Know I will hunt you
Beyond
Where you rest
May your legacy
Wither and wane
Dispossessed
Of the power
You lorded
Unmercifully,
Unrelentingly
Binding
The meaning of free
To conditional terms
And relinquishing rights
So we feel more secure
When all turns to black
Sites

Can do
Almost anything now
For a profit
The older I get
The less likely
I stop it
This urge
To encourage
The remonstrance
Resonance
Counter-intelligence
Twisted
Its gifted
Most fervent
Resistance
Enlisting in
Anthropomorphic
Existence

Panicking
Panicking
Vanishing
Sanity
What would I do if she notices
Manic me
Banding together
With dissociation
Untethered
And severed from
All limitation
Though wandering aimlessly
Fathomless depths
Recollecting the cost
Of my countless regrets
In a frenzy
Frenetic
Warp portal
Distortion
Awoken
And dreaming
Without
Disproportion
Beyond
What this vessel
Could ever contain
Unrestrained,
Scatterbrained,
Cogitation
Unchained

When I still use my brain
Find the waves
At the source of it
Radiates
Respirates
Shapes
The discourse of it
Takes
Its exalted,
Alt-ego
Display
And devises
More challenging roles
To portray
More urgent
Admonishment
To beware speech  
Is remembered
But renders
The colors to bleach
So it’s not what I teach
No the words
Must be written
And through divine muses
Bring you to me
Smitten

Light up my vast abyss please
Let me write it
And only
When lonely
Forlornly
Recite it
I’ve been there before
Where the peace becomes war
And in slumber
Restore
Torn from pages
Of Nevermore
Once again
Almost
As always
It fits
If I keep writing out to its
Ghastly misfits

Yea yea
Can barely feel my hands
Yea
Not feeling so well
But I can’t even
Stand
Yea
Still rolling around
Head in the ground
Nowhere to go
No
Can’t think for myself
I need someone else
For I am the foe
Woah
Don’t want to go there,
Can barely repair,
What I did to myself
Thinking lost and alone
Was the progeny flow
And I learned how to turn it
Up into aglow

Ruin me
Leave me eschewed
From indulgence
Removed from
Illumined,
Enlightened
Effulgence
For brightness no longer
Dispels what the dark
Can so harken me back to
And seamlessly spark
Reminiscence
Insistence
On spectral
Temptation
Forsaken
Intruders
From dreams
Reawaken
Retracing my steps
To misplacing regrets
Just reveals
That I feel
Empty nest
Hollow threats
Either change
Or keep feigning
Your value equates
Unconditional love
In two natural-born apes

How proud I have been
Have my head in the wind
And have silenced the sirens
With whom I have sinned
And though kindling
These days
Fell, deforested jungles
She has my whole soul
And the hubris it humbles
The thunder upon
The awaiting oasis
Keeps secrets
In seeking
My moribund waste pits
Embraces me
Equally
Scared or supreme
And then beckons my wanderlust
Back to redeem
What remains of my
Virtuous,
Purposeless
Quest
And my failure
To care
If I pass the attest
To some legacy
Memory
Somehow its haunting me
Long before I
Hyper-sleep in the pod  
Having never found
Such a more flawed
Human god

We don’t know
What makes it
Gives way
To its presence
What manifests
Consciousness
Anyone’s guesses
But please rest assured
Inconclusive is bliss
I suspect
And expect
That the answer to this
Would be nigh on
Inscrutable,
Vexing,
Immutable
Mystery boxes
Whose contents
Unusable
Lose your mind trying,
Go mad with despair,
Clawing frenziedly,
Frantically
Rip out your hair
But your scalp
And your skull
And the null void within
Won’t reveal
Either still
How it makes the head spin
So give in
To the severance
From its
Malevolence
Join me apart
From its self-indulge
Edifice

Now so enamored
I just couldn’t leave
If you left me to die
The loss I still bereave
Furthermore would the memories
Cease to be made
I would give up,
Give in,
Nor again
Try to save
What remains
Of my wayward
Outcast
Unaccomplishment
Mask
Having worn it so long
While pretending to try
I would never again
Let these causes belie
Without her
Just a blur
Between then
And the end
Nothing new though
Oblivion
My oldest friend

But for her
I am lust
And libido
Entrust
Every ******
Of my blade
To the page
And combust
Like a wayward inferno,
A magnified ant,
A Promethean seedling,
A nuclear plant
And my rant
Slash and burn
Still unearthing
Unerring
From Gaia rebirthing
‘Til deathless
Despairing
And wear her depression
Expression
Unvarnished
Full force of her nature
Have I learned to harness
And won’t soon submit
To her profligate
Enemies
Taking her vengeance
To weather extremities
When their atrocities
Go unrepentant
All in
Her empyrean
I am transcendent

Insist I must join
Then cajole me to coin
The new terms
Of my sanctity
Yours to purloin
To purportedly
Read
What goes on in my mind
Is for me to decide
Not derided by others
For even among
Trusted friends
I discover
The silence is tension
Is failure to mention
My unwelcome thoughts
Of complete apprehension

You’d think
I’d run out of ideas
To keep writing
Exhaust the last fume
Of creative igniting
But come gloom and doom
Through the roles
I’m reprising
The constant
Invariable
Is revising
Disguising no longer
What made me this way
It’s as natural to me
As a child at play
Its intricacy
Formed
By simplicity’s
Hand
And it’s guided along
By emotion’s command
Yet unplanned
Like a pregnancy
In love conceived
And reflected upon
Like a widow bereaved
When I once again leave,
Venture on,
Bid adieu
To the words overdue
For the few I write you

Still writing
The sorrow incarnate
Foremost
I’ve been dead to the world
For so long
I’m a ghost
And forlorn
Only shores
Of serenity
Mourn  
Though reborn
In the storm
Of asunder
Am torn
Into equal parts
Heartened
And darkened
By day
So alive
But inside
I’m comprised of decay
Not astray
Anymore
Not afraid
To endure
But the horror
Of losing her
My Nevermore

Seek me
When at your most broken
Dismayed
When you’re lost and alone,
Can’t go home,
Feel afraid
Of revisiting
Past-induced trauma
Familial
When no interlocutors
Ever so willful
A partner
To listen,
Advise,
Recognize
When the silence
Is best
What you choose to confide

Performance anxiety
In the description
The job entails
Failing
The best self depiction
And multiple takes
Multitudinous breaks
From reality
Raising
The trust-falling stakes
For the part to be played
Can be made from organic
Emotions
Inspired
But sync
In Titanic
Romantic delusions
Dramatic displays
And cliff-hanging conclusions
Assuming the love
On a true story based
What its face value
Close up
Maintains when embraced
In its shadowy,
Naked,
Most vulnerable form
Just the same
As in costumes
And make-up
Adorned

I am the dungeon-est
Crab
Random bag
That you grab
When indifference
To existence
Is a hit,
A pull,
A drag
We can’t be all
Devoid of meaning
Surely reason
In believing
Am I wrong?
But what is right?
Who is to say?
I merely write

Look upon you
And see failure
See a scale
Unbalanced
Jailor
Of his own potential
Paler
Than a ghost
Of mostly jokes
To cover up
The drowning hopes
But when you cross the line
The rope’s
Self-deprecation
Is what chokes
You in these notes
Like puffs of smoke
And should you sleight my love again
You’re just another
End I wrote

We need conditions
We need decisions
We need delusions
We need tall tales we tell ourselves
When we walk
So much aimless
Conversing in brief
A line here
A word there
Let’s just go back to sleep

Not much else to it
Just have to undo it
The former conception
Of what defines good
Reservation’s reluctance
Prevents what it could
In some ultimate form
Really mean to another
Or better still
Even you
Yet to uncover

I no longer care
What I think of myself
Insecure in my
Glass house
Of cards I’ve been dealt
But can make of them
Victory
Seamlessly
Scheme with me
Banish dissent
To invent
More machinery
War economics
Is my peace of mind
By design
Histrionics
Employed in my rhyme
Non-aligned to the pact,
The accord,
Nor the treaty
Just break it like bread
Promises
To the needy,
A greedy,
Lascivious
Megalomanic
Discordant purveyor,
Soothsayer
Of panic
Promoter of voter
Fraud
Laud the fine people
On both sides of I’ll
Convince them we’re equal
But we know the truth
There can only be one
Absolute
Who so ruthlessly
Rivals the sun
And when done
With remembrance
Remains in the pages,
Parades and crusades
And the subsequent stages
Prophetic
Magnetic
Charisma
Engages
The masses again
And the muses by pen
Yet the mask
Shall be cast
From my face in the end

And yet still I write
When I’ve nothing else left
When of last shreds
And shards
Of discarded love
Swept
Up away with the fragmented
Memories
Waning
Bereft years ago
Of my life forces
Draining
In vain have my valiant attempts
To be brave
End in ruin
With few more
Befitting the grave
We tried saving each other
One sinks
And one cries
We tried changing each other
One drinks
And one lies
Or we both fall apart
More in unison
Fading
And yet still I write
The pain
Can’t overstating

More Anarchic
Antarctic
Cold War games ensue
As around us
The one at home’s
Losses accrue
And the rest of you
Care more
If Kanye’s a Jew
While impunity reigns
For the fascist charade
We just all play a roll
In the FIFA slave trade
So now show me the binding law
Bent till it’s broken
No free market CAPS
On non-fungible token
Black comedy actors
Miscast
At the back
Of a lack
Of real color
Code switch
Hit of crack
And so let it persist
Mischievous
Can’t resist
If the rights
Don’t apply
To imperiousness
Fortresses of the rich
Sickened kids
In a school
Shooting upper class
Privilege is...
Fool’s Golden Rule

Though haven’t sung yet
Of finality’s
Salary
I am in debt
To its etch-a-sketch
Malady
Turn a few knobs
And we think ourselves
Free
To redraw the line,
Palestine,
Voter ID
But the ballot’s
A salad,
The word
Is a stake
In the heart of my
Blood-*******
Enemy’s fate

Working on
Working you in
To my life
So ineffably grateful
For you in my night
Come alight
The way forward
Evoke me bemused
You’ve renewed
My tomorrow
And heightened the mood
Still I brood
In the belfries,
The gallows,
The hole
And I barren wasteland
What remains of my soul
But I told you
You meant to me
More than goodbye,
Than the most divine
Acid high
Shapes in the sky
More than birds without wings
Could aspire to fly
It’s a little bit more like
Could happily die

Needless to
So much as state
Your biases
Reverberate
Articulate
The puppet parrot’s
Preference
Prejudicial carrot
Deep in darkness
Dare to dread
An audience
Beyond your head
Just reaffirm
The self-assured,
The certitude
Whole truth secured
From extant
Inclinations,
Leanings
To whatever sounds  
Appeasing
Then repeat it back
Again,
Once more until
The journey’s end
Arriving where
You feel at ease
In how we seamlessly
Deceive
Ourselves of answers
Pre-ordained
Instinctive
Linked-in
Lizard brain
Creates the same
Survival mech
Fictitious facts
We’re left to check
Should only ever need arise
To validate the winning side
Of argument’s
Legit disclaimer
Ever will its
Fortunes favor
Me within
No doubt correct
Of answers that I
Architect

Don’t remember
All details
Only how it ends
In fails
Have such profound
Epiphanies
More than a few
Deficiencies
Like some innate
Impulse
To pull
Over their eyes
The veil of wool

She’s smooth to the touch
In the bubbling temptation
Elation incontinent
Patience negation
Keep inching in closer
Inspecting her lips
Dripping wet
In the steamy heat
Taste of her kiss
And it’s like we’re infusing
Converging
And urging
A surge of endorphins
Then soulfully merging
I feel what she thinks
And she thinks what I feel
And for her
All the stars in the sky
Would I steal
Just to bathe in serenity
There in my arms
An embrace that so warms
Me up more
To her charms

Carnivorous culture
Still courting the asp
In control
Just to watch it all
Slip from our grasp
Never pass on the chance
To see carnage
And slaughter
Still waging our wars
For more oil and water
Insatiable lust
To see death and despair
To declare ourselves
Empire gods
Without care
Don’t you dare
Read away
Yet another grim warning
I urge you
Embrace it
Don’t wake up
In mourning
A scorned
Hath no fury Earth
In it adorned

And now I will boast
For my pride is engorged
On abandonment’s ghost
Of the friendships I’ve forged
Through the depths
Ever delving
In deeper
To molten
The curtain of iron
Fist rules
Of the sultan
Could bring the judgmental
Before us
Defined
Could appeal sentimental
Committing the crime
And never so much
As offend
When the pen
That I wield
Ever mightier,
Summons the end

Reach out
Through the screen
Not so naive
To think I save them
Bade them all
A fond farewell
Within the hour
Then I rate them
On a scale of one to five
The session
As a whole
Describe
And should they need me
Come tomorrow
I’ll be back
At anytime

How sleep takes a hold
Of me now
Is astounding
Where formerly
Insomnia
The clock rounding
Unbound
By my childish fears
There is only
Exhaustion by day
And still go to bed lonely
Though not for a lack
Of a special companion
Just prep
For eventually
She might abandon
Me standing there
Fooling myself
To the last
I learn more from then now
Than I do from the past

You don’t know starvation
Salvation encases you
In a cocoon
Metamorphosis rendering
You in a tomb
Or immersed in a banquet
You cannot consume
Not a gleaming, ethereal
Rapturous tune
Some melodic muse meadow
Eternity bloom

When there’s food here to waste
But salvation embraces you
In a suitcase
Destination intending
No final embrace
Nor respite, from the home office
Lifeless escape
Just a go away
Far away
Fade
Happy place

But there’s nothing to eat
As salvation effaces you
In the devoid
When the maker class
Trades human nature
For droid
In an idle mind’s
Workshop
Of captives employed
By the one who evolved
From the God Asteroid

Try as I may
To tame it,
Rein it in
I can’t contain it
Just evade it as a talking point
And silently disclaim it
It’s the same old story
Reimagined
Beast that kills
The beauty pageant
Tragic downfall
Of the hero  
Bank accounts
Reduced to zero
Sheer calamitous
Despair
Sempiternal
My nightmare
Aware it all
Concludes
In nothing
Life itself
A mere MacGuffin
Stuffed inside
A womb
Entombed
Then by oblivion
Consumed

Back in this educate
State of mind
Earning
The title of writer
Inciter of learning
More mutually
Concomitantly
Guessing
The answers
The questions
The overall lessons
I plan so haphazardly
Somehow still getting it
Through to them casually
Just keep it simple
Be honest
Be there
And adroitly instill
This weird skill that I share

Semantics take chances
Like hopeless romantics
And thus my undoing
From love still eschewing
Revealing it feels
Unmistakably
Latent
She knows in her heart
But is stoic
And patient
Awaiting its fall into place
Opportune
More fortuitous
Whereabouts
Over the moon
For her form and mine
Melded
Dispelled the fell
Hell bid
On once upon times
Merely nursery
Rhymes
Just to lose it all gambling
On how she defines

We were the rivals
The antithesis
To offset
The in debt
The left’s clenched
Iron fist
To be squeezed ever tighter
On fruits of the market
Then,
As they starve,
Leave the people in darkness

I’m Mike
And this is my vanity project
The biggest bad bully
This playground
Conceived
A disquiet
Pariah
Orator
Aggrieved
Making ravens of crows
They’ve examined my brain
And yet still no one knows
Quite this kind of insane
Can’t explain
How the wolf
So avails his ambition
On lions
And tigers
And bears
In submission
How impossible precision
Of my mark
Is but a spark
And when you whisper
Wistfully
I am the echo in the dark
Harken back
To the exact
Unambiguous
Conclusion
And if my heart was still intact
I could depart from its
Illusion

Not just a fantasy
This time she’s real
And for once I don’t struggle
To feel how I feel
To reveal to her
All of my intimate
Darkness
Foreboding
Corroding my carcass
No more
She is coding
The mode of my mood
To conclude
Its exhuming
For good
Lay my demons to rest
In her soothing
Serenity
Melody
Sweet as sincerity
Piecing the fragments
Of dismembered memory
Back to reform
To adorn me in solace
Yet still not quite certain
In love
She would call this

For shadows are most
Inhospitable hosts
When you revel in devils
And settle for ghosts
You will always see evil
Subsuming the good
And consumed in delusion
Forgetting it could
All quite possibly,
Nay
Almost certainly be
All contained in your head
A threadbare
Lunacy

At least now
I get back to this
Mired in meaningless
Never the writer
I thought I would be
Just the one
Who gets by
On emotionally
Unapproachably
Truculent
Daily dose supplement
Of my deficient
Self-worth
Ego shattering
Into a million persona
Brains splattering
All across
Can’t carry on
Not the same
But my noose is indifference
The rope is existence
Resistance again
My futility pen
Proudly pressing its muses
To paper
To savor
Unfortunate cycles
Of bliss turned to anger
Whenever I fail
To maintain
The “my” concept
Own up to the tragic flaw
There from the onset

It’s almost like
There could be blissful
Amidst
The conflictual
Phantasmagoric
Abyss
Like a day
I don’t want to die
Nearly as much
The resultant
Residual
Remnant of trust
I’ve adjusted
According
To where she would stand
Were I poor,
Powerless
With no titles and land
Just a man
With a hand
For composing discord  
With this pain as my shield
And this pen as my sword

Inward seeking
Shrinking violet
Red dwarf
Morphing
Into silent
Shades evade
Intrusive gaze
A spotlight on
An empty stage
Arrayed for how I play
The role
Of one’s so growing older
Soul
Where love is found
Less in caress
But more in what
I can’t express

Have I done enough
Thinking
For both of us now
My accomplishments
Nothingness
Still don’t know how
I could ever be down
For a down-payment town
For submission
Conditioned
To bow to the crown
Never found
The unbound
To its soaked in blood ground
I remain
My remains
As the Earth spins around
Not demanding my presence
But yet nonetheless
She accepts me
Addresses me
An
Honored guest

Somehow still plenty
Of energy left
Fell asleep on the couch
Then into my bed crept
Like a crypt for the restless
Upon which I write
With increasingly recent
Infrequency
Nightly
Entire day typing
Like lightning
A living
Is humble and honest
Yet fraught with misgiving
I taught
More tautology
Wrought my own ends
As I sought the renewing
Undoing it pens

Now feel it flow through you
The upper
Class privilege
And rip it to shreds
In your miscreant mischief

Still so much without you
Not so much as doubt you
Could ever be there
When I wasn’t awake
Looking on as we’ve had ourselves
Lost in the quake
But await me no further
I’m bound to beside
You can hide.
You can bide.
All your time
In my mind
I’ll be there when you realize
At the end tides
There is no other rising up
Save our demise
Let me hear it be sung
Into walls of night shrieked
Let me watch
As it ruins
The siege In retreat
For no storming advance
Of tempestuous furies
Could stray from the favor
I wager on juries
On people
The equal
No more
And no less
But to me
She is everything
This can’t express

Why not just leave me
Alone all those years
You could see in me
Something
That seldom appears
Rearing its ugly head
Soon of late
On a date
Yet she even sees peace
In my war
Mental state