If its not erasing,
Its ripping.
If its not ripping,
Its cutting.
Erasing.
Ripping.
Cutting.
Treat my body like a blank canvas of paper,
Waiting to be tampered with.
Because paper is nothing until you make something of it.
Nobody frames a blank sheet of paper,
But they place priceless figures on those who are
Erased.
Ripped.
Cut.
Those who are worthy enough to be
Erased.
Ripped.
Cut.
I just want to be worthy
So i
Erase
Rip
Cut
Myself until somebody finds the beauty in me
The beauty to frame me, and hang me on a wall
To show me off to the world
To place priceless figures on me
Desperate for worth
I erase
Rip
Cut
And take it upon myself
To hang me on a wall with frayed string
Attatched to my heart
And with every spectator who looks at me
I realize that they want nothing to do with me
No matter how much i
Erased
Ripped
Cut
I was an amateur in my technique
And with every
Erasing
Rip cut
I erased my beauty
Ripped my worthiness
Cut my price
So i broke the string
That hung me to the wall
And bleached myself back to my original state
Taped my pieces back together
And ironed out my wrinkles
But the thing about paper
Is no matter how hard you try to make it as beautiful as the original
It will forever show the scars
From the battles it went through

We always said we didn’t know what we would do without each other
But we did know

We’d only known each other for two years

I wasn’t there when your parents split up and each remarried
or when you had to get stitches on your face
or watched your first scary movie

And you weren’t there when I smoked my first cigarette
or tried to **** myself when I was 13
or when I won that soccer game my freshman year

The last time we had *** we were in a rush
because we had school in 37 minutes
and so we made it sloppy and fast in your shower
and then we drove to school together with wet hair and we laughed

The last time we had *** I got pregnant

This wasn’t one of those scares where you’re two weeks late
so you buy a few cheap tests and it’s negative
so you stash the rest in the back of your drawer and forget about it

I got pregnant on the first day of June and I never told you

I miscarried on the last day of August
and you never even knew how close you came to being a father

We stopped talking and I couldn’t even tell you
how I was stunned into silence when I realized I was going to be a mother and then knew I had to keep it a secret

Knew I had to keep our dark haired future to myself

So here it is the end of February

I should have been having the baby this week or next
and you NEVER EVEN KNEW

I watch you say how much you love this little 15 year old girl
you’ve been dating for six months

I miscarried the day you started dating so tell me that was just a

coincidence

But don't you dare ever tell me you don't know what you'd do without me
Well, I guess you wouldn't anymore

Seeing as how you don't want me

I would die for them
To not be consumed
Through mass consumption,
Through a mass genocide.
Every day, millions dead.
Every day alive,
Just as miserable, as hopeless
As the day they are led
To the heavy slaughterhouse doors.
I would die for it to end.
But since I can't, I'll live for them.

They say it is cold out here in the outer reaches
But to me the heat is the equivalent of any beaches'
I came here to escape the echo of your silence
Attempting to be the target of your distant stare
Escaping those is futile when they work as an alliance
It matters not because I'm with the only entity that would ever care
Her rough surface and craters are deep enough to catch all anguish
Forever clinging to feelings because I'm far too selfish
I guess you could say I'm happy out here
Although everything inside me just wishes you were near