Silence is the loudest sound of them all.
The deafening emptiness, the stir in my mind.
I am alone.  I am alone.  
I am alone.

Silence with you was different
Than silence alone.
Because silence with you
Still had you in it.

Silence alone
Makes me wonder
If silence with you
Is better than silence from you.
Or if my quiet, but raging mind,
Is better than my heart in your quiet,
but raging hands.

"It gets better" they tell you
Maybe they are right.

As I sway among a blurry haze
Of friends and guitar riffs
Arms around his neck
It feels like this "better" they always told me about.

But why don't they warn you
About the nights that feel like high school
And heartbreak and
Disappointment

That just because he looks and feels
A lot more like a man
Doesn't mean that he is one

That the same songs that cleared your mind
On a long quiet road at 7:00 am
Years ago
Would be what comforted you
In a lonely, tear soaked bed
Tonight.

Maybe I am still a girl.

its almost miraculous
how I spent so long
being so blissfully sure
if you & I

but with every day comes night
and every rain a storm
and every hazy night
a tearful me
a resentful you

it's all I can take

With every new hope
There is new agony

I fall hopelessly and endlessly
For the same blue eyes
The same strong hands
The laughs and the smiles and the
Lies and the emptiness just seem to fall
Into place

When will I learn to grasp this rhythm?

Pain has taught me

That behind every truth is a lie

And behind every man is a boy

And behind every 3am wide-awake night
Are the words you said to me
And can never take back.

I didn't know
It was possible
To fall in love in a single moment.

But as I watched your mouth
Your eyes
Your face light up
With such simple, thoughtless words,

It hit me like a drug.
An all-consuming realization,
That that mouth,
Those eyes,
That face,
You,
Were absolutely everything.

And you're dizzy,
The whole room is spinning
Even in the blackness,
Even though you can't see a thing.

There's a kind of numbness in pain,
A soft, sinking feeling
That lulls you through life.

But when it's dark and you're alone,
And theres nothing to save you,
You start to fall.
Grief is a tightrope,
And being alone is a strong gust of wind
To push you off balance.

I crave clear days,
Filled with endless distractions.
I crave nights spent with friends,
Who don't have black hair,
And blue eyes,
And who never leave me.

Nighttime is my worst enemy.