i like to look in the mirror
and dissect the person staring back
until features are just jagged lines
and stolen shapes
protruding chin
witchy nose
curved into a long *****
a beard of pimples
surrounding small lips
and a mustache to strike envy into any man
caterpillar eyebrows
darker than the hair on my head
which is dry and flat and falls into my face
chipmunk cheeks
practically falling out of wide cheekbones
long legs
too skinny
knobby knees
hairy white tree trunks
that i suppose pass for legs
spider fingers
no curves
just a pale board
with eyes and skin covered in mold
and red
always red
from
tears
always tears
society's worst fear stares back at me
"ugly"
my own words
i say them to myself now
i see your point

I've waited and waited for someone like you. Its hard to images me with out you. Your kiss. Your touch. Your whiskers when we kiss that little *****. The way our eyes meet. The spark in your step. The way you make me feel without even saying a word. Its the waiting game. I've waited to hear your voice, feel you touch, and breath you in. I now know that you are the reason for my absolute happiness. I love you more that this poem can say. I love you more than word itself. Your not only my bestfriend by the boy in my dreams.

I often forget why it is
That I write.
It's not for potential fame
Nor to prove my "talent"

I believe I write
To release unwanted thought
and bid farewell to
Emotion.

It's wondrous.
How the ink of my pen
turns into that of an endless
River.

The words flow
onto the page.
My sorrow pouring out
With them.

As my magic river slows,
drowning and washing away the
Pain, I let in
Happiness and clarity.

I go day by day trying to please the people around me,
But what is it for,
So they won’t criticize me and put me down,
Or is it to fulfill a deeper subconscious need of approval.
I don’t understand why I must do these things for other people,
I always say I am going to live my life for myself and nobody else.
Judgment is without a doubt one of this world’s biggest fear,
Because judgment means failure,
And failure means to be a social pariah.
Does the outcast have the group of friends that will accept him for what he does and who he is?
Nobody wants to be left behind and spend his or her life alone.
But in reality we are never alone, we are with the greatest friend of all.
The only person that I should have a need of approval from
Is God
And due to the paradigm that our society is in now,
To only accept judgment from God is an option that few people accept.
We must fit in and conform to the social norms to prevent us from becoming outcasts.
What has happened to humanity?
Putting down anybody that is different from everybody else.
I preach this message but I fail to follow it as well.
We pass judgment to cover up our own flaws.
The flaws that we live with everyday make us vulnerable,
And vulnerability means that we are not as perfect as our peers may think,
But I am trying to wrap this idea around my head that vulnerability shouldn’t be a tool for others to persecute,
It should be used to grow strong from and build that relationship with the one true friend that everyone has.
The problem for many people have is with letting God into their hearts and letting him witness their vulnerabilities.
The mask we wear for the people around
Does not give rest to our soul when we are deep in the ground.
I challenge the people to live one day for them.
Do not allow anyone to persecute their actions or judge their life.
Because in the end,
The individual is all that matters.

it's funny
well, funny's not the right word,
it's quite sad actually, how you can just walk by
a little store once visited together
or come across a secret note
written for your eyes only
just anything filled with sweet, perfect memories,
and suddenly you are expected
to just forget
you know?
to just **** it up and deal with it because
it's not supposed to be important anymore.
if you broke down and, god forbid, cried a little
like your heart wants to do
people would stare at you and wonder
why you haven't moved on yet.
there are so many expectations but
it is really easy for someone to just come along
and make these really difficult to meet.
you know?