Why do we put so much pressure
On others?
Waiting around for
Friends, family,
That one person who's on our Facebook and we can't remember why,
To accomplish great things so we can praise them.
Graduating high school,
Entering college,
Joining the workforce,
Falling in love - -
Why are these things on our to-do lists?
These aren't some mindless tasks,
This is life.
What if we took all that
And pushed ourselves harder?
Where would that get us?

You're the only one
I've ever known
In the way that I knew you.
You were the one always
On my mind and in my thoughts.
So, now that I'm trying to remove
You,
It's as if I'm missing something.
Something I've always known and
Always had.
Getting over you
Turns out to be a much larger
Task than I ever had imagined.
I don't think about you,
Then I hear a song,
And there you are
As if you want to be there
But aren't doing anything to
Prove it.

All I've ever been trying to do
Is selflessly love you.

But I've come to realize,
It's hard to continue to love someone,
When you don't know if they love you back.

When we parted
I didn't realize
How long that would be
And what it meant
When we didn't even say "goodbye"
Was it because we didn't want to?
I know I didn't.
Eight entire months
Nothing.
So I show up where I knew you'd be
And you didn't hesitate
Smiles, a hug, light, joking conversation.
And it all "came flooding back" -
As cliche as that is.
But it's true.
So now that I'm here still,
And you're not,
We're back to that silence.
So excuse me for being confused
And conflicted,
I should have made it clear
That I really want this.
I just need to know if
You do too.

I want
To be with you
So often
And so long
That we run out of things to talk about.
And that's okay
Because then everything has been said.  
Because even just being with you will be
Enough.
Let's climb on the roof
To watch the sunrise
And lay in the grass tonight
To see the stars.
Let's stay in  
And eat macaroni
Because we're never too old for that.
Let's just be us.
And just us, together,
Will be the best thing,
Forever.

Here I am
In the dark, black of my bedroom
And I blink
Over
And over
To flush the tears from my eyes
And remind myself to focus and see
All that isn't in front of me

It's easier to notice
Your flaws
When others point them out.
So why on earth
Would you be
One of those people
To yourself?

m.p.