out of the corner of my eyes
when you don't notice
seen you be nice to homeless
men give a dollar to a crackhead
I bless
that you
are
blessed
goodness out
angel within
no doubts
I just love
you.

"The snow is gentle and beautiful,"
he said as he lightly brushed my hand,
the wind rushed through the collar of my coat
and my nose was red and numb,
but he was right.
I felt the stillness as we looked out onto the frozen lake,
out of breath simply from the lack of oxygen in the air.
The stillness felt both thick and weightless at the same time,
as if the non-existence of anything imposed so greatly you could reach out and touch it
The silence hung on the bent tree branches, slowing falling in drops,
and immediately evaporating to fill the air
resonating so loudly they hit us in the face,
stunting us with this existence of nothing.
Yet the imposing Nothing was beautiful and gentle, a calm experienced by few,
unwittingly desired by all.

I'm feeling used
And discarded
Like a little confetti popper
You expertly pulled that string
And got that brief explosion
Of bright pretty colors
And then tossed me away
Like you've done with so many other
Little plastic confetti poppers
Maybe I'm special to you
I still let myself hope
I take your explanations
Tuck them away in my head
Little grains of comfort
In a sea of discontent

My pen has failed me
I sit with it and
Sheets of lined paper
Ready to be filled
But the words don't flow right
They're no longer adequate to express
This dull, aching hopelessness
Of knowing that I've lost my heart
Handed it away to someone
Who was much too careless
As words lined the already lined page
Bleeding hearts with barbed wire vines
Etched into the paper
During my wait for words
To pick their way out of my head
I listen to their sound as they tread
Through the minefield of my mind
Getting in traps that distort their meaning
Words like love becoming bleak
Because it got stuck in the trap
The trap that is you

The ethereal screen haunts me
Taunts me with its subtle illumination across a darkened room
It draws words from my fingertips
Just to whisk them away at the accidental brush of movement
The screen, now blank
Unfinished and unsaved
Laughs at me in blinking cursor
Winks at me as I move on
Lost was a masterpiece, or a long and droning soliloquy
Never to be seen
No regrets as the soft light on a gray page still giggles
Lulling me into a sense of numbing safety
Calling my emotions home to the family who never lets me down
Safe in their eyes
As they too are drawn to the subtle light
Across the darkened room