Love is such *******.
One day you're minding your own business
Then Bam!
You get a good look at them.
And your heart is setting fire
To the rest of your body.
Then you get to know what
Their kisses feel like
(Heaven on earth).
Get to know how they breathe
When they sleep.
How they eat.
How it feels when they touch you.
Make love to you.

You get comfortable in your love.
Confident.

Then you feel them pull away
And the fire is quenched by
A million gallons of salty water
And you're drowning.
You have to cry out all
The water to even get a good breath.
You're drowning and every time
You see them now
You pull deeper
Into the ocean you've created,
Sinking.

Sinking until you've reached the bottom of it
And you can't tell
Which way is up or down
Because you're living
In darkness for days.
Weeks.
Months.

And anyone that talks to you
Is on the surface,
Its all muffled.
You can barely hear them.

After six to twelve months,
The water begins to drain
And you can breathe again.
But the sky is gray
And your lungs are scarred.
And your heart is praying
To please not let it happen again.
Youve learned your lesson.
And love *****.

I know you don't want me
Because let's be honest who would

But please don't leave me
I love you so much this was supposed to be us against the world
You told me I was your forever
Now I'm just your ex

And I can't stand being it
I can't even think that I
Will never get to kiss you again
Or hold you or
Hold your hand
Or go to the movies with you
Or massage your hair

I can't think of you not being mine
Forever

Without wanting to puke up all the anxiety I'm having without you.

I'm so desperate for you.
I can't believe those words you said
Were lies.

I love you.
Can't that be enough?

You left me
With very few words
Said.
No fights,
No falling out,
Just a soft thud
Of a heart falling
To my feet.

It feels so good to talk
To you now.
Like I can breathe again.
Just fresh air full of
Khaylliakhaylliakhayllia
Until I have to go
And my lungs cramp up
And tears threaten to spill.

You say you're empty inside.
I say you were the last thing
That could ever keep me full.

He looked at the cuts on my leg and
Quit talking.
I could feel him staring.

Are those because of...her?

I nodded. And felt shame.

Stupid. I know.  I shouldn't have done it. I muttered.

He shook his head, told me
It wasn't stupid.
He smiled.

I've got some pretty gnarly ones too.

He lifted up his shirt and across his left pectoral were three or four deep white scars.

If people ask I just say a dog attacked me or something. Nobody really knows...

I nodded. Understanding.

Later on that night I
Kissed his scars above his heart.
I heard him sigh
And I fell asleep
Wrapped in his arms.

I thought you cared about me.
I thought you loved me.
I thought you wanted this to be a forever
Kind
Of
Thing.

Now I know it was all a lie.
You and Sam are
"Together but not together"
So I'm letting you go.

I've been hurt before.
Just stop lying and own up to
What you do.

You don't care enough about me.
Its all about her now.
She is new, exciting,
Shiny.
My body is boring now.

Whatever.

I don't have a perfect smile
With pearly straight teeth
I don't have volumious hair
That cascades over my shoulders
I don't have long lashes
That naturally bat themselves
I don't have smooth flawless skin
That people can't stop touching
I don't have slender arms
I don't have skinny legs
I don't have soft cheeks
I don't have small fingers.

But I do have a smile
That brightens peoples days.
I do have long blond hair that
Reaches my waist.
I do have eyes that can smile
And pull anyone in with a look
I do have naturally warm skin
That is inviting to people
I do have muscular arms
I have ropey legs
I have warm red cheeks
And small warm hands to match.

I promise to hold you while you sleep
And listen to your favorite songs
I will always run my fingers
Through your hair and
Find a way to make you laugh.

I will love you with every fiber of my
Imperfect being,
If you let me.

No, I'm not okay.
No, I'm not happier without you.

I just want to be with you.
Only you.
I love you.

You are worth more than every star
That has ever existed,
I want you more than the air I
Breathe through my lungs.

Your smile is worth more than a
Billion of mine.
One of your kisses better than
All past lovers' kisses combined.

I love you so much, it keeps
Me up at night
Knowing I cannot be yours anymore.
I toss and turn,
Waiting for a bleak sleep
To come so I can wake up
And start my bleak day.