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Jul 2015 · 1.9k
Untitled SS
Lucy Tonic Jul 2015
"Because cowboys and snakes are my kin"*

Because I feel volcanoes in my skin
Because I've sinned
Because I want to get in
Because I've already grown...

Nature replicates in sets of eight
Deviating ends of the weak and the great
Chemical stew makes memory fail
Chemical brew makes brain inhale
Do the push, take the plunge
Absorb the agony like a sponge
Can't map the contradictions
(Is there truth in fiction?)
Give up the blood and give up the ghost
Reaching out to them that hate you most
Couldn't even reach level two
Divy up the army between red and blue

Pieces slowly fitting
But puzzle never solved
Reaching out to nothing
Only one resolve
Listened to a hero's song
'Bout a thousand times
But wisdom never sank in
Too much focus on the rhyme
(Prayed for the night, for the very first time
But night never came
And the rain falls on everyone but me
Cause nature's got a few tricks up her sleeve)

Imperfect circles, always imperfect circles
(Autumn angel gets their wings)
Jul 2015 · 1.2k
Paper Cuts
Lucy Tonic Jul 2015
off of the benches and into the trenches
you can't delete it, only repeat it
Jul 2015 · 1.2k
Wasted
Lucy Tonic Jul 2015
She's in between a rock and a hard place
Faces don't smile at her anymore
Old friends lock their doors
And neighbors shut their drapes
And that's all it takes to be in hell
She transformed from a lamb into a black sheep
People don't smile anymore
Digging deep at the core
Of a rotten apple seed
And that's all she needs to never tell
What's on her mind, what's in her eyes
Blinded and traumatized
But she has tough skin
When she's smoking the liquids and
The consonants beat her down
Like the promises of the sounds
That soothe her, then leave her hanging around
By herself
Cause if you can't share love than love is wasted
Put on the shelf
By a man who swore he loved her taste
So she takes the bottle and starts to pour
Cause nobody smiles anymore
She's in between the demons and the sea
She wants to bring out her inner number three
But if you can't share love than love is wasted
Jun 2015 · 1.2k
Havoc
Lucy Tonic Jun 2015
You dangled the carrot in front of me
Said you wanted to multiply
I knew of all your schemes and pipe dreams
But I happily obliged
Now you're gone
And I'm left with a bad taste in my mouth
Cause the milk has long expired
So much for all those times I went south
Not trying to be bitter
You had to move on to greener pastures
But you know as well as I
You couldn't get away faster
Can you blame someone
For giving up on a freak
Can you blame someone
For wreaking havoc on your heart
We're so far apart now
You're keeping up your disguise
And the only time I ever saw depth in your eyes
Is when you never said goodbye
Jun 2015 · 1.1k
Blank Canvas
Lucy Tonic Jun 2015
Our hungry souls desired long before the umbilical remnant dissolved
From the beginning, we desired death
We flirted with it, took it to dinner
Because there's a difference between white walls and a empty sheet of paper
You can decorate with pictures, scribble down words
But the first mistake, the first fake heart, the first ride, the first scar
Will never disappear
It lasts forever
You may disagree, but I know better
None of us were born with a blank canvas
The memories were simply erased
So we wouldn't go crazy
But some of us did anyway
Jun 2015 · 920
Locke & Loaded
Lucy Tonic Jun 2015
"Two unconnected, discontinuous segments of consciousness are not part of the same person, but belong instead to two different persons."*

Lived many wretched lives
But this one takes the cake
Life is but a trial
Remembered most for your mistakes
Out of your reality and out of my awareness
I was dragged by my naked collar
The mystic became violated
As the deity asked for a dollar
Apocalyptic visions come
When I dream by day
Cognizant of many things
But the mystery lies in wait
Their interpretation is prevailing
But they are blind to its function of power
They think the concepts of light and truth
Can be found in a beautiful flower
The sinners wait with bated breath
Measuring my faults on a scale
But the second coming's coming soon
Only He can judge me where I failed
Have enough chaos in me
To produce a thousand dancing stars
You have your way and I have mine
The right way only exists on Mars
Security of conformity you choose
But I was not meant to have that choice
I am just a highly flawed individual
Searching for freedom and a voice
Constantly seeking a fortress, a lighthouse
But I know this must be in solitude
Exile is where I belong
The path home always eludes
Jun 2015 · 978
Antediluvian Baby
Lucy Tonic Jun 2015
Ancient as the wind
Monroe hips
And a smile that could stretch for miles...
Classically outdated
But the flower never faded
Honey is just searching for redemption
On the wings of Magdalene...
One day your empire will rise from the sea
The ashes will fly with the breeze
And the rain will be as pure as the first tear that fell from His eye...
Jun 2015 · 1.1k
11 Seasons
Lucy Tonic Jun 2015
Typically the savior gets attached
To the one who's falling that they catch
But this is a clear role reversal
Guess I missed too many play rehearsals
I suppose I was your Persephone
Hibernating winters on my knees
Soon your Zeus-like ego began to show
With all the focus on your lightning bolt
I was there through all eleven seasons
Throwing away caution, rhyme and reason
Now you say our future is yours only
Dividing a union that was holy
But I refuse to coil 'round your finger
Under thumb or stone I will not linger
Though I'm in between Satan and the sea
You will find you have no power o'er me
Jun 2015 · 609
Untitled Again
Lucy Tonic Jun 2015
Dealt myself a hand I can't take back
Married to the moon with it's icy black
Now it's time to teach myself a lesson
I've gotta learn to fall out of love with you
The world is made of paper now
I'm on the stage taking a half-bow
Ceaselessly pushing the envelope
When I should be making origami
The sun is out, the earth is blooming
I'm an anti-consumer who can't stop consuming
And the boys all wanna plant their seed
But this time I won't water it
Jun 2015 · 843
Botched Sacrament
Lucy Tonic Jun 2015
Bowl full of oil
We should have been royal
Priest drunk off his own wine
Wiped our foreheads of the divine
Some of us got a taste
For others, what a waste
They became the ****** and cursed
Now the last will never be first
Dear Universe, what did you expect
Not just a moment under rug swept
But an event bound to produce a devil or three
And now, one of those devils is me
Jun 2015 · 656
Aliens Are Smokers Too
Lucy Tonic Jun 2015
It goes in, it goes out
The cause and the cure
The faith and the doubt
It goes out, it goes in
Cyclical nature
Miracle and sin

Checked into hotel Cali
They say it all comes down to balance
But I know they're casting spells so
Next time I'll have no allowance

But I've seen the magic, in the unfolding
Unyielding power of something divine
Nobody's perfect, I'm the furthest thing from it
I've been this way for all of my lives

Will I reach the next number
Will I graduate
Should I give in
Or wave goodbye to fate

It's closing in now
They're closing in now
Is this the whole story
This can't be my story...
Jun 2015 · 721
Vent
Lucy Tonic Jun 2015
I'm a used up *****
Who's running out of band-aids
Name any emotion under the sun
But I've bet you've never been burned like me
So you do your strut always two steps ahead
Thinking I don't smell the poison sitting on your tongue
Like I'm ******* oblivious to bitterness
Welcome to the world of the sold and bought
So if you got something to say
Unleash that beast, be brave
Cause I bet a million bucks
That your heart's a *****
That's been waiting to show its true colors all along
Hey honey, you should thank me for the place you get to put your rage
And Job's Coffin looks down on the both of us
But go believing everything you haven't witnessed firsthand
And put a price tag on your dreams
Jun 2015 · 699
Three Wise Fools
Lucy Tonic Jun 2015
I can tell you're ripe
Killing me with kind
So don't mind if I just unwind
While you **** a smile-
But baby, I'm not disarmed
You make quite the cocktail
And I paint quite the picture
You don't quiet down in spite of me
And I don't pretend that it doesn't hurt to breathe
This is the way things must be
My own demented version of healthy
Your one-dimensional reality
And the silence makes three
So go ahead, do what you need to
Look up, forth, back, down but never through
I'll just slouch and smoke till I get the joke
And count the times you never blinked
Closer to my skin you were
Till things took another turn
Now I'm prying my eyes
And crying your thoughts
From heart to spine
Fingertip to elbow
Gives a whole new meaning to
You had me at hello
Jun 2015 · 689
Untitled One
Lucy Tonic Jun 2015
Tree split right down the middle
Between grey-black storm clouds
And a yellow lush meadow
Blame it on the lightning
But you should know better
Blame it on the fact that
The roots needed to get wetter
But we all know the division
Was caused by the incision
Of curiosity in paradise
And a clock with a nasty vice

*I set the two earth candles on the mantle without a care
Then placed Saturn in between with a Japanese flair
Unintentional, but I was setting myself a trap
We're all puppets basking in the orange-glow aftermath
Jun 2015 · 676
Another Bitter Leaving
Lucy Tonic Jun 2015
He comes on like a messiah
But true colors show he's just another warhol
Hanging second-place decorations for all his candy's & edie's
Meanwhile I'm overdosing on his love in the bathroom stall*

Now I'm forced to sit and watch you leave
As I desperately point out
That the trees aren't bare yet
And it feels like I'm drowning in a helmet made of weeds
And I know you never wanted to take on my disease
These tears are fierce but these eyes are weak
And I'm left to paint the years with a crooked branch
And a palette of whatever shade I chose to bleed
All because you won't let me follow your lead
I'm screaming at the top of my lungs, but you refuse to hear the noise
I guess this is the moment when men become little boys
Jun 2015 · 572
Porch
Lucy Tonic Jun 2015
I'm sitting on the porch, watching you analyze me
Guess I was crazy to think any of this was behind me
And I don't know what's worse-
A chaperone in wolf's clothing
Or being led to the slaughter
By your one and only...vice
It must be nice to have an army
All I got is a dissonant symphony
That we used to play, back in the day
Before these times of euphoric disarray
So you can perform for whichever side you're on
Cause I'm used to being alone
And I just don't care anymore...
Jun 2015 · 775
Cecil
Lucy Tonic Jun 2015
walked upon your avenue 'bout a thousand times before
ironically, wasn't looking for a score
only had a pen as my sword
it's a shame
but good to know, some things remain the same
don't know what sounds were ringing in my ears then
but the beers and the tears made me a brave ten
guess I didn't feel enslaved then
guess I knew when turn the page when
someone enters your life's story
and you think you're better, cause everything seems boring
when you got neil or tori spitting wisdom in your lobes
and the poor **** is jammin' to that gangster **** that runs the globe
illuminati, glitterati, they don't want your body
it's just an echo of nevermore
used to know a girl named Lenore
until the birds poured into her head
stolen first were the memories and things unsaid
next came the dreams from a solitary bed
might as well have been in the middle of the ocean
I don't pretend to know your pain
or what it's like to lose or gain
I only know that I can conceive the notion
of waves crashing, so soothing, so earth-shattering
the infernal pressure felt from above while you're barely floating
and God seems to be gloating, like he created something in his image
so hold on, no matter how sinister
and of course, they all tell you it's in your mind
it's the devil doing paint by numbers in disguise
it's a gift-wrapped present with nothing inside but lead
but you know that crazy is just a term for the clock in your head
so you listen to his rhymes that flow, so lightly but so heavily
that they become your desire
so you use your last match to blow your best smoke ring
and never notice that the bed's on fire
and now you're back walking on the avenue
it took quite a few spins of that **** for you to get the gist
cause even the sages wouldn't know what side to be on
when it's you against the world, outsider vs insider, and on and on
it goes, so you rub elbows with a stranger
next move could be heaven or be danger
but this is your least favorite life
so you say **** it, hello, my name is, welcome to the show
Jun 2015 · 451
The Missing Sinners
Lucy Tonic Jun 2015
My eyes walk the tightrope
In the shadows of a dancing flame
This feeling is fresh and fleeting
I know nothing will ever be the same
It's the pure and ***** black clean
It's climbing up a dying starbeam
It's the difference between a wish and a dream

(Back against the wall
Awaiting the crucifixion
Feeling the thunder and tasting the bolts
Listening to Band of Horses' diction)
Jun 2015 · 679
Mirage
Lucy Tonic Jun 2015
There's a mirror on the dashboard
But I can't see myself
Driving blindly through a fog
Created by the sun's wealth

I know I should have known better
When the traffic light changed
To match the color of the drum
Beating inside my cage

Anything is possible
Or am I just displaced
A refraction of air and heat
And the loss of genuine grace

Free me from these illusions
The chimera and the apparition
But let me keep imagining
Don't take away the inverted visions

There's a mirror in the desert
My thirsty soul marches through windy sands
I hope to find relief in water
But it's just a cactus with a pocket watch
Jun 2015 · 631
Revolving
Lucy Tonic Jun 2015
This may serve no purpose
I don't wanna make you nervous
I just wanna make you think
Summer will be over before you blink

You see, I am just a pile of ashes, trying to rise from the floor
And you are just a magician playing with your trap doors
Revolving as I'm dissolving as you're evolving

Well I went searching for big bad love
When a demon landed on my doorstep with a thud
It told me not to worry 'bout the cosmic hierarchy
My lotus flower angel's still stuck in the mud
And Philomena wasn't around to catch me when I fell down
So I dove into the fires of the moon's cold underground

All the colors and the echoes of my dreams resided there
All my superwomen and all my nightmares
You casually say, let's go downtown
But I'm not a free agent, I am bound
By a force you could never understand
So please don't take my photograph, just take my hand

But I don't wanna make you nervous
And I probably don't deserve this
I am just trying to make you think
Before this pen runs out of ink
Lucy Tonic Jun 2015
I'm blowing on a dandelion
And you're the tornado that blows me away
But amidst all the cows and car parts
Remember I'll always see your face
I'm the goldfish swimming in the pond
And you're the bird that plucks me out
I guess I should thank you for
A quick death and a trip to your mouth
Cause you're lack of hope maintains a shadow
So even when you're close I'll be weary
I guess now you see just how twisted I can be
As your right hand's on red, and my left foot's on green
I am in the mouse in the maze
Constantly looking for the prize
All your friends are amazed
That you're such a patient snake
But why don't you crawl out of the weeds
I'd like to show you something neat-
The ins and outsides of me
****, you've seen it already
I know I'm the fire that burnt the forest down
But your the hose in the sky that put it out
Didn't know I was capable of such demolition
I guess this puts you in an awkward position
So please, I beg you, please
If we ever meant anything
Than please don't pretend
That your eye isn't on the lens
Oh please, I beg you, please
I've always been your entrance to summer
So if you must exit
Just leave me be in this cape cod
And forget all the memories
We never had
We never had
Jun 2015 · 564
Acquired Taste
Lucy Tonic Jun 2015
You shot me out like confetti from the canon
But you never intended to clean up the mess
Already shed my dress
And the scientist will never find the holy grail
The words impaled as I lit another flame
Hid my tail between my legs
And slept in fetal position
I beg for inquisition, instead I got a lousy photograph
A freakish silhouette defines now who I am
Amid all the loud, happy sounds, all I hear are church bells
A death knell and a dirge that fell on its sword
You took my moon away, but you never tasted its core
So plant some seeds of memory
Cause my daydreams haunt me
And the taper has almost reached the floor
Jun 2015 · 880
Jellyfish
Lucy Tonic Jun 2015
I bet you could sense my frustration at your hesitation
It wasn't like before...
You treat me like a pig who can't see the sky
But really I'm just a zebra with crooked stripes
You used to be like me- afraid to sleep alone
Now you're just setting traps to win the rhino's horn
Or are you the leech, with thirty-two brains
Who isn't ashamed to **** my blood for your gain
Or have you become like the common jellyfish,
Whose sting hurts like hell and who's a little heartless
Jun 2015 · 574
Crushed
Lucy Tonic Jun 2015
Never lollipops or blood
Just sounds reverberating
But I no longer can
Trust you in silence
Oh, no no no
It's happened
Your brain caught up to them
And you let go of my hand
I bit into the candy and it tasted metallic
I bet you find that ironic
But I really thought you'd understand
But with all your degrees and social needs
That wasn't part of our plan
So I'll let go of this
Until we meet again
If we meet...
If we meet...
In a sea of broken glass
Don't pretend
To wash the cuts on my feet
Jun 2015 · 1.1k
Fruit Loops
Lucy Tonic Jun 2015
Saturn wrote me a letter
But it ended up in your mailbox
I thought all your doors were open
Now you're just another lock I can't pick

The definition of hustler has changed
The original was more gangster than any
Of these rappers could ever imagine

(There's fruit loops falling all around me
But all I remember is grandma's house
Familiar but somehow tainted)
Jun 2015 · 574
Continent
Lucy Tonic Jun 2015
I need a spiritual insurance policy
While they all seek common currency
The fruit of divine questions
Can't be found in the light of pale society

Every three days I resurrect
Penetrating the mystery
But I die in every moment
Cause I can't change history

He said you must deny yourself
In order to come to Him
You must not traffic in souls
But give freely to those who sin

Struggling with Eros
And its hedonistic ways
Consumed by the monster
In the self-love battle haze

Human weakness is a fact
But we all have different plights
You may think you're an island
But you're a continent in Christ
Not sure if I published this already....
Jun 2015 · 524
Matter of Time
Lucy Tonic Jun 2015
Just do it
The world will be a better place
To be strong is to be weak
Tomorrow is just a phase
They hate your guts
And they hate your outsides
So easy to attack
When the cause seems justified
Oh, no
The outsider stands
With his heart and his eyes in his hand
They talk in code
They call you a boy
When bodies change
Souls become unemployed
Well, speak that word again
And I might just fall off the face of the earth again
You're positively 4th street
And when the doors meet, I see
Charlie Manson eating strawberry ice cream
And when will the colors bleed
Oh, yeah
The outsider stands
With his heart and his eyes in his hand
Bad vibrations coming from
Every corner of a compass
Didn't know life was a contest
Don't want to be an object
Don't want to compete on the world stage
But as always, all I've got is this page
And a dead dream- there's a hole in the clouds-
I see it floating
Jun 2015 · 568
Jack & Jill & Other Tales
Lucy Tonic Jun 2015
I know I did you wrong
Can't explain it in a song
I asked God to strike me dead
Shooting stars had other plans
What else can I say
Maybe earth is just not in my DNA

And maybe I come from a place
Filled with myths of decay
And all the biblical horrors
Don't come close to my sorrow
How else can I grow
If I'm not in the audio afterglow

It's like aqua seafoam shame
Cause there's no on else to blame
Except mine lacks a color
I'm in the boat without a rudder
What else can I do
Except count the constellations two by two

I'm running with lungs full of smoke
Because I am the local joke
I'm running out of air to breathe
Tenderness is what I need
But what else can I feel
When the rain is just evaporated tears

I'm searching for the moment in space
Where my head and my heart match my face
Roll with the punches, leave a scar
Cause I'm tied to dying fish and angry Mars
To whom should I hail
When the fourth dimension lifts its veil

(Jack & Jill fetched the pail
And the universe inhaled)
Jun 2015 · 567
Window Pain
Lucy Tonic Jun 2015
Stuck in the jaws of life
And she's got bedroom eyes
The candle's burning cinnamon
But I don't know where she's been
And I sense something eternal about her gaze
But I feel something infernal about her ways
Cause I made a silly bet with Saturn
And now I've lost track of the patterns
That gave my life meaning
And gave nature's face a gleaning grace
I've already been in the garden, the place
Where all veils consist of a thin piece of lace
But to me, she looks like the May Queen
Wearing a mask to disguise her motives unseen
But my heart is stronger than my reign
She will always be my window pain
That I lean on whenever I feel the shame
That comes from the souls that fall
In every drop of rain
Jun 2015 · 542
In This Crowded Place
Lucy Tonic Jun 2015
In a packed room
Full of hipsters and vampires
You know they're one and the same
So we coat our balloons with the poison
So they can't **** the source from our wet veins
And I know we might not understand each other
But in this crowded place, I'm ok
As long as I'm next to you
It doesn't matter if the night ends red or blue
Cause we both know it's just the peel of the orange
And we both know there might not be a tomorrow
So you can go on your quest
And I'll make my final request
For both of us to possess
Another friendly caress from a stranger
Nevermind the danger, the whole world's a mess
But in this crowded place, I'm ok
As long as I'm next to you
It doesn't matter if the night ends with sand or glue
Cause we both know it's just the peel of time
Our heads hold the reason, our hearts hold the rhyme
Lucy Tonic Jun 2015
The Earth is an ornament on the universal tree
Every time I see my reflection, it shatters into pieces
A long time ago, I placed the moon in my heart
Still never expected to taste so much salt
It's all blood and water in the end
From this view, the ocean looks red
But as the world falls around me
I am astounded, I am at peace
Morning dew, take me back to you
I can't conclude with another thought of you
So I'll focus on the jaded and tainted
Is a devil with no appetite a saint?
I hear fireworks ahead with some amazing graces
And I remember the days when I used to paint my face
In the mirror...Unforgiving mirror
On a starry night, would you cut your ear off
Just to create?
May 2015 · 484
Sour Season
Lucy Tonic May 2015
He put his foot down
But I wasn't turned on
I looked him in the eye, both feet on the ground
But he stood strong
Not trying to toss him over
Like the wind
I guess I'm trying to win him over
With swimming lessons
And Hollywood wouldn't take him
But it did in its own way
Now he's off running with the bulls
But I was never the matador anyway
Still, doesn't he know
That I reach for the bottle
Cause it shows too much
And he's leaving full throttle
I guess I lied before
Never could plant my feet down
He watered me until I grew
Now he's leaving town
Jesus, erase this strange gravity
That makes me foam from the mouth
And howl like a dog
In the fog of his shadow
Doesn't he know,
I get ****** up
Because I am
****** up
But what color is showing, now
Cause orange is all I see
As I'm on my knees
But Saturn won't stop the bleedin'
It's the cause and the cure
But I'm a sore Buddha
And he thinks she's cuter
So put me out of my misery
Cause with you I felt free
And when it comes down to it
All the drugs and the ***
Didn't make me feel a thing
That was real
What's the deal
With this unspoken fear
I can't even cry
But I wanna scream all night
But I know you'll push me away
Like the other day
So please, let me be your last DJ
I'll put on a song
That'll make you hum along
And maybe you'll remember me that way
Not as the sprout that never
Became the bean
Not as the lout
Who never grew wings
Not as the south as it looks
From a vampire book
Not as the house
That fell on her stockings
It's not the sound of you walking away
It's the sound of you knocking
In my mind, all of the time
Can't stop the cling and clatter
As the rain pitter-patters on my
Window pane
You were my superman
But I was never your....
I guess I'm asking for rescue
You hold the cards
But never read my cues
And if this were a movie
We'd be hitched already
But I won't think her a *****
If with her you go steady
Just promise me
You won't creep back in my life
After I've set fire
To all of the memories
But don't you worry
I'll build a fortress around
All the love and the sounds
That pulled you close to me
Everything happens for a reason
What a sour season
But just in time for the moon to devour
Both of us in our final hours
So take me serious next time
Say goodnight, not goodbye
May 2015 · 529
Yet
Lucy Tonic May 2015
Yet
It's over my head but not out of my mind
Cause I know the real clock doesn't tell time
And you Judas'd me with a Jesus smile
It's never out of my head but always over my mind
Will you ever bring me up to speed?
Cause it's something I desperately need
And maybe I could understand your creed
The blood's different, but we all bleed
The same
And I know I'm to blame
I know
I know, I know nothing but the flame
So every time I light a match
I take a wild guess
You were supposed to be my guest
But you hosted a virus with your head on my chest
And I don't know the rest
I know
I know, I know, I know nothing
Yet.
May 2015 · 4.3k
Oh Pisces
Lucy Tonic May 2015
There was smoke and there was fire
I awoke with colors of your desire
We made a tent, we made a pact, then you left
Oh Pisces, you were my favorite mess
I know I became your disaster
Was I on your mind when you drove that car faster?
You were the plane, and I was the hawk
In a collision of the strange, so you decided to walk away
Oh Pisces, don't you know
We are just two fish swimming in the bowl
The alphabet says it all
Take a look, then give me a call
Lucy Tonic May 2015
Careful where you spread your wings
You might land where the mockingbirds sing
Under the rule of one mad king
In a grid with roots so deep, it makes Mother Nature weep
Guess you'll just have to keep flyin'
****** if you do or don't so just keep tryin'
And if you find nothing down here worthwhile
Soar up in the atmosphere, universal child

Cause no one's ever done with being wild
It's something innate like desire
So be careful but don't forget to smile
So it'll hurt a little less when the wolves come for your time of dyin'
May 2015 · 402
27 Words
Lucy Tonic May 2015
Rather be deluded than diluted. Like your personality that wilts in the presence of radiance. I hug the shadow while you embrace the darkness. See the difference?
May 2015 · 460
Speed Dreams
Lucy Tonic May 2015
I'm coming down
But I'm still racing
Burnt out
Too many cigarettes

And my dreams are usually at full speed
In the arms of REM sleep
So tell me why, as my body was flyin'
I was in the wicked garden all night

I had a knife in my pocket in the closet
I had my clothes on in the bathtub
Sister tells me I need to run
But I missed the starting gun
And all old friends were in on it
A conspiracy, but I'm the theorist
And I remember the 7-11
And all the fish dying as they went to heaven
Sister tell me what I have to do
She says a train is coming through
Next thing I know, I'm at the bus stop
With nothing but a knife in my pocket

My subconscious feels really low
As these speed dreams move so slow
Burnt out, as I light another smoke
Why does it always come down to That motto
May 2015 · 1.0k
Dream #101
Lucy Tonic May 2015
Broken shards of coffee glass, french vanilla
Chinese food and a long walk home
Wasn't ready to get on the bus
Got a job than lost it
To a roommate who seduced my one true love until he left
Then he showed up-
A face from the past who loved hockey
And he didn't make me sing about my leather-
He just wanted me to laugh and dance
And reminded me of its vitality
Back to vanilla coffee glass and Chinese
Still not ready to get on the bus
(It's gonna be a long walk home)
May 2015 · 509
All My Heroes Are Dead
Lucy Tonic May 2015
Are you ready to come in
Learn to swim
Or are you in on it
I feel Pele
Inside of me
Raging like the waves
Penny for my thoughts
At what cost
Piggy bank overflowing
Not enough time
Not enough rhyme
Too much furniture
So I strike the flame
Take back the name
Peel the layers with a pen
Cause it's cheap to be sane
When you're in the game
Where's the envoy in this cosmic bend
May 2015 · 362
Dedicated
Lucy Tonic May 2015
You say I don't live in the real world
Well, I'm glad I don't
It would eat me alive
It's already eaten me alive
You say I reach too much for band-aids
Well, I'm glad that I do
They encourage me to shut down, reach out-
Even if it's for the advil in the morning
You sit on the edge of my bed and point out my flaws
Well, I'm glad you did
Cause it made me feel like ****
But I realized you're no ally
You only want me around to please you; then you leave me behind
Well, I'm glad I know now
That I can always count on you for something
And fool me twice, shame on me
You say I'm garbage cause I live on cheap rent
Well, it's good to know gossip runs in the family
Cause I forgot life is like high school with bigger stakes
Like the one you stick in my heart every time you talk about money
You say you can't make it to the show
Well, I sense your tone
It seems like you'd lend me your coat
When you rather me shiver to the bone
You say you know nothing
Well, I sense you know everything
Now that I spelled it out in ink
Cause it's clear the blood was lacking
May 2015 · 422
LE
Lucy Tonic May 2015
LE
Don't have the capacity to hate
Still the taste of bated breath smells metallic
So many ideas in so little time
They delete my files as I dissect importance
Now the melodies have been corrupted
Except for the blue star lullaby
And right now that's the only thing that makes sense...
But why make sense? Why reason? Why pry?
You've only proven just how green your sky is-
Ironic, right?
And no matter what happens I'll never be chained to you
Your bane is that you're not my ghost; not even my vapour
Cause you turned off the music of my memory
And your eyes were never as big as his
Try if you must, but you can't pierce a soul-
You may bruise it, use it, roll around in it for awhile
But it always heals itself
So press down with all your weight
I might break- but I've watched IT bend
May 2015 · 466
Spit
Lucy Tonic May 2015
Spit the food into my mouth so I can swallow
Leave a billow of smoke rings for my pillow
Let me hibernate under the unforgiving sun
Let me be a simple person in my next incarnation

As we light our cigarettes, let's make a pact
To be the duet that no one can forget
You can promise me fairy-tales, butterflies and moonbeams
I can promise you to be no one else but me

Eat the mosquito's eggs so I can swim in the pond
Leave me alone when I have headphones on
Let me pollinate my mind whenever I want
Let me be a secret, open book- like the chosen one

As we toast to the big empty sky
To be a surprise of only the good kind
You can promise to love me even when I'm a train-wreck
I can write you songs that give a pleasant tingling to your neck
May 2015 · 395
Feathers on the Water
Lucy Tonic May 2015
Feathers on the water
Flown from the bed
There death rested
A pillow for its head
May 2015 · 478
Later, Creator (Part Two)
Lucy Tonic May 2015
People want to walk on crystal clouds
I give them gravity
People want to cross the gate
Moses parted the Red Sea
People want to live forever
I bring them death and disease
People want to be invisible
I give them eyes to see

People want to be united
I part them with the oceans
People want an elixir
But Jesus had no potions
People want to find meaning
I bring them no notions
People want to create
I give them emotions

People want logic
I bring them the absurd
People want music
Angels bring them songs unheard
People want to know the universe
I just give them planet earth
People want to be free
They just have to say the word
May 2015 · 664
Mercy
Lucy Tonic May 2015
Sinking deep or full-sail ahead
These are the contents of my head
But for every time I saw the ocean, not the sea
Lord, have mercy on me

Flaming numbness or burnt-out desire
My body's always on fire
But for every time I fell victim to gluttony
Lord, have mercy on me

A sunshower in the day and a candle in the dark
This is the mystery of my heart
But for every time, I traded still rainbows for the wind's speed
Lord, have mercy on me

A devil prefers wet lips; God prefers silence
Didn't realize that such small words could cause such big violence
But for every time, I don't think before I speak
Lord, have mercy on me

They laugh and frown anytime I sing and dance
This is just my circumstance
But for every time they use the sword and not the pen
Lord, have mercy on them
May 2015 · 1.1k
Idiosyncrasies of Paradise
Lucy Tonic May 2015
Nights under stars
Sand between toes
Drive-in movie cars
Freshly fallen snow
Raggedy dresses
Waterfall rainbows
Socotra trees
Ripped pantyhose
Unmatched socks
Leaves in transition
Innocence and sunflowers
Lighthouses and words written
Familiar kitchen patterns
In a stranger’s house
New Orleans architecture
A cemetery mouse
Flip-flops in winter
Zebras and block parties
Cinnamon and cloves
Whiskey and Bacardi
Candy in pillow cases
Static electricity in the dark
Barun Valley and painted faces
Houses made from tree bark
Wrap-around porches
Neon city lights
Lightning-bug torches
Thunderstorm nights
Epicurean summers
Lapis Lazuli skies
Youth prayers in rocking chairs
Heterochromatic eyes
May 2015 · 514
Lost Sheep
Lucy Tonic May 2015
Angelic minds deflowered
By the ice cream in hell
Now master becomes servant
With sandwich board and bell
No one wants damaged goods
They’ll put you under a spell
Of shame, flames, and runaway trains
And secrets not to tell

Fall back into the rhythm, love
Fall upwards to the sky
Forget the sword and rose, love
Your heart will get you by
Fall forward into sin, love
Rise downwards to the earth
Forget the author of these words
Your death triumphs your birth
May 2015 · 434
Light Night, Dark Day
Lucy Tonic May 2015
A cell is a tumor is a star is a sun
A prison for prisms of light
A square then a circle then a spiral when it’s done
But the shapes are always changing
And on a light night or a dark day
Find your soul in a constellation
The cup of mystery is the sky, if you may
Find the answer in a fateful cloud and pray
Who knows where the time goes
If only your body could go where your mind roams
To have the grace to look death in the eye
When beasts aren’t cruel, it’s us who are wild
And on a dark day or a light night
Picture yourself as the main creator
Gather life from other worlds with all your might
And transplant them here for later
May 2015 · 846
Space Ballet
Lucy Tonic May 2015
The Moon is rising like the Eucharist
Lunacy is its laughing sacrament
And my zenith awaits in Saturn's tryst
Still I hope this trip was no accident
Some say outer space is God's holy hall
And only a fool would call it their bane
Symphonies vibrate these sterile white walls
Still I miss the blue Earth's primitive reign
But I'm no longer gravity's sweet child
My ego is eclipsed by stars in sway
The existential woe is denial
But it helps to keep my demons at bay
(This mission is a bright neon arcade
In the cosmic riddle's endless tirade)
May 2015 · 501
Warm Progress
Lucy Tonic May 2015
A new world opened up today
Right before my eyes in May
An asphalt jungle of barren space
Transformed to a marketplace
Of shaking hands and lazy feet
Of sweetened sweat drawn by the heat
Of spices, mixtures, drink and dine
Of herbs and paper, food and wine
Where freelance poets and barefoot souls
Can wonder in a wandering flow
Where worry's gone and work is done
And getting lost is half the fun
Till 'neath your soles is verde lush
And gathering is quite the rush
When singles, triples, droves and pairs
Unite in glee at what they share-
A celebration worth the fare
For exorcism of despair
And when the artificial lights
Dim amidst the stars in flight
I'll ponder in my solitude
Why blissful moments still elude
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