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This poem is for
You
You who spoke in words that
sprouted flowers of hope

And I picked each one

Like a disrespectful little girl
walking through the gardens of her
various neighbors on the way
home from school

And I inhaled that scent perfumes
only dream of producing

You didn’t stop
So neither did I

And then you did.

This poem is for
You
You who I thought would never be
a poem

But you are now
For even flowers of hope
wilt

This poem is for
You
You who taught me more than 13
years of public schooling
You who was no different
You who left

I hate you
I do.
I hate that you convinced me to
listen
Convinced me to
grow
I hate that I have to avoid my
voicemail box
And that you can’t respond
I hate you






I don’t.
A big **** you for
He
who left his
memories
sprinkled like
Ashes
Tossed into the ocean on a
brisk, fall day
Throughout my life
Under my  covers,
On my skin,
In my scent,
On my doorstep,
On every person that meant something to you,
when I meant something to you

I do not hate you
I couldn’t possibly
I simply hate the power you have to possess me to whine after all this
time
Time
TIME
Like your tapping foot when you got restless,
Your cracking thumb when you got comfortable

One day
When all is passed and I have found a semblance of
Happiness

You will remember
thoughts are transmitted
via translucent dragonfly mosquitos
from the angeled mountains of an ancient africa
to the plagued fountains of a new chimerica
miracles of disease and possibility in this
naked play they bear
fruitwords
juicing gifts of malleable meaning clothes for being or
chains, chainings
and so you are
water and messaging
carried all from timelands so distant & vague you are forever a
vague and distant stranger to your self.

when a man or woman is cut
wide, and deep enough
they bleed
despair
and with the desperate drops flows all the
thought force of all the riversrunnininthabellyod'earth.
in these despedrops
the flickerin' reflexions of starbirds turn banal to beauty
meaning
dangerously alive
in them the wombman is mirrored countless
countless times each a
split second in their life a
minute detail in their endless skies.

today i made
upon leaving home
a wish
that an image would come to stand frozen
across my peepholepupil
of what it will not matter;
and that some one, whomever,
a dancer, a ***,
would come to stand staring
just intentsly enough
to have this moist unmatter
touch to fill their own eye.

this has all happened, just now, a blink before our ending -
all of it, together, when you told me
ah feigned casualty:
it's the sweetness that kills you
or was it
yr perfect just the way you are.

at the last i followed your passing with my gaze as your wake
the most intensfool one i could ever make
as your backs became horizons i
turned tilting to the old borderline
it stood as ever sealing the sea -
sealing a sea that heeeaved against the
plentyfullpollutionoftheshorelinepowerplantplantation inc smoke sky
beyond a wind oh
my window, ours
the wind wowed with that old border time
i saw the blue behemeoth
spotted four white dots in crescent form
and you see, looking through thus windowed i simply could not say
were they sailboats, fallenserapheathers
or reflexions of those electricpearlights upon waxfloressence
from the waning walls of the halls you just walked
out of
time
all around me
wail the waking walls of a maze my hazedazedgaze
your never.
 Apr 2012 Mellanie N Covell
Zoe
you have grasped my fake smiles
you sense the anger behind my eyes
you feel discomfort when my laugh is pushed
you know me too well
let me just say
let me play the part
let me pretend to be
fine
i know you see *******
and once we're done talking
allow me to smile
for the others
who don't quite see what you see
please let me say
i'm fine
 Apr 2012 Mellanie N Covell
Zoe
17
 Apr 2012 Mellanie N Covell
Zoe
17
if only we had met last year
or this year
how happy we would be
how amazing life would be
how uncontrollably in love
we would be
 Apr 2012 Mellanie N Covell
Zoe
don't scream
and tell me nothing is wrong
don't sigh
and say nothing is on your mind
don't yell
and speak nothing of which makes sense
don't lie
and say its the truth
don't hesitate
and tell me everythings okay
just speak to me
 Mar 2012 Mellanie N Covell
Zoe
your grip of my mind
constricts my heart
to where i cant breathe
i feel faint
weak
as if death is near
your grip of my memories
pulls my heart
to where it barely pumps
i feel weird
out of it
as if im not here
you have way too much control
over my unstable heart
that seems to not be working
i feel death
darkness
as if im no more
 Mar 2012 Mellanie N Covell
Zoe
the twigs under my shoes
breaking
snapping
the sound i would love to hear
come out of your spine
the leaves crumble
and muffle
under my shoes
the sound i would love to hear
come out of your mouth
the rocks kicked
across the floor
the image i would love to see
with your spiraling head
the ants climbing up my shoes
as i would love to see
you grab me for last hope
simmering fires within,
bring body, mind,and soul alive;
fire in ***** is desire, digestive fire-
energizes; *soul, a solitary flame.
meeting you
was destiny

becoming your friend
was a choice

falling in love with you
was beyond my control
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