I remember the time, when we first met
our eyes locked
both so intertwined with desire
wondering what could happen

I remember the time, when we had a conversation
the depth was like a bottomless ocean
falling into the trench that lied deep within us
both mutually zealous

I remember the time, when I gazed into your eyes
stars danced instead of your pupils
your universe formed so perfectly
freely fabricating constellations

I remember the time, we first drank alcohol together
both intoxicated out of our minds
truth spilled out without a worry
like an overflowing glass of water

I remember the time, that I found out
you had met another
her golden hair glittering in the breeze
whilst my own limp brown fringe drooped like a dehydrated flower
over my melancholy eyes

I remember the time, I walked alone
the grey clouds matching my grey thoughts
as I looked across the reservoir, so still and untouched
wondering if the stone I just dropped into the water
would create a ripple: a change, a conversion in your head
about me again.

I remember all the times.

i tried to spend time with you inside my head
because i'm not important enough for you to give up a lunch break for
or to sleep beside on a 2 o'clock august afternoon as you make the light shine through my bedroom window.
brown was never my favorite color, until i saw your eyes through my tears.

                you think it's romantic to **** the girl that writes poetry about you.
                the first time we slept together you took your underwear off first.
                and kissed my forehead and told me you loved me.

i'm asked why i don't leave you
and i say i live in a house with too many rooms.
that i want everything to happen to me as it happens.
i think you have the most beautiful mind
you're the type of person that people write songs about
and stay up all night crying over
praying to their imaginary friend for the pain to stop.

I dip my toes in the tide
adjacent to the edge of my all-consuming paracosm.
The water is cold
alluring
unsteady
absolute.

Within it lies the demise
of one thousand dreams
999 unfulfilled wishes
And just over 13 ‘what if’s.

Right outside my humble fantasy
I spy a silhouette,
my potential self.

Warily I take a closer peek.
The girlish apparition reveals nothing
She seems to hold her breath while I lean farther in
And at long last, deserting all juvenile fancies,
reality greets me as I timidly wade
Into the waves.

God, you're like crack.
He ran his hands down my body.
His eyes and body burned.
Just hurry up, my buzz is dying.

just before you die
they say your life goes flashing by
well i am and for my self I do not want to see my own truth
so I have decided I do'nt want to die...full stop.

Soft rays of light
Dance tenderly in my room at Night
Casting shadows on the ground
And on the floor of my bedroom
Late at Night the Fairies dance
In those rays
The caressing breeze
Waltz through the treetops
While streetlights like crystals shine
All Night long
Little owls in the trees
Hoot and call to each other
Crickets, katydids and tree toads
Sing late at Night
In the softly stirring breeze

**~Marian~