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Aug 2013 · 723
sorry
Aug 2013 · 467
sorry
Aug 2013 · 324
a dead light
maybella snow Aug 2013
that dark pipe that
             connects us
i remember a light
                at the end
        where i'd only
have to travel to it
      and everything
      would be okay
                       again

your light died
you're gone
you aren't coming back
your life died
Aug 2013 · 380
i'm okay with feeling empty
maybella snow Aug 2013
5 words


*i've been filled, and emptied
Aug 2013 · 320
even mum has noticed
maybella snow Aug 2013
my face is pale                
my eyes red and puffy  
my smile's gone              
the colour i had
in the happiness of you
is gone
maybella snow Aug 2013
[screaming]                         [screaming]                       [screaming]      [screaming]        
[scream]               [scream]     [scream]  [scream]           [scream]                           [scream]            
[screams]   [screams]                            [screams]     [screams]                       [screams]                              
[screamed]                  [screamed]             [screamed]           [screamed]  [screamed] [screamed]

*[screaming]                         [screaming]                       [screaming]      [screaming]        
[scream]               [scream]     [scream]  [scream]           [scream]                           [scream]            
[screams]   [screams]                            [screams]     [screams]                       [screams]                              
[screamed]                  [screamed]             [screamed]           [screamed]  [screamed] [screamed]
maybella snow Aug 2013
i really need to scream
all          these
emotions out
maybella snow Aug 2013
everything
everything
everything
everything
everything
in my head
  goes back
           back
           back
   and back
to you
                                      every
                                       time
you're
hurting
me
i
cant
write
any
good
poetry
go
away
pleas­e
and
let
me
write
i really am sorry everyone
maybella snow Aug 2013
but letting you completely in my heart again
scares me more
maybella snow Aug 2013
how do you continue
to           muddle
                                mess
            combine
the thoughts
       emotions
                                             everything
in my head
so it has
everything
to do with you
                          always
maybella snow Aug 2013
i've been
           so close
to crying
                                            so many
                            times today
                                    it is
                                             really quite
                      sad
Aug 2013 · 370
a lonely dear
maybella snow Aug 2013
stuck in the headlights
                        a cold night fogs
lost in white light
    the fog was transformed from a
        comforting damp blanket
into  a  white
impenetrable
wall of smog
                              a lonely dear
                         hears traffic everywhere
                                   but the wall
                                                                      pushes her back
              so she turns and runs
                                 lost with the noise
                         and bright white
                                                                     there's always
                                                             a loud screech
                                                     before impact
a lonely dear
lost in white
dies slowly
at the crime scene

————i'm a such a deer————
dear and deer swapped purposefully
maybella snow Aug 2013
10 words



*i'll fight whoever for it, i need my love back
Aug 2013 · 267
i am alone
maybella snow Aug 2013
nothing feels right
to be felt in
the misshapen body
i'm stuck in
no one see or hears              
the horrid thoughts
that are in my head
no one knows                      
how alone i feel      
no                                          
you cant know                        
because
you're not
me
Aug 2013 · 454
yeah don't
maybella snow Aug 2013
sitting uncomfortably in my skin
you tell me i'm not alone in how
i seem to be feeling, with every-
thing  thats going on. i don't   kn-
ow  about  that,  i  feel  alone, so
alone that all i want is him,  back
you tell me never to talk  to  him
because he hurt me,  but he  ma-
de me feel  so  special and loved
no  one  else  has  made  me  feel
that  way,  yet  you  tell  me you'
ll  forever  hate  me  if  i  start  a
conversation  with  him,     only
because  he  hurt  me,  but what
if  he  wants  me  back?  he loves
me,    he  never  stopped  loving
me,    why  wouldn't  i  want  to
talk  to  the  love  of  my life? it's
in  my  nature,  soul, heart, body
to  be  with  someone  who  just
so   happens   to   love  me   with
their everything, as i love   them,
with my  everything  its just  not
fair,    that    you're   allowed   to
complain  about  how  that   guy
you  like  has  ruined  your   life,
because    of   whatever   he  did,
yet i'm  not  allowed to cry once,
or  talk  to my  love   because  of
your views on our   relationship,
how  is  that  fair?  you're  upset-
ing me so much, i bet you didn't
know    that    though    did   you?
Aug 2013 · 387
yeah don
maybella snow Aug 2013
sitting uncomfortably in my skin
you tell me i'm not alone in how
i seem to be feeling, with every-
thing  thats going on. i don't   kn-
ow  about  that,  i  feel  alone, so
alone that all i want is him,  back
you tell me never to talk  to  him
because he hurt me,  but he  ma-
de me feel  so  special and loved
no  one  else  has  made  me  feel
that  way,  yet  you  tell  me you'
ll  forever  hate  me  if  i  start  a
conversation  with  him,     only
because  he  hurt  me,  but what
if  he  wants  me  back?  he loves
me,    he  never  stopped  loving
me,    why  wouldn't  i  want  to
talk  to  the  love  of  my life? it's
in  my  nature,  soul, heart, body
to  be  with  someone  who  just
so   happens   to   love  me   with
their everything, as i love   them,
with my  everything  its just  not
fair,    that    you're   allowed   to
complain  about  how  that   guy
you  like  has  ruined  your   life,
because    of   whatever   he  did,
yet i'm  not  allowed to cry once,
or  talk  to my  love   because  of
your views on our   relationship,
how  is  that  fair?  you're  upset-
ing me so much, i bet you didn't
know    that    though    did   you?
Aug 2013 · 448
fragments written on my arm
maybella snow Aug 2013
a life was lost to love
                     why love when hearts are so fragile?
       i covered my arm with the ink of my pen
       rather than the usual blood with a blade
                              love is lost in the world, i'm just a grain of sand
where'd all the
beauty of the
world go?
i think it
died when
you did
                                  dreams and reality are all nightmares in the end
Aug 2013 · 545
i wrote a poem on my arm
maybella snow Aug 2013
bogeymen are                                                         its hard to
no longer hiding                     where'd                        remember
in your cupboards                 all the                     that i'm alive
or under your beds                   beauty                           some days
they're hidden in                       go?                         because i feel
the depths of                                                         so dead
your dark mind                                                        on the                                i want to replace
ready to jump out                                                        inside                        the blood in my veins
and cause the                            a lonely poetess                                                with ink
self hate that ends                   sits in a pool of blood
in blood covered
blades
many different fragments, read by font, not line
Aug 2013 · 370
i'm done//sigh
maybella snow Aug 2013
****//everything hurts//cant breathe//****//help//crying//ugh//no//i love you//ugh
Aug 2013 · 530
i wanna be a tree
maybella snow Aug 2013
standing against the wind
shading people                  
creating air for the world  
growing leaves                  
small green sprouts          
blooming flowers              
dropping seeds                  
roots extended into the ground                  
as my leaves slowly change                  
to colours of red, orange                  
yellow, brown                  
to loose my luxurious leaves
as they dance
and fall around my trunk
swirling in the wind
until i'm bare
and i have time to            
sleep during winter            
waiting to blossom
and my leaves to grow
once again                      
and i can shade people
Aug 2013 · 386
don't take it personally
maybella snow Aug 2013
these are all just
my unedited thoughts
Aug 2013 · 404
you silly girls
maybella snow Aug 2013
stop posting
                pictures/
  videos of
yourself
mostly naked
           or simply
just naked
         how do you
expect anyone
           to respect you?
if you don't
                respect yourself
enough to
keep your
clothes on
in front of
the camera
Aug 2013 · 269
winter trees
maybella snow Aug 2013
bare of leaves
i wonder
if they
     get cold in winter
          so cold
that they
       forget who/what
                   they once were
how do they
          remember
  to grow
            in spring?
maybella snow Aug 2013
everyone
let        
me  
be
maybella snow Aug 2013
10 words


*and if you are, i don't want to know you
Aug 2013 · 612
school friends (sea gulls)
maybella snow Aug 2013
i haven't eaten anything
at school in a week
and the one day
i bring something
                                            it's gone
taken by a "friend"
who just wanted food
and happened to notice
i had some in my hand
                                 i bet
          they didn't notice
               i haven't eaten
                         anything
                        in a week
today
the sea gulls
stole my food
Aug 2013 · 426
maybe it's a bad thing
maybella snow Aug 2013
that it has been so long
and i've refused to look
at all the pictures
cute messages
                  that you gave me
     complete with an "x"
and "i love you"
                but it just hurts
                way too much
                to think about
                your life                or more importantly
                your death
not ready
i'm just
not ready
to see or
remember
your life
not yet
maybella snow Aug 2013
you're
in every
dream
10 words including title
maybella snow Aug 2013
as my brain fogs up
and my breath struggles              
throat closes                      
my hands clench air
as my muscles shake  
and a shudder rips through me      

i need you                                                                            
just to hold me                                                                            
rub my back,                                                                            
and hold my                                                                            
clenched hands,                                                                            
lay me down                                                                            
and hold me.                                                                            
kiss my cheeks                                                                            
nose, lips, eyelids                                                                            
and hold me.                                                                            
nothing needs to                                                                            
be said,                                                              
just hold me until
everything's okay
until the pain leaves  
until i can think again
until i notice you        
holding me
i'll return                      
all the kisses
hugs, hand holding
i'll return every minute
of you holding me
with me holding you
every time you need
to be held
i'll hold you
until you sleep
if you hold me
to sleep tonight
Aug 2013 · 528
[teleports]
maybella snow Aug 2013
if i          
i could 
i would
[teleports]
to you
maybella snow Aug 2013
just        
hold  
me
     *tonight
10 words including title
Aug 2013 · 608
restless without you
maybella snow Aug 2013
nothing i do
is calming me down
like every time
i talk to you
you have an effect on me                                      
where i immediately feel so                  
much better                                                    
a ball of                                    
nervous energy                        
buzzing and shaking          
i'm waiting
waiting
waiting
always waiting
for you to be here
to simply talk to me
just that                                                
talking to me                                                
well you mostly singing
and me sitting
we don't exactly talk
we exist                    
together

i think, that                                      
is what calms me                                      
a sense that
maybe i'll be
whole again
maybe
*???
maybella snow Aug 2013
to be held until you fall asleep
and wake up with them still holding you

to know the noises they make before sleep
and wake to their morning noises

to mumble adoring words until you cant anymore
and wake knowing they're all true

to fall asleep with their scent embracing you
and wake covered in it and still smelling that way after showers

i wonder what that would be like
i wonder why i keep torturing myself with this
Aug 2013 · 338
can't handle anything
maybella snow Aug 2013
i'm ready to
bash my head
against a wall

i'm about to
cut my wrists
with a blade

i just want
my death to be
sooner rather
than later
Aug 2013 · 328
i tried
maybella snow Aug 2013
nothing is in my head
                                          i cant think
                                                  because i                                                                           banished
thoughts
to a place                                                          
             where it doesn't
      think of poems
or maybe
there are too many                                  
for me to get a single one
                                                                               ...written down...
maybe they're just
tooentangled to free
themselves
fromthismess
ofamind
Aug 2013 · 281
i can't hear it now
maybella snow Aug 2013
remember that time
         you gave me a song
said "you have to
listen to it!"

                             so of course i did
                             and i fell in love with it
                             just as i fell in love with you
for weeks
      months
                                              ­      it was the song
                                                            ­ that was us
maybe our love was forever
                     i cry every night
          that you didn't make it
                       to our "forever"
i've stopped
listening to it
it hurts
                                     i'm still waiting
                            for your
                                 "good morning love,
                                              sleep well? x"

                            message
song:
if i'm james dean you're audrey hepburn
sleeping with sirens
maybella snow Aug 2013
love isn't
forever
death is -

- sometimes
i want to
die -
Aug 2013 · 256
just maybe
maybella snow Aug 2013
neither yes
nor no        
a hope              
it could be either
or nothing.
maybe,        
maybe
this word
only means
something              
to my
hopeless mind
maybe i'll be okay
maybe i'll finally give in
maybe you love me
enough to comment
a "maybe yes"
...maybe not
in response to Kestrel, Poetic Challenge
Aug 2013 · 507
your fault
maybella snow Aug 2013
you died
i tried to
         i wish i did
dying is easier
than this pain
          of living
maybella snow Aug 2013
crushing my head
between my hands
       to squish my thoughts
of you, i'm trying
to get you out, get out
out
out
out
out
out
out
out
out
out
o u t
o u t
get out
get out
get out
of my head
get the **** out
get out
get out
get out **get out
get out
out out out ou tou tou tout out otu toutou tout tou otu tou get out GET OUT GET OUT
******* GET OUT OF MY FUCING HEAD
****
GET
OUT
I CANT
HANDLE THIS
GET
THE
****
OUT
OF
MY
HEAD
Aug 2013 · 337
i don't want to be here
maybella snow Aug 2013
here: living with you          
here: living at all                  
here: in this body                 
here: in this head                  
here:                                       
alive
Aug 2013 · 471
my apologies:
maybella snow Aug 2013
for being weak and needy
for needing you to hold me
for running because i'm scared
for never saying anything right
for always pestering you
for not trying hard enough
for not being good enough
for not believing your complements
for feeling down most of the time
for being effected by your moods
for letting your moods effect me
for not being impressive enough
for not being old or matured enough
for apologizing so many times
for writing a bad excuses for a poem
for living

forgive me
for living
please
                                       i don't want to live
                                           but i'm not dead
                                                     forgive me
for not dying
when i tried to
maybella snow Aug 2013
20 words


*i sleep; i dream of being held safe by you.
i wake; always alone and craving your warmth and safety.
Aug 2013 · 456
creating destruction
maybella snow Aug 2013
i love standing in the wind                        
letting the velocity of the storm                                
make me feel weak in a different way                                          
weak as in                                                                
not mentally
or physically
just that i know                              
it's bigger than me                              
and yet                
nor the rain
thunder
lightning
wind
make me feel scared                                                  
i like to enjoy the power                                            
it's not mine                                            
but i'm in the presence                                              
of a great power                                                          
that can create destruction
destroy lives                        
ruin everything                  
one day                                                                                              
i just want to                                                                                              
lay in a field                                                                                              
back down in                                                                                              
the grass                                                                                              
with rain pounding                                                                                              
down, lighting                                                                                              
breaking the sky                                                                                              
thunder blasting                                                                                              
wind howling                                                                                              
and simply                                                                          
feel like nothing                                                                  
to the wold,                                                                          
because i'm                                                                          
tiny                                                                                        
compared to it                                                                    
                                                                  
i want to die
in the presence
of a power
bigger than
anyone
can handle

—a storm—
nothing to do with religion in my opinion, i didn't write it about that. but if that's the way you intemperate it, okay
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