You talked about him
with your heart melting
into your words.

You looked at him
with stars shining and
twinkling in your eyes.

Now you talk about him
with disgust and a
sudden hatred.

And your eyes no longer
twinkle, but leak the tears
of what was not meant to be.

Every now and then
I become 10 years old

I'm laying in my parents bed
melting into worn sheets and heavy blankets

I can hear my sister on the phone
she's chatting about some math test

The walls were always thin

I can hear my mother with the vacuum
and my father and brother cooking breakfast

They are toasting english muffins
and scrambling eggs

The bacon is sizzling
and the hash browns are crispy

I can smell it now as it floods my house
seeping into the hallway and into the room

The birds outside are singing
and the sunlight is golden as it carresses
my weary, aged eyes

But I am 10 right now
my shoulders have no weight to carry

And I feel as though I am one with the wind
slowly floating away from where I should be,
back towards home.

I have never been one for romance
I never really know what to do
but I long for the chance
to make an advance
and dance to silence with you.

I'm sure at first it'd be funny
we'd look at each other and laugh
we'd swing and we'd sway
we'd dance every way
and cherish the love that we have.

For the silence we hear
Is not the absence of words
But rather things we need not say.
We both already know
How our hearts have been connected
From the very start up til today.

So I may not be a love song
But I'll show you in every way that I know
Til the day that we're gone
You'll know you belong
Like the flowers that bloom in the meadow.

It has rained for the past few days. The clouds have hung low and water darkened my world. The cold seeped through my coats and the wind constantly attacked.

But today I saw the sun. The ground is drying up and the water is fading. The cold doesn't hurt as much and the wind is much softer.

As much as I love the rain, I feel like this is a new beginning for me. One where I get to see the light everyday. One where I am thankful to be alive.

If I have ever been so sure of something
its's that I have loved you
in every lifetime I've lived
and every lifetime I have yet to.

There is a certain solace in the rain.
Let it fall upon you and soak into your clothes
Let it seep into your flesh and bones.
Feel the chill spread across yourself.
That is the feeling of being alive
That is how you know you feel.
That is how you know you are alive.

Sweet and soft your voice is
as it calms my aching heart

and as I lie awake
wondering how I was so lucky
as to have met you
in this lifetime
                                                                
I come to the conclusion
we were stars together
many years ago
                                                                          
and decided
that time was not enough

we were destined
to find our fingers interlocked
as our hearts pulled us
together.

And at the very end of it all
I will have decided
that everything was only ever you.

There’s a certain bitterness in growing up
It’s being angry at the world for it wanting you to change
For expecting you to keep up
When you still haven’t grown into your shoes
They’re still tied with bunny ears

To be honest I was gonna try to write a sappy love poem but all I could come up with was:

I am very happy you're here with me.

You can ask anyone who knows me
I have never been the best at remembering things
I leave my thoughts scattered across the coffee table in my head
But when it comes to you my dear
You are just too important to forget

What a feeling to want to say everything so sincerely that there'll never be another doubt again

I hope you tell your friends about me
and I hope they're as happy for you
as The Moon is for me
when she listens to my stories of you
every night.

Every time I look into your eyes,
I see a future I could stare at
forever

I can't listen to music anymore while I study.
My thoughts are loud enough on their own.

And I let them consume me.
Bite away until I'm nothing more than those very thoughts
leaking out of my head.

Even though we may one day
burn out in one big blast of light
I hope those who come after
will see our love from millions of miles away
as vast, bright, and infinite.

Silence
is
the
space
between
what
is,
and
what
could
be.

I've decided that there is nothing brighter in this world than you.

In my dreams I am transported to a different world
A flower field bathed in golden light as the sun decides to go to sleep.
And in this world I meet her. She’s just a fragment now.
Slowly been carried away by the wind. Nothing more than a mere shadow.
I sit with her and hold her hand. She asks me to stay with her
She doesn’t want to go away. I trace her fingers which are so much smaller than mine
The gold has now faded into the night as she decides to go to sleep.
This will be the last time I meet her.
I can no longer hold her hand. Yet I ask her to stay with her.
I don’t want her to go away. Her voice is soft and kind, bringing warmth that I'll never feel again.
I look across her big bright eyes and I see myself in them and then
I am back home.

And if the Greek myth about soulmates being two parts of one former person was to be true,

I would only know of it's verity in the way that we have so much in common that we must have been one at some point.

I have never been good
at being someone people would choose
in a crowded room.

I am the smell of rain
and the ticking of a clock.

I am a slight breeze
and a fleeting glance through a window.

I have never been good
at sticking around
long enough to know I am worth
being stuck with.

Oh what a feeling to miss someone who isn't even gone

I have spent my whole life
believing
that I would never find love.

I have spent my whole life
resigned
to a fate I created in my own mind.

But

I've decided to spend the time I have now
trying
to realize that I'll find love someday.

I've decided to spend the time I have now
learning
that the first step is finding love in myself.

You make me want to try.

We are something out of a storybook
A hastily written plot to keep the reader's attention
A love story to wring out their hearts
Honey, it was written in the stars
That we would never be
We are destined to burn out thousands of years
before we even saw each other

But oh, my dear, it's like the entire world feels right
Whenever I see you
You are every melody I’ve ever heard
And every hope i've ever held
You feel like stargazing and sunsets
If I have ever been so sure of something
Its that I have loved you in every lifetime I’ve lived
And every lifetime I have yet to

We may not be here tomorrow morning
We might be dragged away by the turn of the page
But you gave me twice as many stars as usual
And for the short time we were under them
We spent our whole lives with each other

I have always loved Vincent Van Gogh and his art.

Whenever I gazed upon those vivid colors as a child,
my imagination would paint me my own pictures
of dancing on golden stars and ambling through flower fields of bleeding hues.

Now when I look at them, I picture the tragedy of a man who loved the world in a way that was much too complex for us to understand.

Was there ever a time, Vincent, where you truly  felt whole?
Or were you always desperate to find peace?