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Mar 2014 · 351
It Hits You.
LS Mar 2014
Nobody is completely empty
When you are with your friends
Or loved ones.
Not completely.
It's there, of course.
That sad emptiness.
But not all the way.
It hits you on the bus ride home
When he sits across from you
And won't look at you.
It hits you when you wake up
From your naps.
It hits you when you're stuck
In nightmares
And then you scream and
It hits you when you
Think you
Might be happy
Enough to not want to die
But then it hits you
And you feel it all over again.
Flicker of hope diminished, just like that.
Mar 2014 · 330
Flicker of Hope
LS Mar 2014
I see the light
At the end of this tunnel
I think
I have her back
In my arms again
Her black hair
And blue eyes
And skinny waist
Is all mine again,
I'm starting to exercise,
Something I haven't done in a year.
I'm taking better care of my hygeine.
(It wasn't too bad before)
I have goals,
No more bad grades
But better ones
This year I will change
And not tomorrow
But TODAY.
Today I will do work
And work out
And make love
And eat merrily.
Then make love some more.
That is my plan.
Mar 2014 · 245
We Die Many A Time
LS Mar 2014
They say you die once but 
Death is a greedy thing
That steals living parts of you 
And keeps them until you 
Pay him with your beating heart.

The first thing death takes
Is innocence. 
It takes it however,
Slowly or suddenly,
Letting ignorance 
And naive thoughts go with it.
Death drinks it up,
Laughing at this 
Young and ignorant taste left
In his sour mouth.

The next is youth, 
He takes it until 
You are full of wrinkles
And you can't hear
Or see properly
And he drinks it up
And laughs at your 
Blind and deaf features
As you stumble around,
Waiting for somebody to lean on.

Next is beauty,
He lets you hold it in your hands
Until he slips it from your 
Fingers 
And into his cup, 
Drinking the conceited thoughts 
And ***** lips.

Death takes love,
And leaves a bitterness 
In our hearts.
He takes hope,
And leaves an emptiness 
In our heads.

Then you die, and all you have left to give him is your ****** heart
And memories
And he his happy,
All because death hates
Sudden heart deaths,
But he likes to wait until we are old
And full of regret.
We die many times.
Mar 2014 · 282
One Year of Death
LS Mar 2014
Im wearing her favorite color
(green)
I can't believe it's been a year
Since she last took a breath
I can't believe
I thought I lived in a world
With Adrienne for three months
Then realizing she was dead
She had cancer, you see.
Her hair falling out,
Couldn't eat chocolate.
A two time state wrestling champion
Who couldn't help but stretch
The truth,
But I still couldn't help loving her like a sister.
She wasn't weak
Or sickly
Her crazy hair and showing ribs
Was just... Adrienne.
Nobody recognized
What she had was killing her,
Because she didn't seem to be dying.
I didn't see it coming.
I subconsciously had confidence
That her attitude
And love for life
Would pull her through
With barely a scratch.
Now I'm here with pictures of her
And notes on my camp pamphlet
From her
And she is gone and gone and gone
An I want her back.
Mar 2014 · 291
Freak Out
LS Mar 2014
Im such a ******* failure
End of the quarter
And I have like two d's
And an F in geometry!
That's my ******* report card
To come home with?
I'm going to be grounded.
I hate that disappointed look
That my parents get
And their 'no grades no college'
Speech
Because they don't see
That all that does
Is tear me down
And make me want to give up
On everything
Including living
Because my sister is amazing
And going to an ivy league school
In new ******* York
And she is becoming a surgeon
And then there's Lindsey
The little lesbian black sheep
Who fails her classes
No hope for that one
I just get negative negative
All around me
And I hate it I HATE IT
SO ******* MUCH
PUT A *******
BULLET IN MY BRAIN
AND SWALLOW ALL THE PILLS
AND CUT ALL MY VEINS
JUST TO ENSURE I DIE.
That's the only way
I'll ever be remembered positively
In my house.
'such a shame'
And my mom will go pray to god
And ask why and think he works in mysterious ways
But he doesn't
It's my choice.
Nothing mysterious about it.
Mar 2014 · 478
Enjoy
LS Mar 2014
You must take the time
To see what you live for.
I live for books
And first kisses.
For drunken young nights
And awkward first times.
I live for my teachers
Stupid jokes
And my friends *******
I live for
Forgetting what happened last night
And all the faults I have made
I live for laughter
And Mykayla's smile,
Especially her smile.
I live for love
And beauty
And respect
And revenge
And hate.
I live for it all.
For the good and the bad.
That is what makes life
Worth living.
Mar 2014 · 369
Lost in Psych
LS Mar 2014
I feel underwater
With time slipping by
Containing of headaches
And lies an kisses
And the only time I get to breathe
Is when I'm alone
And I can see where Im going
(down down down)
I feel useless
And unlovable
Im lost I'm my mistakes
And my torn heart
I lose myself in tears
And fast breaths
Mar 2014 · 306
Soul eater
LS Mar 2014
I am not who I used to be
I eat souls
That have fallen for me
I spit them back out
With their ***
As well
I'm heartless
And full of audacity
And stupidity
But I dont care
I have no morals anymore
I take what I can get
And steal even more
I'm hated
And loved
I'm full of regrets
But I'm me
An that's who I ******* am.
Mar 2014 · 205
Untitled2
LS Mar 2014
Their smiles seem so
Promising and loving
But their eyes show nothing but greed
You can hear the soothing voice
Whispering lies into your ear
And you know
It's all just a game
On who can feel you
And who can use you
It's all on killing
Whats inside
All your happiness an hopes
All gone gone gone
For a bumpy kiss
On a bumpy road
Headed nowhere.
Mar 2014 · 371
Beaches
LS Mar 2014
Everybody around me
Walks in warm sand
That is sturdy enough
To Hold them up
And Just the right
Amount if clingy
That sticks to your
Cheeks and legs
And torso.

I walk in
Cold sand
That swallows me whole
And let's me fall
And it clogs my
Ears so I cant hear
And scratches my eyes
So I am blind
It runs to my lungs
Through my nose and my mouth
So I cannot breathe.
Mar 2014 · 384
The thoughts of a whore
LS Mar 2014
They're so obvious
In their want and desire
Hands itching to *****
And lips longing to kiss
It's unabashed and blunt
Greedy eyes staring
Down your shirt
And you say to yourself
"it's me they want"
Boy after boy
Ad you feel your skin
Become loose
And your hips jutting out
And your smile turn into a smirk
Because they can say
"you're not a *****"
But in their eyes you can see
That word printed
Into their corneas
And pupils
And you know.
Ÿöü know you are a *****.
But so wasted and spent,
You give up,
And let the next boy
With unpracticed hands
And sloppy kisses
Have you.
It's only after that you
Can even feel like crying.
Mar 2014 · 428
I Miss You
LS Mar 2014
I miss believing
It was forever,
You and me.
I wish I could say 'no, I'm Mykayla's.'
All I have left
Are these notes
And these pictures
And all these ******* promises
Of forever in every *******
Corner of my room
And bookbag
And heart.
I miss your laugh
And holding you when ÿöü sleep
And I love how your body twitches
When you dance it's adorable
I still have everything
I miss our forever
You were my safe haven
And right now
I need you
And I'm so sorry
Sorry sorry sorry
Sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry
Sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry
Sorry sorry sorry sorry
Sorry sorry sorry
Sorry sorry
Sorry.
For all I've done.
Mar 2014 · 231
Realization.
LS Mar 2014
I lay here in bed
With wet hair
And a book in my hand
And it hits me..
What I have traded her for.
I've traded her cuddles
For a cold bed.
Her kisses for a
Drunken strangers.
Her love for
A boy who won't remember my name
In the morning.
I've traded her comfort
For nobody to hold me
Her sweet caresses
For a heavy body on top of me
All because
'I want to be free'
But I want to go back in
That cage
With her and scream **** the  world
And be with her and be with her
And be with her and be with her
And be with her and be with her
And be with her and be with her.
Feb 2014 · 340
Solutions
LS Feb 2014
And my friends don't know
What I'm going through
I just want to fast forward
And make it better
I want a smile on my face
That isn't plastered on
And I hate myself for being
One of THEM, ....
Those poor me im sad
People I love to mock
But here I am
And I feel it
It isn't even sadness
It's pain and sorrow
And I wish my heart felt different
Than it does when it beats inside
My chest
Because it feels off
And it hurts and is sick
And tired of beating
And living.
I want to give up give up
But I can't I have everything
I'm going through
And I hate myself for everything
Because its all my fault
All of it
All my pain and sorrow
Was caused by me!
And I don't know how to fix it.
I picture a blade
Going on my wrist and I feel
My body want it.
I picture taking antidepressants
And I feel my body
Get excited for the blanket
Of gray it could have with it.
I picture a counselor
From god knows where
Who will listen
And hold me when I cry,
And I start to cry when thinking of it.
I picture Mykayla,
Who is always there for me,
But sometimes I jus want her
To wrap her arms around me
And love me
And I want to feel it
Because I alway knew it was there
But I could never receive it.
I want to now.
But now it's too late.
I picture a gun
And a thrill goes through my body
Thinking of the hard metal
At my temple.
I think of the notes I'd have to write
And I think of all the reasons why
But none of them
Could forgive me.
So I guess I will just sit here
And cry
And hurt.
Because I can choose absolutely
None of those solutions.
Feb 2014 · 440
Pro Life #2
LS Feb 2014
Abortion makes me cry.
That was US.
Sitting in our mothers,
A little miracle waiting to happen.
And then we did happen.
We grew and grew and our mothers
Held us and sang to us
And talked to us
And thought of us 24/7.
Then there we were, in her arms,
In our fathers,
In our adoptive parents.
But whoever it was,
They looked at us and cried,
Smiling at the future
And the present and everything to
Possibly come.
We were HERE.
In this wonderful,
Beautiful world.

But we lost many.
We watched them
Get ****** out,
Get thrown away.
We felt them die.
We felt the fear,
And the pain.
The burning pain.
And all we could think of
Was 'one of us is gone.'
We didn't know
We were alive
Because of spite
And anger.
We only knew our mothers
Whistle
And voice and laugh
And walk.
We knew nothing of
How or why,
Just that it was.
But we were gone anyways.
Feb 2014 · 233
I'm the One
LS Feb 2014
I feel my lonliness curl
Comfortably into my heart
Im the only one
Who wants to kiss my scars
Who wants to whisper
"you're beautiful" to me
I'm the only one
Who holds me at night
And I'm the only one
Who dries my tears away
I'm the one
Who entertains myself
With what ifs
And unforgivable cowardice
Of being turned down, and
Of being turned away.
I am my own lover.
And I will fall asleep with
My arms around me tonight.
Feb 2014 · 258
I want to be happy
LS Feb 2014
I wan to pull the trigger
And swallow the pills
I used to never
Cry at night
Every night
But now I guess I will
And I can't stop the tears
Cause I'm crying for me
And nobody else
I hate myself
And want it all to end
I want to be happy,
I really do,
I just don't know how.
Feb 2014 · 254
Nonsensical
LS Feb 2014
I have never felt this way
Where there is only one person
I hate and despise
And that's me.

                          I hate myself.
My body.
My mind.
My heart.

                               I feel dead.

As if a beauiful girl
Showering her love
And her awe to me
Wasn't enough.

                                I broke that girl.

With empty promises
Coming from a throat
Sore from screaming
At the world.

No, I couldn't leave her alone
But I needed to be alone
In the end.
I hate myself.

Im free.
But I'm not.
I can't let go.
I hate myself.
Feb 2014 · 300
I want her.
LS Feb 2014
I hope that I make her feel
So beautiful and ****
And that when she looks in the mirror
She sees a wonderful smile
And big unyielding eyes
I want her to see curves
And hips
And *****
And ***
And lips that know how to kiss
I want her to feel ****
Like I'm not worthy of even touching her
I want her to realize how beautiful
And perfect
Every corner of her body is
And I want her to delight
In her confidence
And I want her to walk with pride
And I want to show her off
To the whole ******* world
To yell "see! See?! She is perfect
And proud an I love her
And she is mine!"
And most of all,
I want her to believe it.
Feb 2014 · 716
Rant. Best friend probs.
LS Feb 2014
I control who even steps into that car.
Where she goes. What she does.
I control that.
Well,
I could.
I have that power.
So just be ******* thankful I'm letting her
Give you a ride home.
Don't ******* whine about having to go
My locker first,
Or her wanting to walk me out to my bus.
That's her job.
She is my GIRLFRIEND.
And you're supposed to be my best friend.
All you ever want to do is drink
Or smoke
Or sneak out
Or have *** (with a guy)
Spending the night at my house
Doing nothing but watching tv
Eating our faces out
And talking till 3am
Doesn't suffice anymore.
And I can't figure out why.
I've been there, I've done the whole party scene.
I've gone out,
Got drunk as ****,
Faded as hell,
Had *** for three hours.
Done every bad thing without it being too bad.
It's fun, for awhile.
I just don't see the pull anymore.
And all you see now,
IS that pull.
That's all ÿöü want to do.
You even drink alone.
You're only 16
For chrissakes,
Slow down.
See your youth.
See your potential.
Little miss
"I might have chlamydia/be preg"
Get your head on right.
Feb 2014 · 280
I cut
LS Feb 2014
I feel my fingers grip
The razor blade
Been there for me since I was 13
I still get a rush
From it
And I still feel my lips
Curl into a smile
When I do it
I love the slice
Of my pale skin
An the bubbling crimson
That sting when I try to sleep
Let's me focus on something else
Than my pitiful memories
Part two.
Feb 2014 · 352
Poor me and my sadness
LS Feb 2014
My sadness is a sea
I'm lost in it
Swirling with the current
Letting it take me
And the salt water
Tastes like my tears
That are on my pillow
I close my eyes
Every night
And dream
Of being happy
I reach for it
I try and grasp it
But I cannot quite reach it
My fingertips graze it
But then I fall back again
Into my sea...
Part one of this website.
Feb 2014 · 705
Bitching about this.
LS Feb 2014
I really hate all of you on here.
Your poems ****.
"poor me and my sadness"
"I cut myself"
This place is all about desperate love
And cigarettes and scars
And him or her
Well good for you
But I don't see any happiness
Just the same thing over and over
" I smoke"
"lines across my arm"
"him. You thought of somebody."
Soo original.
Feb 2014 · 665
Distant
LS Feb 2014
And I just can't feel it
The feeling of life
There's a Glass window
Between me and reality
I can't feel my own fingertips
Running through my hair
Or get that feeling
I used to get listening to my music
I don't like drinking
I don't like smoking
I don't feel amazement
Or happiness
Just a grey
With no emotion
No blue or red or green
Just grey
It's like my heart and head
Are muted
And I look at my life
Like its a ******* joke
I don't know if I feel
Or if it's just my imagination
I say I care
When I should care
But I really don't
I just don't want you
To hate me
For being an unattached little *****
But that's what I am
So I wake up every day
With a grim smile on my face
Im nt growing distant to you,
I'm growing distant to everything.
Feb 2014 · 374
Tired
LS Feb 2014
I feel so tired about everything.
Every kiss,
Every laugh,
Every time I blink my eyes
Or take a bite of food.
I feel myself grow weary
With every step
And every movement
Feel myself tire
As a new day dawns.
I know I care
But I can't seem to find it
The only thing I care about
Is other peoples feelings
And I feel selfish and guilty
For ever thinking of myself about anything
And I'm heavy and tired
Every step I take
Is another weight on my back
Sleep.
Sleep sleep sleep,
All I want is to drift
Through time
With closed eyes
And a dead mind
I feel this way a lot.
Feb 2014 · 571
A Little About Me
LS Feb 2014
I have been on here quite awhile.
So here are some facts:
I have really long blond hair
I'm not super skinny but I'm not fat either.
Some say I have a beautiful smile.
Others say I need braces.
I have freckles
That only come out in the summertime
And I'm straight.
My only exception is Mykayla.
We've been together for over a year.❤
I can't find any drive to do school
I feel tired
And worn out but
I'm only 15...
I like to write poetry
But I love to read it more
And I have no idea what I want
In the future
And I'm scared
And intimidated
To go to college
And I want to cry
About things but I can't
And the world is too big for me
And I hate money
But love it at the same time
I feel like my country is too proud (America)
And I am a worrier
Who loves to bury her face
In books
And pillows
I can live my fantasy world
For years,
Reading keeps me awake
It makes my mind keep on going and going
These nights I stay up late
I can close my eyes
It's 12:11 am
And I've got school in the morning
But my head is too full
It is all the time
I'm exhausted
But I haven't raised a pinky
I want the world handed to me
But I'm too lazy to reach
Feb 2014 · 308
1/28/13.
LS Feb 2014
Over a year of
Kisses and
Hugs
And first times
And flowers.
Over a year of
Holding hands
And shivering skin
And laughs
And memories.
I'll never forget
All that you have given me.
Thank you. ❤
Feb 2014 · 502
Trigger
LS Feb 2014
And I feel as if
I want for nothing
And I lust for nobody
And I love nobody
An all this life
And this world
Is just in my head
And I can't grasp
Anything
I can't hold onto anything
How is this real?
How is her touch real?
I don't know,
But something is anchoring me.
But I know I wouldn't be afraid
To pull the trigger
If it was against my temple.
Only thing I would feel was regret,
And if I'm dying,
Who cares?
Jan 2014 · 540
Objectified
LS Jan 2014
Objectified:
To treat/be treated
As an object, with no feeling
Or thought to their dignity.


I
Feel
That.
I try
To make her happy
Especially
Sexually.
I give her
What she wants
And let her take
What she wants
Because I love her
And want her to be happy.

But the more I try to
The more
I feel
Objectified.
I cannot take
I cannot receive
When I want to.
If she doesn't want it,
But I'm dying to give it,
It doesn't happen.

I just want to be able to
Love her anytime
Touch her anytime (when we are alone)
But every time I bring it up
It flies over her head.
One year.
Today.
Still no compliance from her.
No happy compliance.

All I want is to be happy
And make her happy,
But all I can do is make her happy.
LS Jan 2014
I hate all of you.
All but two of you.
I know my poems ****
But yours **** even worse.
All I see
Is pity me
And like my depression Poetry
No love
On here but desperate love
And I hate it.
It's one thing to write
About it once or twice
But after the tenth time
You forget how to rhyme
Maybe it's slime
Hoping you'll shine
And just those four lines
Sum up your artistic ability.
Sorry.
Jan 2014 · 805
Christbitcha, jealous?
LS Jan 2014
Dear Christina,

I love it. I love the fact I have her, and you do not. It must **** you, seeing me with her. That you cannot kiss her or touch her the way I do. And you don't know all her secrets like I do. You don't know her at all. It must be eating away at you. I love it, because I hate you. *******. I am the one she wants and I am the one she loves. You'll never now half as much as I know. You'll never see her face after a long kiss, or feel her body curve into yours. You'll never see her naked and vulnerable, with big blue eyes looking up and long dark hair spilling over her shoulders. You'll never, ever know. And I smile richly at that. I despise you. Go to ******* hell. Leave her be, and leave us alone. ******* skitch.
Jan 2014 · 388
Depression
LS Jan 2014
Sometimes
When I look into my eyes
I see nothing
But black pupils
Staring back
Sharing nothing---
Emotionless
And physical
With nothing there
And sometimes
I touch my own skin
And I feel nothing
Underneath my fingertips
But the feel of flesh
And mortality
And I think of how wonderful life should be

And how I can't feel
ANY OF IT
I don't see the
WONDER
I don't feel the
AMAZEMENT
of my youth

And that is my depression.
Is that I can't feel anything.
I don't feel sad. Or mad.
And I want to. My depression isn't a
"boohoo hate myself"
It's an
"what have I become?"
Have I no joy in life?
No, I suppose not.
Jan 2014 · 324
My skin
LS Jan 2014
I sit in front of my mirror
And look at my skin
So strange to think
Of the hands still pressed
To my flesh
Of the lips imprinted
In jest and in love
In lust and in drunk
I'm thinking of
My skin and my lips
And where I've been
And where I've yet to be.
Jan 2014 · 871
Fuck You
LS Jan 2014
**** every no
Ever said to me
**** every glare I get in the hallway
**** her
And her fat body
I hate all of them
Every single one of them
Who proudly wear their
"im fake!" sticker
Like its a blue ribbon
I don't give a ****
So *******
**** all of you
I don't care
I got my friends
I got my girl
That's all I need
So all that judgement
Can go straight up your fat ***
And all that priss and ***** and moan
Can go up there too
I hate you
*******
Jan 2014 · 388
How I Say I Love You
LS Jan 2014
I love the feeling of her hair
When it's wrapped in my fingers
And I love the look in her eyes
After we just kissed,
I love her laugh
When I tickle her
And I love her face
When she is staring off into space.
I love the fact she is embarrassed
About her perfect ****
And hides her face when I see it
I love every curve
Underneath my hands
And I love kissing a spot on
Her neck cause it gives her shivers...
I love her.
Jan 2014 · 504
Drink Drank Drunk Kings Cup
LS Jan 2014
My fingers grasp a trash can
My head buried in it
She is rubbing my back
But I don't want her touching me
It makes me even more sick
I just wanna throw up
My whole body
And then some
It reeks of
99 apples
And empty stomach
I wipe my face
Can't even stomach water
And I can't stand up
I can't sit up
My friends grab my arms and pull
Me onto the couch
But I just wanna shove
My sick face into the trash can..
Jan 2014 · 415
Big Sister
LS Jan 2014
She runs up to me
All five feet of her
Her chestnut hair
Glowing silkily
And her dainty
But strong arms wrap around me
And she rests her head on my shoulder.
"I'll miss you"
She says
And I can hear the tears in her voice
And I will miss her too
This girl
I have grown up with
Now off for her junior year
In college,
I will miss you too
My only big sister
Who I look up to so much.
I'll miss you.
Jan 2014 · 2.5k
Airport
LS Jan 2014
The airport
Has a clean smell
That furls into your nose
And on your jacket
And it reaches your
Mind
And your
Heart
The smell
Causes years
It wants you to leave
It wants you to stay
It's the smell of departure
Hopeful and new
Or old and tired
It's leaving
Forever
Or just a couple weeks
It's vacation
And loss
It's departure.
Jan 2014 · 611
Twitter flitter
LS Jan 2014
Anybody want to follow me on twitter?
You can if you like
I can't get a **** picture on
Cause it's stupid.
@hunnybooboo_98
Cause In real life
I'm a big *****
I'm a real faker
Surprise surprise
Jan 2014 · 488
Be My Lover
LS Jan 2014
Oh my where does the time go?
It's after midnight,
The clothes are strung
On the kitchen floor.
You're tasty as a cake,
A recipe I long to taste...
I want to drink you sober,
Want you to feel you move,
Want you to be my lover....
Oh no make no mistake,
For I am just a cat
Dressed up as a hungry snake
A delicate reprieve,
Something to serve my every need...
Jan 2014 · 1.2k
I hate her
LS Jan 2014
I hate everything about her
Her Facebook pictures
And her posts
Her skinny little waist
And big blue eyes
******* hate that *****
It's forever a war
Her pants pulled up too tight
And a ****** look on her face
I'd fight her
I'd gladly hit her
Break each perfect tooth
Out of her ***** mouth
And rip out her hair
And earrings
And **** that *****
Certainly somebody
I would never miss
I hate her
And her friends
I hate her
I hate her
Jan 2014 · 411
I Wanna Be Roxie
LS Jan 2014
And the audience loves me
And I love them,
And they love me for loving them
And I love them for loving me,
And we all love each other
And that's because we didn't get enough
Love in our childhoods...
That's showbiz, kid.
Jan 2014 · 536
Spanish.
LS Jan 2014
mi corazón, mi amor
usted es mi mundo.
el sabor de nuestro amor
es para siempre en mis labios
y en este momento donde miro
en sus grandes ojos azules...
Siento infinito.
<3
Para mi novia
Jan 2014 · 447
The Norm
LS Jan 2014
So much swirling in my head
I can't organize it
All my hurt and my happiness
All my love and hate
In vibrant colors stretching and growing
Disappearing and boldly standing out
I don't know what I'm even feeling anymore
How does my life work
I want to get away
And be free
And be normal
My house is desolate
And unhappy
My heart is as ****** up as
The rest of theirs
I just know how to play the part
Of a normal person
Jan 2014 · 586
Beauty
LS Jan 2014
There's beauty in
Every last kiss,
And in every fight,
A certain beauty
In every new love
And breakup,
Beauty in
Red wine
And smoking
The last cigarette from your pack...
There's beauty
In the morning sky
And in your lovers eyes,
It's in
Tanning out in the sun
And hot chocolate.
The beauty of life
Is in each smile
And it's in
Being naked and close
With someone you love.
It's waking up next to them
And being so happy
They didn't leave.
Jan 2014 · 569
Snip Snip Snip
LS Jan 2014
I sit in front of my mirror
And grab at my legs
And at my fat.
I make scissors with my fingers.
"snip snip snip"
I murmur
Then giggle
If only I could
Snip away my thighs
And my stomach,
But that'll never be.
Jan 2014 · 1.1k
Bony Hips
LS Jan 2014
I love the feel of
Her bony hips
Shivering underneath my fingertips.
Jan 2014 · 437
Try
LS Jan 2014
Try
See stupid carefree pictures
on stupid facebook
All those girls who are so pretty
they don't even have to try

Taste you on my lips
so long since we last kissed,
And all those **** girls
who don't even have to try.

You're holding them instead of me
voluntarily making promises
and reluctantly saying goodbye
those girls who don't even have to try.

And I had to try,
push and scream and cry
for you and then I finally realized
I'll never be one of those girls.

I think I'm okay
and I want to once again try,
but I can't.
I shouldn't have to, just like them.

I don't know what I want
from you or out of you
Just don't be with anyone else.
Don't make me have to try.

Aren't I just as good?
Jan 2014 · 1.0k
Dinner Table
LS Jan 2014
Tight smiles
At dinner again
Compliments to mother again
Little brother leaves the table first
Off he goes to his room he runs
If only my feet could race to my room
Like they could when I was little.

Into the living room
To watch a movie again
Father is already in his chair asleep
Sister grabs a tall glass
Fills it to the brim with Jameson whiskey
And ice.

I try to retreat
To my comforting room
With its comforting smell
And I slip by into the computer room.
After a while I sneak upstairs
Dreading saying goodnight.

Reading a book
Laying down
Mother comes in with an anger.
"why didn't you say goodnight?"
She demands
"what is so special about up here...?"

She leaves with a prim goodbye
And I let out an annoyed sigh
And pore myself into the pages
Trying to forget
How horrible and fake
My family is.
Jan 2014 · 375
Envelope
LS Jan 2014
I
Close  my eyes
I
Imagine a place
Where
Everything is white
Where
There is a crisp envelope
That
I fold perfectly into
That
Seals me up in it
And
I float away
And
I forget because
I
Fall asleep.
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