I have no pitty, like I have no pain
The scars I created still remain
On my wrist the stair through my eyes
Almost like they were related to the knife,
It made them, but I don't see,
While cutting my self
Fill the hatred inside me ,
It cause tears and so much pain
Fill the hated But in the end the scars remain, people ask people question among the scars but the answers are just filled with excuses
Almost like the come out of my mouth with no though add at the end
But the people look at and think why I would want somthing that caused so much attention to remain why I still do it I have no clue , but it fixes my heart almost like glue, yea the scars their vivid  to the eye but to me it was better than saying goodbye

When will you relize the beat of my heart silently in your hand
You hold it you own it
You can try to break try to hurt it but at this time of life I'm fully alive


I'm fully alive to sit here with you to hold your hand

I'm fully alive to show you the right way to push toward the road to success


When will you relize I don't criticize you I hurt you only to show I'm fully alive for you

Mom comes in her room to see her teen age daughter laying on the floor
She checks for a pulse
She checks the eyes
But it seems her daughter has lost her life, with a note lying beside her that read, mommy it's okay I was born just to be dead, this was her calling, this was her set free from all the hater,
This was her appointment to get her wings on and fly
The last part of the note read "mommy my wings fit fine there very pretty only if you could see them to only if you could feel them mommy I miss you and I love don't cry or blame this on your self it wasn't your fault I took the heart beet out of my self  but I love you".
Now that mommy has no daughter what eles is left other the to try out the blade her self.

Me and Mom
We don't get on
She says right
I say move along

We have different values
Opposing mindsets
With conflicts
But she will always be my safety net

My mom she's protective
And I'm like a hyper bird
Running before I walk
Talking without thinking first

I chase dead ends
Flying down the highway
Trusting the traffic of people
Who've tried and tested

But my mom she knows
Has a special radar
Which glows
An intuition that later shows

That's not for you my child
Your heart won't find ease
Yet still I plead
Mom please

So she keeps firm her hold
At times tugs back
A sharp whiplash
To keep me on track

I remember when she said
I don't quite like
That friend of yours
Mark my words

Not long after
A lesson was to be learnt
That friend ashamed
And let me take the blame

Moms have wisdom
Of paths they didn't choose
A time they never knew
Always thinking the best for you

I can still remember little things about you:

The way your eyes crinkled at the corners when you smiled
and when you laughed I was such a happy child.
I can still feel your warmth from when I was so young
lying happily on your lap, with eyes lit up and a head that never hung.

The night goes on without you still,
but I miss you more than anyone ever will.
You were Mother, you were life.

The sadness heavily lingers over me,
as I remember the last time I ever touched your face:
Cold and hard and fallen from a mother's blessed grace.

Always you're in my heart,
never will we be apart.
Seven years but you're still beautiful to me.

Mom hides her tears
Cries in her heart
Smiles through her eyes
Says words of love with her lips
That never lies...

As she hugged
me even tighter,
I felt a tear stream
down my face.


a.s.