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I remember 12 year old me
13 year old me
14 year old me
15 year old me
16 year old me
17 year old me
crying alone at night
a blade in hand
carving into my body
blood staining my clothes
never thinking it could get better
but it got better
the blade is retired
the scars are healed
never to be reopened
I'm 164 days clean from sh!!
 Jun 11 Lyle
Olivia Williams
BURDEN
A Poem by Olivia Williams
Metal chains,
Weighing down
Blood-covered wrists.
No one has noticed or found.
Rocks on my shoulders,
Heavy and cracked,
Past repair.
Stuck in a storm of despair,
Repeated thoughts
That swarms my mind.
Tangled up in guilt,
No denying
That flicker I need
Always fades.
The people that love me
Always end up in my web of betrayals.
I scream in silence,
Either no one hears
Or no one cares.
A battle started,
With no way to win.
Fighting and fighting,
But this burden traps me within.
I feel their looks,
Always concerned.
I can't explain,
As I always blame myself, thinking,
“It’s my fault, I could have stopped it.”
I know this is what I’ve earned.
I try to speak,
And to explain,
But my burden
Drags everything—
Including my family and friends—
Farther and farther
Away.
This storm strips me of my life,
Of what I hope.
I drag them down
When I crash my boat.
One day I'll break.
They'll notice,
And fear
That I'll fall and break,
And I'll be too far beyond repair.
I push everyone close
With my smile,
Even though it's fake,
But then I push them back out.
I'm just afraid for them to see
How torn I truly am.
I want to heal,
I want to let go.
I'll always be the weight,
And the burden
That holds everyone
Apart.
Because when I share what I feel,
I tear others apart.
I burden everyone I see,
And I feel so bad.
Now I’m stuck in this loop—
Of pain, betrayal, getting help, and giving up—
With no way out.
This is my burden, always here.
I need people to listen—
PLEASE LISTEN!
PLEASE HEAR!!!
 Jun 11 Lyle
Olivia Williams
When I was young
I went to school
The library was like home
I’d sit in the chairs
Staring at them all
with curiosity in my eyes
“I would like to read this book!”
I’d call
She’d grab it for me
And check it out
The librarians
Already knew me by heart
She’d say
“Those books are very advanced!”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes I'm sure!” I’d reply
Going to sit down
I’d get very cosy
And start reading aloud
The librarian was surprised
By the level I could read
I wasn’t though
The books were very fascinating to me
In elementary school I read middle school books
I was always one grade ahead
No matter what the library’s been my happy place
Books to me
They come to life
They jump out the pages
And speak to me
This library was my first adventure
And always will be
Where my future was unlocked
I’m an author know
With many books and poems
All thanks to the library
Which I called home
The real question may not be,
"Who's good and who's bad?"
It may be,

Who's trying to save the world,
Who's mislead?

So when we look upon the mess that we live in,
Consider it,
Who's trying to save this world,
Who's manipulated by it?
 Jun 11 Lyle
lizie
spin
 Jun 11 Lyle
lizie
i’m trying not to think too hard.
because it hurts.
because it always does.
but you can’t stop an overthinker
from thinking,
just like you can’t stop a heart
from wanting.

my head aches
with the weight of everything
i can’t fix.
my nose won’t stop running,
my cough shakes something loose
in my chest,
but not the part
that misses you.

and i do.
miss you in a way that
makes the room spin,
makes me wish i was
dumb and lighthearted
and easy.
but i’m not.

i think too hard.
feel too much.
want too deeply.
and right now,
i want you
more than i know
how to handle.
I don't feel like writing poems
I don't feel like making a song
I don't want to write a story
It takes too ******* long

I don't want to feel this empty
But I'm tired of being sad
I don't know if its just envy
But I hate that you're not mad

I dont like the way you laughed it off
The way you said I was fine
I hate that you disgust yourself
I hate that your not mine

I hope that you're not happy now
I hope that you are messed up
I hope she leaves you hon
I'll pour you another cup
 Jun 11 Lyle
Liana
I am shivering
I am not cold

I am in the bathroom
I don't need it

I can't breathe
It isn't my asthma

I am exhausted
I can not sleep

I am lonely
But I won't text anyone

I am crying
I don't know why

I fear I will die
Nothing real is killing me

My stomach is grumbling
I won't eat

Right now
Life kind of *****
If you feel this way now, sending love ❤️
 Jun 11 Lyle
Liana
Spilt Milk
 Jun 11 Lyle
Liana
You know when you spill water and get upset only to hear someone say, “it's just water!”
It doesn't matter, water, pineapple juice, or milk I'm still soaked and need to change
The fact that what I spilled happened to be water doesnt make me less clumsy
It doesn't make my fingers less sweaty
It doesn't make it okay
“It's just water” they say
I’d be just as clumsy holding milk in my hand
What would you say if I spilt milk?
But if I spilt water, it's okay
If shes my daughter, it's okay


This isn't about spilt milk
"It's okay, he's your dad!", "But he's still your dad!"

The fact that it's his daughter doesn't make it okay
IT IS NOT OKAY PEOPLE
❤️
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