The numbness has begun to fade And now I descend into panic As every single ******* thing I've been through and never told Every single thing I never Had the chance to cry about Every single ******* thing I've held in since I was six Is bursting at my seams, And no amount of stitches Can keep it from leaking out
I am beaten down, worn out, utterly emotionally and mentally exhausted And a giant weight sits on my shoulders that I carry around all the time A choice I have to make. Do I break what's already broken, or leave it to break others
I've been teared apart, destroyed, hurt, and broken The constant hell I've been living in is (has been) home And it's sad to realize it's comfortable to be so numb
When knuckles crack And spine snaps Front to back The lack Of sleep Ages me And I sit wearily Wary and waiting For the next cup of coffee To rouse me Cheap breakfast sandwich As breaks squeal and sound this Wednesday morning stress Fifteen minutes away From starting the day Then it is ten to twelve Hours before the self Is allowed to emerge They purge me Of anything that makes me me Fifteen minutes back To the big mac And another ten or twenty Depending on how the traffic rolls Fast or slow You know All I want to do is hit the sheets **** my ***** swollen feet Just let me sleep