There are many reasons I can't hate you.
It's not your fault you are the way you are.  
Love is something you're not accustomed to,
So I'll learn to love you from afar.  

I can't hate you because I'm more to blame,
I let myself trust you thinking I would be okay.
Thinking about it, felt like shame.
But that all changed on that one cold day..

You showed me another side to our situation,
I am not yours and you, not mine.  
Our lives are not on the same vibration,
And that is perfectly fine.

I've learned to let go, of the past and present.
What presently doesn't do good, I let go of
I won't settle for any discontent.
All things I do, I do with love.

It's almost as if my head is surround by fog,
I don't know which way is up or which way is down.  
My mind has been playing tricks on me
Making me feels things unusual to myself.  
Which way is up and which way is down?
If I choose while I'm this Blind who knows what can happen.
At this point it's chance, fate, what's meant to be.  
Will be.  
Faith and prayer will get me through this turmoil.
Just don't let the fog win.

My tears stem from a place far beyond reach.As much as I try to follow the river of my emotion to its source, it's hidden like buried treasure.  Bits and pieces of memories and hurt flash into my thoughts from time to time.  It reminds me of the most darkest places Ive been in my life. Most importantly it reminds me to keep looking ahead.  I can dwell on my past consistently, mindlessly causing myself turmoil. Causing me to predict my own downfall and destruction. In reality, what I predict only happens because I expect it to.  How can I expect myself to change or grow when I'm constantly doubting my own being and potential.  I was placed on this Earth for something much bigger than my mind can even fathom; we all are. The one common mission we were all entrusted with is to spread and to be love. Except we not only need to spread love to all those around, but we need to accept it as well. The darkest place that we as humans can experience in our minds is insecurity. Insecurity can lead us down an unintended road of hurt.  It can stem from the people in your surroundings, yes, but the worst comes from within. So many people take experiences that are out of their control and constantly wound their own hearts with hurt. You can lie to yourself all you want about how you aren't good enough and if you were only a certain way you would see change and happiness Sprout into your life. That is one hundred percent a lie. Happiness truly does come from within, it stems from a place of purpose.  Once you realize that you are not just coincidentally born into a magical planet that happens to be suspended in the middle of an endless universe, you will find happiness. The reason being that at that moment, you will  understand there has, is and will always be something bigger and more complex working in your favor.  You realize you hurt because you are in the process of a bigger lesson to be learned, and these lessons will allow you to help others to heal as well.  You realize you are not alone in this world, there is always someone hearing your hurt and wishing you just understood how beautiful you are inside and out . From there you start to realize you are and can and will be the change that needs to be seen, but it all starts from a place within. So starting today I'm making a change in this world, and it's starting with myself.  No more doubt, fear, or discomfort in the essence of my God created being.  I was made to look, feel, love, hurt and care exactly the way I do now. Denying the fact that I was made in the most perfectly imperfect way, to me, is equivalent to denying my whole existence.  I am who I am and I will attract those that are meant to stay, those that will help me grow and even those that will cause me hurt.  But in the end it will all be the same; lessons.  Lessons of trust, deceit, love, friendship and fallacies. But knowing this, that every experience is beneficial to you in some type of way, you start to see that miracles happen every breathing second that you're alive. Thus, slowly this world will start to change and we can one day evolve into the love that God intended for us all

Even though I placed myself here,
Wandering why I feel neglect and sorrow.  
My feelings are always sincere,
Even with no garuntee tomorrow.  

I've come to realize  that the hurt is much deeper,
Deeper than I myself can even fathom.  
But life moves on and hills get steeper,
You just got to go out and charge ‘em.  

Hurt doesn't always stick around,
It likes to choose its victims wisely.
Once you let your negativity become unbound,
You stop treading through life blindly.  

Take joy in those little moments that **** a tear,
That means you're alive !
Just go with the flow my pretty little dear,
Don't let them break your strive!

Letting my mind unfold
I see how the treasures of the universe are untold
Curious thoughts course through my veins
And I ask that God remove my stains

"The world can be cruel and unforgiving," he speaks
"but my beautiful child wipe those tears off your cheeks."
All of a sudden I feel a sense of light around my soul,
as if my own mind was no longer in control.

My doubts and fears were released
And deep inside I was no longer a tortured beast
I had found my purpose in this life we all share
and I see people no longer living in despair

You see my beautiful people around the Earth
All it takes is a mindset re-birth
Change the way you see this beautiful place
and we can spread the love all across space

Smile at a stranger that you've never known,
they may have hurts never to be shown.
Help out someone in need of a kind heart,
and when there's peace in this world, we were the start

<3

It takes Just one kiss that reaches the stomach
And explodes into a million fluttering butterflies
It takes toll on your mind
And suddenly your floating in a sea of clouds
When did this happen?
When did you reach your own heaven?
When You found love
And love found you
You’re stuck in this seemingly endless game of emotions
Ups and down, twists and turns
You stay exactly where you are
Simply because you love the storm itself
For months the storm blows on
You’re blinded by love and passion
You don’t care that the storm is slowly killing you
You’re losing yourself without knowing where your going
One day this storm stops,
It’s all collapses on itself and the words are said
“It’s over”
The two words that cut deeper than knives
When did this happen?
When did you reach your own hell?
You got heart broken
And you are broken
You’re stuck in this seemingly endless depression
Nothing makes you happy
You have no energy to try and make yourself feel
You’re stuck
Days roll on and weeks speed by
You’re numb to anything and everything
You lose friends and lose sanity
You just don’t care
But Just when you think you’ll never find happiness it comes
You giggle a little more
People fall in love with your smile again
And love, you are okay
You start to realize you’re beautiful in your own way
Someday someone will do anything to be yours
You’ll find peace with yourself
And you will have the love of your life when it’s meant to be
Just hold in there

I’m lost,
And maybe in the end I really don’t know what I’m doing.
But I don’t care,
I’m going to find my way.
Every trial I face will make me stronger.
Every mountain I encounter, I will climb.
Every star I see, I will reach.
There’s nothing in my way now,
Except my endless disappointment in myself.
And there’s my problem,
Self confidence.
Always blaming others to diminish my own destruction.
But the truth is, I have control.
I have the right to say, no you’re wrong.