I miss you
where have you been?
your body’s beside me
your soul’s somewhere else
your mind’s in a ferris wheel
with someone who stole my seat
unsynchronized beats
come back
your face lost its spark
is it me?
I won’t hold you to drown
stay or leave
omitting then approaching
make up your mind

I feel love and thunder
stories beneath me
reforming sailors and hunters
water upon me
a fortune at my center
animals running toward me
will I save them and be humble?
I’m lost, lost and lost
beyond the worlds I sought
a love that will take me to the moon
to jupiter and mars soon
tell me you’re willing to travel with me
to the galaxies, stars will greet
just harmonize in me
I will protect you from heart to feet

show me that you care
a mystical feeling of love
swimming over hopeless seas
we thought the wall we built
would repel any coming fear
but it shook our grounds
weak as the eve of your leave
you selfishly left thinking
I would still stand unfree
you came back winters later
my back lifted your feet
still invisible
still unclear
my soul to you
was a ghost wounding the needs

A miracle,
You were born.
Told me to pray,
All I did was cry.
Like a magical bird, you flutter.
Sweep my pain away,
With every cloud you reach.
The sky dropped you,
It couldn’t handle you.
Too precious for a sulky dome,
Vigorous for a fragile field.
Unreal to have you saving me,
What do your mischievous eyes see?

‪I used to be a lucky star‬
‪the moon drowses‬
‪as my wings burn‬

‪lustrous soul crumbled far‬
‪hey there moon, arises ‬
‪when embers rake, I yearn ‬

I’d like to be a part of your story
but tell me, will you ever be sorry?
for all the pain you caused me
your aimless shadows still haunt me

I want to wake up not feeling lonely
I can’t welcome your body around me
you scar me
you love me
then run to call your army
to put me down on your bed of glory

you draw me like a fairy
you think I’m unwary
I’m chained up dripping sweet cherries

my blood is on your path
my soul will unpack
and all your secrets will find a way back

I don’t know what I want
or what to do
or what to feel
all I know is I’m like a whale
roaming down the moonless ocean
no home is fit for me to sleep
too big in the eyes of a human
too small compared to the sea
what am I supposed to be?
an enormous heart pumping the love away
enough to drown every lover with me
but I’m strange yet a lucky whale
I get to see deep ends and golden keys
never knowing how to start nor proceed
would you mind breathing a little my dear?
spinning in circles of numbness like a freak
welcome to my show I might be mean
I’m a whale in a suit of a human being

I want you to make me feel better
I want you by my side forever
I want you around me like a medal
shiner than all that I can offer
your touch turns my cold heart hotter
than every summer I spent under water
what is it about you that make me scatter
like ashes on your doorway I was a letter
your love felt like a spell casted to pressure
it made my heart stop before my mother
the warmth is fading cover me with leather
can you hear me I’m hidden like a treasure
I left before we dance and dress proper
farewells sweetness hold on to my sweater

it is the end of the day
I do not believe in god
but I am on my knees
conflict with faith yet I pray
for my soul that is flawed
there I cried under the trees

leafs on my skin
feels like a beloved’s touch
stories of heartbreak
there all my pain will begin
waited for the call a bit much
longingly admiring a mistake

lonely in a room of mysteries
plunging into woes
aiming for a notice
isn’t it cruel to wipe the histories
sculptures of us froze
and all we have is a poem

I am sick
so sick
packed up my emotions like bricks
each night is another sweat on my neck

I drift
far I drift
away from my body I shift
to an invisible circle of gifts

I sleep
like a baby on the sheets
silk they may appear
but within is all the nightmares

goodbye I tell you
even in the other life
I will miss you

“are we gonna be okay?”
I heard the man in gray say
sorrowful blue eyes
high cheekbones cut the night
body turned black
as if the fire seemed to crack

“just hold my hand, forget the day”
while blood covers the bay
lonely brown eyes
rosy cheeks illuminate the night
body turned white
as if the air needed another bite

I hate that I have to choose
I hate how we are bound to break
all the nights we traveled the world
we arouse before the sun would escape
eventually our lost hearts found the light
young souls like rays of obscure dreams
gently sewed up the shores we made
assure my mind before the tides strike
and drown the bond that makes you mine

I can wait
if it means I will have you by morning
I can wait
if the stars will birth you non-broken
I can wait
if the tears I wept will flow like a blissful river
I can wait
if the roof we built will be covered in feathers
I can wait
if our souls up in the sky will be hypnotized
I can wait
if my existence will make you mesmerized

oh, they think I am crazy‬
‪yet I left pacing so shady‬
‪standing over the hill daily ‬
‪unvaried views, got me so lazy‬
‪gave up my soul to a blue daisy ‬
‪please take care of it baby ‬
‪do not abandon me so easily ‬
‪erasing my spot, while the sky is hazy ‬

you’re always up on my mind
and for you
I’ll lose it every time

my heart and my essences
reforming shapes
soon to be crystallized

I’m as calm as the ocean
before the ships come creeping in
noisy sirens will make them tear apart

I’m frigidly raging and my waves  
will never join the azure surface
until I finish what I started on my mind

you’re selfish
and I love it
but listen
to my heart
it beats oh just for one
melodic dispositions
I daydreamed and wondered
of your smile brightening my thunders
scars on my brown eyes
I’m forever the prey of the hunters
no more recruiting
dissolve the pieces of my wholeness
I’m lost and you’re found
let me find the way back to my altar
fumbling walls shining in ambers
doors shuttering in dismay
oh angel they must convey
to my loner heart there they will obey
you’re still selfish
but I despise it

what’s the point of apologizing after scarring me deeply,
but you know I stayed silent and loved you so dearly.

lusting for a love that lifts her up
to the skies
clearer than the sight of the water
in his glass

so many names to call him
she tried
but one time he called her darling
on grass

she kept the memories in a box
before she dies
but not long ago until we met
at the overpass

our eyes swiftly collided
in disguise
went home and dreamt of you
filling me with sass

your shape stuck in my mind
it’s crystallized
forever shining my love
you consumed my gas

call me the names you desire
I shall be hypnotized
when will we ever meet again
I wonder in class

you are a dream
the greatest love you symbolize
still dreaming
come anew or we’ll stay in impasse

ease off for your own sake
loosen up those old scars
replace them with new smiles
you’re too young to be breathless
I ask you why you are
frightened from shadows that are faceless
you answer how you are
building up walls
around a soul that is faithless
but I hug you tight
putting my hand facing yours
like we’re one dot fell into connectedness
a forever of soft touches of tenderness
I love you beyond endlessness
trust me I will always be here
for always by your side until soil cover us
then we will forget all the wounds
that made you crawl until you were found
I found you pale and bloodless
all alone in the woods
I shed a golden tear
because I was you
and you were me
we were separated by fear
neither one of us went to nowhere
we were always bounded by despair
we touched the surface and forces exploded
we were left up to the blueish violet sky
my soul disintegrated
your body was divided apart
here we are again standing as one

am i asking for too much
all i need is a hug
and a shoulder to lay my tears on

am i asking for too much
i opened my heart to vulnerability
and the pain started to play with me

am i asking for too much
i’m sick of hiding
i wanna shine

am i asking for too much
all i need is a little helping
to make my stars bright again

so tell me, am i asking for too much?

hypocrites speak
and broken hearts seek
a love that will lean
into a forever of years
a forever of them, a forever of us

but what is forever if we don’t catch the sun
get the light in the suburbs of fun
and we will dance
above the grass

let me tell you one word that will last
in the ears of lovers that confide
in each other’s hearts
and to forever they may last

pityness is all i got
when all i ever needed was love

they think i am exaggerating when i say
i am a private one
i am a dark one, i am a shallow one
i am a sealed book
my lock is lost
and the key
at the deepest ocean tossed

do not try to open me
i mistakenly paved a bleak lane
and all the feet commonly turn away
when they feel the coldness of my heart
boosting the grounds from my narrow part

do not think you are my saving king
or my providing queen so just back away
and when i say you are just like the others
i was not exaggerating when i said

i love loving you
i love the way you love me too
in sunset we welcome the shadows
we sneak to share love in a mad show

two bodies connected in heart and soul
painting a picture of two fools
fell in love too early and forgot to mourn
for their soon to be smoldering souls

they warned me before but i was on a cloud
they tried to reach me but i poured down
rainy lies assuming i finally figured it out

i have dug the hole
now it’s time for me to stay there in whole
hopeless romantics making mistakes
oh so bold

i have mastered the arts of being shut
a lonely closed mouth all year but
only because my words had turned to dust
from the day my teeth been cut
and i hated the way things went unjust
dead flowers inside my guts

a goddess in the night
when the bright sun was peeling
like a wild flower
being picked up from an empty ceiling
like a hurricane shattering every appearance
from a youthful child’s appealing
to a dull grayish feeling

she was born again in the evening
hearing every judgment like a knife
cutting through the wounds of healing
she was nobody but somebody to me then

she had the essences of me when i was leaving
a body of a soul that was not leaning
to let the sky’s tears wash off deep ends
of sad songs colliding to let you speaking
words you’ve never heard before
to a lovely womanly hearing

i am her and she was me
but she was fearing me
and i wasn’t letting her seeking
the discomfort of the godlessly meaning

maybe the two strangers
looking at the same shining light
shared the most graceful moment
of their lives
without a clue in mind
what the stranger’s name was
but they knew what they smelled like
and maybe these strangers
shared more moments than we ever can

alone in summer and winter
alone in the eve of your disappearance
alone all my life i have been
until i died

the loneliness of the cold breeze of winter
made me freeze to death
but i was made alive in your presence
alive all my life i have been
until i die next to you in the warmth of summer

when you’re about to speak
but you remember your opinion
will go nowhere
nobody will listen, nobody will be here
you’re alone in a noisy room
a room full of people
with their ears closed
even their hearts
are just as cold as the night you were born

i love you beyond reality
to every universe we might exist in
i love your sweet melody
to my heart i’d recognize
wherever you sing
i’d follow
and whenever you cry
we’re shallow

you get lost in a person
the obsession is real
and you’re nervous

the numbness
of your feet on the ground
is exposing
all the fun you had in your mind

a fire is burning within you
it’s time to consume or sweep
the ashes rapidly falling upon you

you’re getting burned otherwise
you’re the one to decide
how to hold the pain
that is your broken heart

between tomorrow and yesterday
i lost myself in today

the needing of comfort
shamefully filling up my skin
the hurt of survival
pridefully flying over my head

i need to **** the master
before my heart becomes an item
to the land of the dead we run faster
than the sun hits the *******

confronting the followers of a soul sucker
“no need to feel” they say after the ******
well, hell with it
**** me before i stop feeling

i am alive because of my feelings

i longed for the dreamy eyes of yours
glowing like crystals, inside a cuckoos
ringing in my ears, a delightful sound
happy me and happy you, in a paradise
i dream of you
i lust for you
i wish that you would see me too
but how could i have that touch
when my hands haven’t made it yet
to hold you at my best
shaky fingers can’t hold a piece of heaven
i dropped you down to carry me
selfishly thinking i love you
resting your head upon me
i just loved the idea of you

when everybody knows your name
yet, you are nowhere to be in shame
about the story
when you and the devil meet
in a strange spot to steal the keys
of a graceful kingdom
no soul’s willing to leave

but when that revealing morning came
it woke you up to a noisy day
then your eyes and the gleamy light,
coincided; making the power embrace
to expose the giggly masquerades
in their no longer hidden space

the screams of manipulative souls
and their vile ways of telling lies
they no longer can destroy the night
nor the lovers in sunlight
nor the skin on skin delight
nor the sincere feeling of excite

no genuine soul can hear the ache
as if the pain is a muffled joke to fake
no sign of suffering my child can see
like if the mockery made the dead
drag the fools to be fed
by their ceaseless lies ahead