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Lama Apr 2021
if anything, it will make you ill
to dream of recurring realities.
incapable of sleeping,
you wished for immortality.
beating up a damaged seeker
to detain a remorseful show,
but the golden chains
will only make the past
an elegant foe.
nested with tears on your palm,
enough to irrigate unheard roads.
stepped on with nowhere to be,
reluctant futures you sought.
but if anything, you will float with pride
carrying an unborn love, seas ahead.
if heart is a white feathered kite,
then life is yours, marvelous kid.
Lama Mar 2021
we were too similar
we lost ourselves
pulling my feet down
a lost leaf burrowed
silent interactions
strangers’ tunes
taught us love
even fires swooned
what was lost in october
came back gently in march

full moons
blossomed fears
started a fight
to make you mine
do my eyes remind you
of pearls you kept as a kid
does my laugh ring in your head
sowing memories to come alive
ripe those words you steal me by
call me yours even if you can’t
Lama Mar 2021
I woke up alone in my bed
welcoming the air to cave in
creating a melody as I breathe out
making the rays dance around my room

then my heart took another beat
and the walls were tuned in
like a crowd clueless about the show

stories beneath me, my feet stepped on
memories reviving from floor’s glory
an ancient soul could have sworn
I was the first to feel this lonely

life surrendered as I whispered
agony to push my soul up
from a surface of forged memories
resisting reality to keep me numb

for once, I was able to feel the sky
lifting my tanned fingers to wrap the clouds
a bird rested on my branch to ask
“how does it feel to wander bewildered,
  wrecking the future and sleeping wounded,
  reaching the sky to neglect the ground’s fight?
  I will get you down for one more chance
  but remember, it will be you leading the way.
  it has been a pleasure meeting you,
  I will read a story to wake you.”
Lama Feb 2021
I write for the dead
whom I keep alive
long live the dead of the night
standing in my memory to keep it alive

I wail for the dead
devoted tears mended my spine
voices inside my head
conducted my fall

I lied to the dead
their graves haunted my grounds
faked my death to escape
but my soul got stolen in chains

let the dead live within
soon they will gnaw
at the deepest roots
until the soul cave in
howling of sorrow
longing for a rescue
but the body reeks
bleak and shallow
emptiness then
for infinite days
Lama Feb 2021
the sound of nothingness
soothing my brain
from missed calls
buried under my pillow

a burning candle
smothering the roof
but my throat choked on
words that never made my note

I slept away my hopelessness
praying the rain would wash it away
the thunder woken a light within me
my desires stormed like a clenched beast

I never intended to harm you
if I could change the past
I would never run away from you
alas, self. I was too cruel for you to last
Lama Feb 2021
in a room full of people
my heart lingers of loneliness
as the shadows of my fingers
turn into one soulless silhouette.

intertwisted skin solaced in warmth
dreading my own happiness
like a painted smile
with all of my pain
underneath it
a southed yearn dying north
urged to lead the madness.
Lama Jan 2021
I miss you when you were a stranger
just a thought in someone’s brain
you captivated me faster than a beetle
a sweet memory keeping me sane

but even before the fourth night
I knew our ground wasn’t stable
I cried in a gray colored corner
reading stories about a dead woman

I didn’t realize the pain that I created
blurry in my head were your words
to sweep you out wasn’t the hardest
but to think it was all to fill a dark void

I walk empty handed again
it’s a familiar feeling yet I loath it
my fingers braided you with poems
now I unknot us from a virulent lane

now I am a stranger breathing fire
within your lungs I ash the moments
of your lies my kind heart was tired
pillows we dreamt on left us in torment
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