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 Apr 2021 max
cal
your words
 Apr 2021 max
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i surround myself with art
i smother myself in it's love
because i have to realize
i am a manifestation of existence
so stuck on the walls
are parts of me
sunlight coming in through the window
i wish i had a stogie
 Apr 2021 max
cal
999
 Apr 2021 max
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999
“Is this how you want your life to go?”
No
That’s why I’ll be gone by 21
 Apr 2021 max
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stay
 Apr 2021 max
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I don’t want peace
I want chaos
I don’t want stability
I want endless uncertainty
I can’t feel anything else
 Apr 2021 max
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getting better
 Apr 2021 max
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i'm in unimaginable pain
but i have never been happier
you once said "i think i am the cause of a lot of your problems"
and you were absolutely right my love
 Apr 2021 max
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process
 Apr 2021 max
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going through the motions
i have accepted you'll be here the rest of my life
so like a wound i just tend to you when you're at your worst
and sit and enjoy a cup of coffee when you're at your quietest
 Apr 2021 max
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beg
 Apr 2021 max
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beg
I deleted all the photos
I blocked you on everything
I moved to an entire new state to get away from you
Yet I noticed
I still sleep in your shirt
 Apr 2021 max
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derived part 2
 Apr 2021 max
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We’re the same
We’re complete opposites
I grew around you
But you aren’t that anymore
And now I am no longer growing around who you use to be
But I have become you
The you that no longer exists
 Apr 2021 max
cal
i hope it resonates
the ways of me
my eyes you'll drown in deep crystal blue as you sink to the bottom
where god hid gold
my laugh deafening and leaving no silence for hate
plump lips where words fly like knives and cut open your heart
the numbers carved into my collarbone numbering your days
in existence
i am alpha
i am the omega
the beginning
and the end
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