You know when you get food poisoning and you have to rest your stomach and eat small portions of easy to digest foods for a while till your stomach can digest normally again .

As cheesy as it may sound but I had a soul and emotion poisoning .
And I keep digesting ****** horrible horrible horrible food for my soul .. so how can it heal .
How can I be real again
How can I be here?
How can I be here
How can I exist
When my soul is poisoned

And if we traveled

                                Traveled the world

And if we drove Fast

                                 Windows down

                                                           Music loud

And if we had Time..  Time ...   Time ..


And all the money we wanted


How would it feel ?

Would it feel better than now

Or would the sadness still come around ?

2014 this is a good bye
I know I won't be able to change you
I won't be able to explain to you why
Why we were on the run and why I never had the time

2014 you're like him
You left me paralyzed
Identity crisis
But our photos won't lie

These pictures say we are happy
These pictures say we are young
And these pictures won't lie

2014 I can't call you up
I can't see you
cause you're gone now
you aren't mine

but these pictures say we were happy
these pictures say we were young
and these pictures don't lie

See I replay that silly video that I have
Over and over and over

I might have created a connection deeper than the one you have
Cause I keep replying that video and I laugh

But right now you've gone MIA
And I keep reaching to you
Cause I have so much I wanna say

But you got your ropes tide loose
And you've got so many you can choose

But don't you know that you define me now
don't you know that you've marked me now
don't you know that I'm fragile ..

I don't want to go through this hassle
but I tie my ropes tight
and you're the one that let yourself inside
inside of my soul
I had no Control
I let my feelings rule

But do I want to let my mind rule ?
That kind of life makes no sense to me
it's the love in this life that will set you free
while  my love for you has caged me
Cause
I don't know
I don't know
I don't know
what to do when you're not here

so I keep replying this video of us
and I laugh
and I have created a deeper connection than the one you have

And all of this might not be true
but I just .. I just miss you

you can't play me like that
keep giving me hope then disappear like that
and I can't say that
cause you don't let me through
even though I let you


Limbo is the state you have me stuck at
so I keep replying this video of us
and I laugh ..

Grin till the wrinkles find their place
find their space to mark their trace
The trace of every struggle you couldn't get through
So you grin, grin so they can notice you
Have you seen what I've been through ?
And so you grin to make them understand understand how steep this uphill battle is
Grin grin in their faces, just in case they have missed
Grin till it wrinkles your face
Grin till it leaves a trace
Have you not seen what I've been through ?
If you haven't my face is the proof .

I thought if I ever got this lost
Someone or something would find me

I thought if I ever felt this low
I might just drop dead and die

But the thing about life is that it keeps going
It doesn't care how you survive

And the thing about you is that you don't care enough
And the thing about me is that I keep hoping you will
And my hope you ****
every time .

And if the Sun keeps burning
Then I can keep  going
Even if I burn alive knowing
Every word you said every body movement you did
Every place the thought of you took me to was meant to bring me back on my knees begging

It's a circle that keeps going
I know you I've known but somehow I lost my knowing
I love you I've loved you but somehow I lost my loving
you reach through me you've reached through me but somehow you've decided to rip out you're roots that've  reached deep through me

but it's a cycle so roots keep growing
and I keep knowing that I know better than this
and I keep asking where and what I have missed
and I keep blaming myself

I've buried myself in this list of things I need to be  doing
Buried so deep that my dreams stopped showing

I used to know myself but somehow I've lost my knowing
I can't tell if I'm fragile or this weight on my shoulders just keeps growing

but if the Sun
if the sun keeps burning
then I can keep **going