
Down beneath the extinction
Clockwork
Agent Orange
Down furthermore still
In its cluster bomb
Torrent

So back to the study I go
Tending legacy
Soon I will know
How and why
I write history

Barely an enemy
Faced on the front
But the one in the mirror
Undaunted confront
For we go to our graves
Free to liberate slaves
But we settle
For personal,
Tribal enclaves
Just a trivial anecdote
Lost in dilution
Delusions of
Sought after
Final solution

So back to the study we must
Tend to legacy
Soldier on
King and pawn
Written in history

Alive as we were that day
Walking around
I still thought of decaying
With you in the ground
As if that was the end result
Goal I should set
All the days in between
I would drink to forget
So long as assured
In eternity
Stayed
The romanticized
You and I
Picturesque frame

Crash upon me like a wave
Then gently pull me out to sea
Seal me in your heart-shaped box
Then be the key that sets me free

Each breath I draw and step I take
Without you makes my spirit ache

And buries me in floorboard creaks
To run as shivers down the spine
Black widow webs and Snow White fiends
Are all that slithers through my mind

In sunlit shadows I reside
Without you by my other side

Where afterlives of former self
Became the current's flow unbound
The scent of harmonies in bloom
The taste of spring's delicious sound

The powers that I just can't bare
Without you there for me to share

What have we come to
When traitors can lead
When corrupt,
Vile vermin
Determine
Who breeds
Can it be
Only me
Who can see
It’s so blatant
So obviously
Just a demagogue
Racist  
A ******
Effacing
Most sacred
Tradition
Obsequious
Supplicants
Cowed to submission
So vow
As if spouses
To sheepishly serve
To uphold
Anti-heroes
You feel you deserve
But I bow
To no power
Mad
Impotent
Infant
A spoiled princeling
Who reveals in an instant
His true color
Red
In the face
With hot air
A buffoonish balloon
He could say it’s the sun
When it’s clearly the moon
But these doomed
Imbeciles
Will have not
But delusion
Defending their rights
In his new
Constitution

Consigned to the trash heap
Of history stained
By your vain attempts to
Resurrect its blood shame
Assert claims
Of peremptory
Right to rule
Break
Any law you see fit
Can’t admit
Your mistakes
And I’d stake any shred
Of what dignity’s LEFT
In this laughing stock mockery
Country
By theft
You inherited,
Plundered your tax haven wealth
From the same people
You’re still depriving
Of health
Go to hell
Don’t return
You can burn all you want
With your fire and fury taunt,
Narcissist vaunt
Flaunting as the undaunted
Proud Boy’s commandant
Nonchalantly don cloaks
Of the ghosts
That still haunt
Like Levant false messiah’s  
Disguised as Mein Kampf
But of course it’s just China’s
New World worker’s comp
Weaponizing infectious
Investment detente
That’s the hoax,
That’s all folks,
Merely Putin’s savant
Useful idiot
Still stuffing snakes in the swamp
Hope you rot
Like, a lot
And forgotten in time
We remind ourselves why
You arrived on the scene
To steal one more show
Selfish
American Dream

And I know you work harder
Than I ever have
I just want you to know
Only you would I grab
At the end of the world
All the pieces were falling
And all of my deep inhibitions
Were calling
I’d write to you,
Read to you,
Speak to you
Known
As about me the world
All erodes into stone
And the shown
Is apparent,
Aberrant,
The me within you
Still becoming
The snare in
The trap
When you rapture me close
And I think of you often
Sincerely
My note
Comes to back for you
Doubting you
Even remember
The way that I played with your
Never say never

Decreed to be freed
But in vain
Made to bleed
I can’t read,
I can’t write
And with whites
I can’t breed...
But can still feed their cannibal
Race war machine?

The worsening odds
I will ever attain
What evades
And eludes
To this day
Can’t explain
It was something like
Why even try
To be good
To aspire to more
Than I probably should
When defeat
And let down
In foreboding
Portend
The six feet underground
Can’t come soon enough
End

Tonight I looked into
An overdue doubt
Of mythic proportions
So come check it out

Of this federal system
Reserving its heist
For the terrified hostages'
Crisis zeitgeist

These zodiac killers
Who keep turning pages
In all of these doctrines
Is one for the ages

Immaculate in
It's deception conceptions
Omnipotent forces
Controlling elections

And rigging the game
For the bishops and crooks
To build their empires
On stacks of these books

Which sell like hot cakes  
They claimed were the towers
Of ivory patriots
Sharing their powers

When really the lies
Are as old as the story
Enslaving the masses
Since gold, god, and glory

First hungered for many
A few white horse christians
Waging their wars
Through apocalypse fictions

Then spreading the plagues
With addictive distractions
Dividing the factions
With taxing subtractions

And billing our rights
Constituting their claim
Must govern the people
In image and name

In his kingdom of fear
No home for the brave
When freedom is buried
In salvation's grave

Dug for the masses
And martyr's who bled
From the hole fatal truth
In the back of their head

The underlings stare
In submissive awestruck
Subjugation in landmine-filled
Landfills, are stuck
In the trenches, the feces
The carcass-strewn muck
Where the vermin-spawn ****
As they're taught how to work
And to fend for themselves
Like the Fall of Dunkirk
As the imminent doomsday device overhead
Incapacitates them
As mere prey to a web
Of a global dominion
Ambition connection
Subconscious hive-mind
Buzzing out the objection
And phobia-spreading
Pandemic misanthropy
Greed in disguise
Subsidizing atrocity
Not for me,

I am
The justified treason
The reason the man-hunters
Close open season
The cease-fire peacekeeper
Proliferation
The water war's rising
Desertification
An MIA runaway
AWOL defector
Still haunting the tombs of detente
Like a spectre
With what I assure
Mutually in the end
When I send go-aheads
On the ICBMs
And avenge the dependent expended
Caught in
This crossfire for-profit
Arms race it has been