The bell's getting louder ...

But I have to find a way out

Cause no one cares

If I don't...

Here we go again
Falling down the rabbit hole

Gray color schemes
Are starting to take control

And my life is passing in fastforwarded short scenes
That express things spinning out of control

But this is not a dream
Nor is it a movie

This a warning sign
That I'm going down a familiar road again

And it pains me down my gut
And my chest
And my heart
And my strength has gone soft


And I dont know if I want to want, anymore
I don't see a way out, anymore
Solutions Ive built with my own hands
Have collapsed so many times
And my hands are sore
And I dont want to want, anymore

I've lost the want to want anything
And this feeling, a bell it rings

And I think am falling down the rabbit hole.


And the people around me they dont seem to care
And I'm scared
I'm really scared

And the people around me are just concerned with one's self.
Even though any concorn for me it ******* helps

And this lifestyle is hell
Its a slippery ***** to depression
And I think Im going down the rabbit hole again ..

Words
Words.
Words.
Codes

Pick up on the pieces
But  its nice to say nothing
Right now

Some hate me right now
Most love me conditionally

Sitting on the concrete
And my thoughts speak
So I stay silent


I treated my friends like kings
And I treated them like ****

I really dont know.

So Ill surrender up
And stay quite
Stay silent
No need to make meaning

And its not sadness
Its not happiness
I have nothing to say
Cause im numb
I did it
I made myself numb again

And all I hear is a soft guitar strum
Tum tum tum tum tum tum
Hovering over my manic and depressive thoughts

So I wont talk ...


And I know my family
Loves me
I know my baby cares
But I dont think they care about me

Or I dont care about me
And Ive lost myself in me

But there's no use of making meaning
So Ill stay quite

Ive been this way since 16
But lately ive been non-existent
And ive been to more places
Than I've dreamt
And Ive meet more people
And Ive done so many things
Ive dreamt i would do

But day and night
I keep stressing my mind
And theres no reason for it
Cause we will all die
That's why  my memories are vague

My memory is our photo on instagram
Of the night I should havr fallen inlove

And he left me
And she left me
She knew me

And my life is ice cold
Under the snow
Burried in white

And I cant
Write words
I cant
I dont know how to make it better
Only worst

Watch the flame of my lighter
Light up over and over
Over and over

And theres nothing but void
On the glittering streets
On the flowers, on the trees
In my skin in my eyes
In the words you speak

I need some aliens to come and tell me the meaning of life
And answer all my whys
So for now
Ill stay quite


Cause words words
Those codes
Im over them.

So let's escalate our senses tonight
Are you crazy like me
Are u in pain like me ?

Let's make sense of it with extreme nonesense tonight

You're in my ears
And every wave of sound you make
Is slowling my heart's pounds
And every word interprets my thoughts
And it makes me feel okay

You are the host to my parade
And your description is on point
Like this song on my life was coined
And my soul and your voice have joined

Don't glamourise busy-ness
Don't glamourise exhausion

Don't be mislead
And think that it's home

To being great.


You  are meant to live each moment
Like it's your own
Stare into the distance
Dance and lay in bed
Work then get bored
Love then move on
Grow and get old.

Accomplishment is a perception
of what you want

Take it easy
Take it slow
And if you want run fast
And lose control
But don't exhaust yourself  
For things you don't want

It's your life your feelings your way
Your time your soul.

So do it how ever you want it
Cause there's no rights or wrongs.
Just try your best to consider others
And carry on.

And you wonder why blood was spilt
And about the wars that have killed
There's things in life you can't accept
You would fight till you die
Than stand a day in its mess

And you wonder why blood was spilt
And about the wars that have killed

Freedom has a high price
And it's not given
It's taken by the oppressed

And you dont have to look far
At the world's most horrific tragedies
Look at your own anxieties

When you act like your living
But every vain in your body
Is shivering.

Cause you're supressed by capitalism
Working day and night
And your opinion is not for the giving.

Nor are you allowed to be sad
Nor are you allowed to be mad
This is how life is, they tell you
This is how life is, they convience you
Don't be a woss
They tell you
Be strong by following me
While I follow what they want me to be
And they follow what they were taught to be
By people who followed their own misery
Thinking this is how life should be

You don't wonder anymore
When you have tasted it
The depression the pain and the downgradment
It drives you insane

You don't wonder
Why the blood was spilt
And about the wars that have killed

Cause freedom has a high price
And it's not given
Its demanded by the oppressed

So, are you up for the battle
Or your ganna shut up, and cry every night?
Down your pills ?
Roll a blunt ?
Down that drink ?
Then go numb ?
And go with the cattle ?

There's things in life you just can't deny
Like how you kept me up this night
How you remind me of something I had inside


And people tell me play it cool
But I can't help if I'm a fool

And I can't explain it but I'll try
You are things I want to be
And an image of someone I didnt want to let go
Call it repeated history  

Cause when you get attached to someone
You search for them in everyone you meet
And when I see even the smallest pieces of  crumbs of  you in them
I like to make believe

Cause I can't help the people I meet at a young age so bleek
The people that leave an impression on me

And now I search for them in everyone I meet
And you resemble something

I can't speak ..
I can't say...

If I did it wont make sense anyway

But there are things in life you just can't deny
Like how your thought kept me up tonight