i didn't scream at your face i didn't punch you i didn't bleed i didn't stand up for myself i didn't just leave i didn't never come back oh how i wish that i did
i didn't hide the cuts on my legs i thought you maybe saw them i then hid them i hid the bruises over my knuckles i don't think you saw them i stopped hiding the bruises i'm not scared of hitting you in self defence instead of a brick wall that won't fight back
"i know you hate this, but it's not hurting you"* maybe not physically exactly but the mental hurt did cause physical hurt in the end you just don't know
in had a childlike innocence i loved you the first thirteen years of my life yeah, i did love you mum now my innocence and free love has run out, it's gone now you want my love? it's your turn to earn it i'm not giving it to you unconditionally
i'm feeling really fragile delicate and brittle easy to break and finely painted on mostly pale with pastel color please don't d r o p me to shatter on the ground be gentle with the fine china
but i don't think i deserve it so i'll continue saying "i'm sorry" because i really am but instead of forgiveness i'd accept a knife in my back because i am so so so sorry don't forgive me
are dedicated to you you caused them i just wish you kept them but you wouldn't know the cause was you and you won't be sorry i'm not asking you to be you don't know what's wrong and i won't tell you either
your hair fell into your eyes but you didn't brush it away you left it there covering your eye it was so cute (i love you) but i hated that you left it there and i wasn't able to brush it away it tortured me please don't leave it there just move it away for me please end my torture of not being able to move it
i'm stressing just a lil bit i think thats why my stomach is doing flips because i'm stressing even a lil nervous okay a lot but this stressing might be the cause of my flipping stomach and squeezing heart i don't think its overly healthy for my body to be flipping or squeezing it hurts just a lil bit
i told you about the stupid thing I did i'm sorry, i know it was stupid i just hope pray, wish that my stupid thing doesn't cause you to do an equally stupid thing i'm sorry it was a stupid thing to do
it hurts there no, higher than my rib bones lower than my coller bone a little to the left of my breast bone there right where my heart beats that's where the pain is what pills can i take to help the pain?
this morning i chased my thoughts away with physical pain this afternoon i chased my pain away with mental guilt this night i chased my guilt away with literal tears
i watched your internet videos i cried at the sound of your voice tears tumbled out i need you to hold me love, please hold me tightly i think we both need it
why do i live?why do i live?why do i live?why do i live?why do i live?why do i live?why do i live?why do i live?why do i live?why do i live?why do i live?why do i live?why do i live?why do i live?
no, if "god" existed/cared i wouldn't be alive someone is lying i don't care for the truth anymore but i shouldn't be alive
you traversed this unchartered land you have the only map you found the sinkholes and a v i o d e d them you noticed the catching vines that e n t a n g l e and t r i p you discovered the deepest rivers and s w a m a c r o s s them you climbed the mountains w i t h o u t any a s s i s t a n c e you were confronted by the monsters which you f a u g h t and w o n you found the treasure you r e c o v e r e d my h e a r t
guard the map engraved into your heart and keep the treasure close also
you look so beautiful in the morning you're mostly vulnerable yet not fragile just unhidden there's no guarded look there's no armbands covering you there's no mask it's just you nothing to hide, and love... you're *beautiful
you looked surprised and frustrated then dad made a comment like "see she can laugh" and you growled for me to go to bed (10:57pm) i wouldn't sleep anyway what you didn't see was by the time you couldn't see my face tears had began to trickle down my cheeks faster and faster until i lay down and let them all f a l l
you're the best person ever i love you not in that romantic way, not exactly i love you like more than family no, you are my family, my chosen family a family of one lets keep it that way
thankyou family of one for always being the best i love you x